Nick nodded, but didn’t answer.
“Between us, your studies, and your job,” Spencer said quietly, “you’re running yourself into the ground.”
Nick still said nothing. What could he say? He certainly couldn’t argue.
“I worry about you,” Spencer went on. “I don’t want to see you carrying the weight of the world around on your shoulders like this. I mean, you just had a holiday recently, and you’re still—”
“I didn’t.”
“What?”
Nick swallowed. “I didn’t have a holiday. The trip to Spain, it . . . it never happened.”
Spencer was silent.
Nick took a deep breath. “I told you that because I was freaking out. I kind of, I guess, just lost it for a while. We were getting so close, and I didn’t know what to make of it. So it was just a convenient excuse.”
“I see.” Spencer’s tone offered nothing. Hurt? Angry? Concerned? Nothing.
“I’m sorry I lied about it,” Nick said. “I don’t . . . that’s not something I usually do. I just panicked, and needed to buy myself some time to figure out what was going on.”
“You don’t have to apologise,” Spencer said softly, and squeezed Nick’s hand. “What did you do during that time, though?”
“I worked.” Nick turned his hand over under Spencer’s. “A lot. More than I have in a long time. Which is, I’m sure, part of why I’m so exhausted now.”
“I have no doubt. And now I really think you need that holiday.”
Nick said nothing.
“I mean it, Nick. I don’t like seeing you this way. Promise me you’ll think about doing something, giving something up so you can be happy.”
“I will,” Nick whispered. He stretched his neck, muscles even stiffer after this conversation.
Good sub that he was, Spencer immediately picked up on it. “You want me to work on that shoulder?”
Relieved to be inching back onto more comfortable ground with Spencer, Nick nodded. But then he grimaced as he pressed his fingers into his neck. “I shouldn’t be this sore. Something must be wrong with my technique. My muscles shouldn’t tighten up like that.”
“They shouldn’t, but they obviously do. I can try to help.”
Nick’s stubborn Damn it, I’m fine side tried to protest, but what the hell. Regardless of why he was tense and stiff, the fact was his boyfriend was offering a massage.
He smiled at Spencer. “Okay.”
“It’ll be best if you lie down.”
Nick arched an eyebrow. “Bed?”
Spencer swallowed. “That would be best. I’ll get some oil and towels.”
“How far do you want me stripped?”
“Want? All the way. Need . . . I’d start in the small of your back.”
“For my shoulder?”
“It’s all connected. Sometimes the tension’s not all where it hurts.”
“As good an excuse to get your hands on my arse as I’ve ever heard,” Nick teased and headed to the bedroom. He stripped completely, largely for Spencer’s benefit, and lay flat on his belly, then supported himself on his elbows. That made a vertebra in his upper back pop, and he groaned.
Spencer came in from the bathroom, two large towels in one hand, and a bottle of massage oil in the other. He paused briefly, eyes trailing over Nick, and Nick smiled, flattered that the view could stop Spencer dead in his tracks.
“Okay.” Spencer shook himself and toed off his shoes before he climbed on the bed, too. “Lift up, please.” He slid one of the towels underneath Nick, and placed the other to the side, then opened the bottle and poured some oil into his palm. It smelled of herbs and almonds, an unusual combination, but oddly soothing. “It might hurt a bit,” Spencer said, “but if it hurts bad, let me know.”
“You bet.” Nick placed his forehead on his folded arms. “I don’t like pain.”
Spencer’s hands touched him in the middle of his back, the oil skin-warm. He shifted on the bed, and Nick realised Spencer was straddling him. He didn’t like the feeling of being trapped or immobilized, or really any kind of restraints, but Spencer wasn’t putting any weight on him, so Nick closed his eyes, slowly released his breath, and made himself relax. He trusted Spencer. If this got uncomfortable or he started to freak out because he thought he was being held down, Spencer would let him up without a second’s hesitation. Nick would be fine.
Spencer’s hands slid from Nick’s shoulder down towards his arse. Nick tensed, but Spencer stopped before he actually reached the glutes, pressing both palms in left and right of the spine. Sliding them up, his fingers splayed along Nick’s sides, moving and squeezing and pressing upwards. The touch was soothing and tender, yet Nick felt the strength in Spencer’s hands and arms, and he groaned with pleasure when slowly, some of Spencer’s warmth transferred to him. It was just blood flow, but within a few minutes, he felt hot and flushed, and at the same time, calm and boneless.
Once Nick’s body had relaxed a bit, Spencer moved up, sitting over Nick’s hips while he slid his hands higher.
“I’ll look into your shoulders now.”