10. Theory
"Theory," Jacob read.
"Can I ask just one more?" she entreated instead of answering my demand.
"No... I said it was my turn," Jacob said, laughing.
Bella rolled her eyes.
"But seriously, don't let her ask another question," Jacob said. "I want to know what she's thinking already."
This time Bella chuckled.
I was on edge, anxious for the worst. And yet, how tempting it was to prolong this moment. To have Bella with me, willingly, for just a few seconds longer. I sighed at the dilemma, and then said, "One."
"Hm... I don't know if one would be enough," Bella said, and Jacob groaned.
"You really are going to stretch this out, aren't you?" Jacob asked and Bella shrugged.
"Well..." she hesitated for a moment, as if deciding which question to voice.
"You said you knew I hadn't gone into the bookstore, and that I had gone south. I was just wondering how you know that."
"Good question," Jacob chuckled. "I bet he's wishing that he didn't let you ask it now."
I glared out the windshield. Here was another question that revealed nothing on her part, and too much on mine.
"I thought we were past all the evasiveness," she said, her tone critical and disappointed.
How ironic. She was relentlessly evasive, without even trying.
"Well, it beats being purposefully evasive," Bella said defensively and Jacob laughed at that and the face she was making.
Well, she wanted me to be direct. And this conversation wasn't going anywhere good, regardless.
"Fine, then," I said. "I followed your scent."
Bella smiled because he answered honestly again.
I wanted to watch her face, but I was afraid of what I would see.
Jacob chuckled at that.
"Um... that wasn't really that funny," Bella said to him.
"Sorry... it just sounded so human," Jacob said and that got a smile out of Bella.
Instead, I listened to her breath accelerate and then stabilize. She spoke again after a moment, and her voice was steadier than I would have expected.
"And then you didn't answer one of my first questions..." she said.
"Ha... I knew you wouldn't stop at just one," Jacob said.
"Well at least this isn't a new one," Bella shrugged looking amused. "I must be thinking that I have to get answers out of him as long as he's being honest with me..." she added thoughtfully, and she was now frowning. It was sad that her book self really had no idea what Edward was thinking... or how much he really cared about her.
I looked down at her, frowning. She was stalling, too.
"Which one?"
"How does it work - the mind reading thing?" she asked, reiterating her question from the restaurant. "Can you read anybody's mind, anywhere? How do you do it? Can the rest of your family...?" She trailed off, flushing again.
"I don't seem to recall you asking him all that," Jacob said and Bella shrugged, laughing again.
"That's more than one," I said.
She just looked at me, waiting for her answers.
And why not tell her? She'd already guessed most of this, and it was an easier subject that the one that loomed.
"But I want to know about the one that looms," Jacob grumbled. "Stupid bloodsucker allowing her to stall."
"No, it's just me. And I can't hear anyone, anywhere. I have to be fairly close. The more familiar someone's...'voice' is, the farther away I can hear them. But still, no more than a few miles." I tried to think of a way to describe it so that she would understand. An analogy that she could relate to. "It's a little like being in a huge hall filled with people, everyone talking at once. It's just a hum - a buzzing of voices in the background. Until I focus on one voice, and then what they're thinking is clear. Most of the time I tune it all out - it can be very distracting. And then it's easier to seem normal," - I grimaced - "when I'm not accidentally answering someone's thoughts rather than their words."
Bella smiled again, imagining Edward when he was first turned doing just that. For some reason... though she knew it wasn't right, she imagined Edward as a little boy. Perhaps it had something to do with the fact that it was associated with him learning something as he would when taking his first steps or talking for the first time. She could also picture a vague image of Carlisle, Edward's father, helping him learn how to work though this.
"Um... what's so amusing about that?" Jacob questioned her when he noticed the look in her eyes.
"It's nothing," Bella shook her head and motioned for Jacob to keep reading.
"Why do you think you can't hear me?" she wondered.
I gave her another truth and another analogy.
"I don't know," I admitted. "The only guess I have is that maybe your mind doesn't work the same way the rest of theirs do. Like your thoughts are on the AM frequency and I'm only getting FM."
Bella frowned at that, it made her sound like a freak.
I realized that she would not like this analogy. The anticipation of her reaction had me smiling. She didn't disappoint.