When the Heart Lies

Chapter 20





The cooler weather confined Xavier and his morning routine to the breakfast nook. The fall leaves and the shimmering sunlight on the calm water contrasted the glare of the summer sun and hectic boating traffic of the season. He sat, gazing out at the lake. In his relaxed position, he appeared peaceful. With all family members safe and accounted for, his cell phone sat on the table beside him, silent. He seem to be unaware of Jonathan entering the kitchen until he spoke.

“Good morning, Xavier.” Jonathan poured himself a cup of coffee and topped off Xavier’s before sitting with him at the table.

“Morning. I was hoping I’d catch you before I went out. Angela’s ready to go to rehab. In Texas. From what her doctor says, the treatment is the best money can buy. The hospital staff is arranging for her transportation. She’ll leave the day after tomorrow. I’ll join her the day after Kinsley comes home.”

Jonathan nodded. “I’ll make the arrangements. Perhaps you could vacation there and take some time for yourself. Any business could be done remotely.”

“So, you’re telling me to get the hell out of town and not get in the middle of anything?”

“Precisely.” Jonathan was indispensable. When Xavier needed to hear the truth, he’d always deliver.

“I’ve been thinking the same thing. This time, if Nick and Kinsley are going to try to make their marriage work, I need to step back. I can’t be the confident shoulder for Kinsley to lean on. That shoulder has to be Nick’s. Well, she should be home tomorrow or the day after. We’ll have a small dinner here for her homecoming.” His cell rang, and he picked it up, checking the caller ID before answering.

“Good morning, Olivia. How are things going down there?”

“Well, everything appears to have happened just as Kinsley said. Jackson’s bringing her in today. What the DA does with the case is out of my hands.”

“I understand. I’m glad Jackson agreed to stay. I didn’t want a total stranger with her.”

“Well, I’m sure they’re far from strangers at this point. I hope you know what you’re doing. Jackson’s in love with her, you know. Nick will be lucky if she comes home at all.”

“I had my suspicions about his attachment to her. She’ll come home, though. How long she’ll stay is still a mystery. I suppose a lot will depend on how she and Nick come together after all this time.”

Nick came into the kitchen as Xavier’s call ended.

“Nick. Just the person I wanted to talk to. When Kinsley comes home, I want to have a small family dinner for her. I thought she’d want to visit with Mia, too. That is, if she doesn’t know about the two of you. Would you mind calling and inviting her? It’d be better if Mia heard from you that Kinsley’s coming back.”

Nick took a long sip of his coffee. “Just invite her. What difference will it make who she hears it from?” He turned and left.

~ ~ ~

When Kinsley and Jackson returned to the hotel from the police station, she went to the balcony, finally clearheaded enough to take in her surroundings. The penthouse suite was spectacular with a breathtaking view of the Atlantic. The boats were alive, festive, and the people on the beach were oblivious to the tropical dreams they painted for the onlookers. The day was one of the longest of her life, yet the sun was just setting. She should be exhausted, but her only need was for a long, hot bath, room service, good wine, and some easy company. The questioning at the police station was grueling and long, but the detectives were kind and not overly suspicious considering she had been the victim. Still, it wasn’t without guilt that she relayed the story several times. Jackson tried to explain that in a situation like this, she was doing the best for all concerned: her family, and herself. She resolved to buy it.

Jackson sized up the generous amount of boxes and bags Xavier sent. “Think he thought to send me clean underwear?” He had a doubtful smirk on his face. “I’m wearing the ones the hotel sent back from the cleaners this morning.”

She pursed her lips and mockingly said, “I’m sure I could find something for you.”

His full lips gathered to one side. “Sorry, nothing you have could hold me.” His eyes twinkled, but he managed to avoid the big wink. “I saw a men’s shop downstairs, I’ll pick up some things while you’re in the bath, if you’re okay with me leaving.”

“That’s fine, but be sure to come back. New clothes don’t count unless you show them off to someone when you get them.”

He peered around the corner. “I vaguely remember the customary post-shopping torture from living with Scar.”

She laughed, flipping her hair over her shoulder with the swing of her head. “Well, since you’re not my uncle, maybe we can speed up the process. I’ll just show you the stuff as I wear it. If something catches your eye, you can take a closer look. You’re free to take a little time shopping. I’m going take a long bath and bask in this luxury.” The relief of seeing for herself that Max was safe lifted the cloud of doom that blanketed her for months.

He studied her.

“What?” she asked.

“If it makes you this happy to take a bubble bath, there’s no end to the pleasures lying ahead for you in a place like this. Lock the door behind me.” He pushed himself from his position in the door frame that had afforded him an optimal view and headed down to the lobby.

With soft music playing in the background and candles lit, it was easy to put the last few months behind her and forget they ever existed. It was just as easy to pretend there was no future waiting for her. For now, at least. Scales of hardness were shedding from her interior, as well as her exterior. She was beginning to believe, that when she stood up from the bath, she might actually resemble a woman again. She toweled off, wrapped the huge cotton hotel robe around herself, and dried her hair, taking care to pat the waves into shape. That’d be the extent of her styling.

She heard Jackson come in and hollered passed the crack in the door. “I’ll be out soon. Did you get everything you need?”

“Got it. Do you want me to order room service?”

“Sounds great. Get me something decadent and messy. I want to eat with my hands and need to lick my fingers when I’m finished. A culinary experience for those who have been force fed farm food for nearly six months.”

Jackson shook his head and laughed softly. “So, she wants a big, fat, greasy cheeseburger and fries,” he whispered.

She slipped the champagne gold silk chemise over her head and let the fabric fall, savoring the sensations the silk brought to her still sensitive, freshly bathed skin. The chemise was much too short for dinnertime comfort, but the matching robe was knee length.

After stepping into some skimpy silk panties, she slid her hands up her thighs and over her body. Xavier had thought of every need. She slipped her feet into the matching low-heeled slippers.

Jackson knocked softly on the already opened door. “Room service has arrived. Dinner’s out on the terrace.”

She smiled. When his wandering eyes complimented her, her thick dark lashes lowered toward her warm cheeks, which were surely red, and then raised again. By the time her eyes reached his, she deemed the deep connection kindred.

The terrace was inviting and intimately lit by the multitude of hotel lights on the beach. The waves echoed from below, and the temperature wasn’t too warm—the perfect night. When Jackson revealed the cheeseburger under the dome, she smiled and laughed softly.

“Perfect, just what I wanted. Only one thing could’ve made it better.”

As she spoke, he lifted the cover off a small plate, revealing several strips of bacon. She tilted her head to the side and looked at him in an odd way. “Are you for real? I’m beginning to wonder just how closely you were watching me.”

“Almost nonstop. Does hearing that bother you? We can talk about anything. I’m free to tell you everything now.”

Caught smack dab in the middle of a big juicy bite of her burger, she looked up. Waving her hand in circles around her mouth, she signaled a reply would follow. She furrowed her eyebrows, intent on finishing so she could get her words out, but first a few moans erupted instinctively from the pleasure of the tasty burger. She dabbed at her mouth with her napkin.

“I’m sorry. I’ve been told by some I eat as if I’m in love with food. I’m not.” She waved her hand over her mouth again. “I’ve just always had this oral thing.”

Jackson leaned back in his chair with his hand propped at his mouth. She could make out the smirk beneath.

He reached his hand around the back of his neck and massaged the nape before glancing up again with a flirtatious smile. “An oral thing. Yeah, I suffer from the same affliction. It can be hell to keep satisfied.”

His animated response brought to her attention what she’d said. “You’re incorrigible. Look at you, sitting there amused at my expense.” She tried to refrain from letting out bits of laughter, shook her head, and took another bite, smaller this time. When she finished, she mocked herself with a seductive show of licking her fingers. “So, how long have you been watching me?”

“Since you arrived in Orangevale, and more intimately since you left Lakeside.”

She hesitated, appearing thoughtful. “Wayde found a listening device the morning he took me. Was the bug yours?”

“Yes, we thought the audio was necessary.”

She nodded, processing and accepting the fact she had been secretly listened to. “Wayde thought Angela had it planted. He didn’t trust her, he said as much. But he had a thing for her, that was obvious. He became crazy angry when he thought she betrayed him.”

“You found out about Angela?”

“Yesterday morning was the first time he used her name. I don’t believe she set up the kidnapping, though. I can’t imagine her involved in any of this. I didn’t want to say anything to anyone until I spoke to her.”

“That’s very generous, but you may never get the chance. She had a stroke and is unable to speak.”

Kinsley’s head shook slowly as she lowered her eyes. She didn’t want to imagine Angela in such a way. “That’s awful. I guess we’ll never get the full story.”

“Kinsley, she betrayed your entire family. She took advantage of your personal and emotional weaknesses. Why would you just forget it?”

“Because some things are better left in the past, and most mothers will do anything to keep their families happy and safe. We all have secrets, and they aren’t for someone else to tell. I’ll try to forgive her. Besides, doesn’t she suffer now anyway?” She got up and walked to the terrace banister. Her mood slumped.

He followed, placed his hand on her shoulder, and took her hand with the other. “Any secrets you need to unburden yourself of would be safe with me. You’d be safe with me.”

She whipped around to face him. “You say those things, but you have no idea the burden you’re asking for. It’s easy for me to pretend things could be different. But pretending can only go on so long and then—reality check. You’ll see me for what I am. Once that happens, you’ll no longer find me so pleasant to be with. I refuse to commit to loving a man again. I’ve taught myself to love like a man, in short bursts of passionate pleasure. That’s what fills me now. Romance and forever? Those things are for fairytales.” She turned from him, knowing she’d already breached her refusal to love him.

He countered her words, crossly. Just inches from her face, his pointed finger punched the air as his voice raised in genuine anger. “You act like loving someone is a choice. The fact is you’re afraid of love, so you take what’s convenient. Or what you contrive because you think you can control the outcome. Even worse, you cling to a love built on your own insecurity. A love that is very, very, messy.” His words stabbed her to the bone like a carelessly injected needle. She slunk back against the banister, stunned.

“How dare you say those things to me? You comprehend nothing of whom or why I love.”

He turned from her, putting distance between them and then bounded back. “I comprehend there’s a closet full of clothes and jewelry from a man who’s been obsessed with your safety! And that man isn’t your husband.”

He didn’t see it coming when she slapped his face full on.

The heat of rage prickled her face. “Xavier is a respectable man! He wanted me to be comfortable, and he wanted Nick and me to enjoy our time together. Why do you have to make it something dirty when it was done out of pure kindness? This stuff is nothing to him.”

He waved his hand toward the bedroom. “Because, I’m not stupid. He did all of that without asking for as much as one size. Do you want me to show you how a man knows a woman’s size without asking?”

She stood with contempt in her eyes, and did not move when he deliberately took his time closing the distance between them. His face came close to hers, and his heat warmed her skin, leaving the surface tingling with the expectation of touch. Still, she didn’t move. She didn’t want to and couldn’t bear to. Her breath quickened when his fingers trailed up the side of her thigh like feathers. With his other hand laid gently on her throat, he traced the outline of her mouth and chin with his thumb. Irregular wispy strokes of his lips highlighted the route his thumb had taken. She absorbed his scent and committed to memory the texture of his lips against her skin as they moved over the curves of her collarbone and shoulders. She gasped when he moved to her silk covered breast, and his hand slid beneath to grasp one fully.

“Perfect C cup—34 C to be exact.” His whisper was raspy and provocative as he slipped his hands around her waist and over her firm round bottom. “Size 8—6 in a dress.”

The sliding of his hand over her ass warmed her, making her twinge. She squeezed her legs together. He pressed firm against her, and her body responded to his, or was it his to hers? Short gasps, she struggled to hold back, seeped out, spiraling into delicious whines of pleasure. Unrelentingly, he seized her mouth. The slight involuntary parting of her lips welcomed him in, and he entered without hesitation and with intimate familiarity. The balmy hand still cradling her bottom slid downward and hitched her thigh up, thrusting her firmly against the banister. She wanted desperately to spread her legs, so he could fall into the groove, and be welcomed full on. Instead, she choked back choppy pants that begged for him. He drew his lips from hers and probed the depths of her eyes. By surprise, he bent down, leaned his shoulder into her belly, and grabbed the back of her thighs. Then he scooped her up and carried her to the bedroom.

He tossed her down onto the bed and stood at the end of it. Keeping his eyes locked with hers, he pulled his black T-shirt over his head. Shadows of natural light seeped though the patio door creating hills and valleys amidst the heavy musculature of his broad suntanned chest and massive arms. With one hand, he loosened the tie to his cotton pajama pants and let them fall. Every inch of his body was sculpted and hard. His erection was large, swollen, deeply veined and, beautiful.

Her center pulled and ached in want of him. She lifted herself to her knees, moved toward his magnetic stare, and swept the chemise over her head. She shivered and her nipples tightened when the silk slid across them exposing her breasts: perfect, full, and natural. His lips parted and hung open-mouthed at the sight of her. She laid her hands delicately against his chest, balancing herself, as her lips passionately, yet slowly, explored, kissed, licked, and nibbled. Her hands moved smoothly over his chest, trailing the unbroken flow of ripples down his abs, and fell on the firm small muscles leading to his groin. She pulled him in and laid her cheek against his low belly. The tip of her tongue tasted and licked. She wrapped her hand tenderly and firmly around his penis, sliding her thumb over the pearl of sweetness at the tip. She took only the head into her mouth and swirled her tongue slowly as she slid it back out.

A whine of carnal pleasure escaped him. She then took him fully into her mouth to taste and devour. Perfect. She wanted to make love to him that way. His grunts and moans of ecstasy spurred her desire. When he grasped her hair gently at the nape and drew her face upward, she saw the need heavy in his eyes and fell back onto the bed. His forearms caught his weight at her shoulders when he followed her down. His mouth came down on hers, possessing her fully. She surrendered, pulling him in as she arched to meet him with silent pleas.

He took his mouth from hers, tugging gently at her lower lip as they parted One hand remained tangled in her hair with his forearm anchoring him. The other slid sensuously down into the heat of her sex, and she pressed into the palm of his hand wanting more. He drew hard on her breast and teased her with soft bites that ended with the light sliding of his teeth off the tip. A cool silent whistle of air blown from his lips hit the wet nipple, and it tightened to an ache. He moved to the other. She pleaded again, without words, for him to enter her.

A low organic growl escaped him. “Not before I taste you.”

The skimpy panties pulled away effortlessly, and his hot tongue slit her open. Pleasure was an exquisite pain, released as she cried out. Sliding his tongue upward, he drew her into his mouth, sucking and swirling in the rhythm of a passionate kiss that mimicked lovemaking. Her body trembled as her muscles tensed and tightened beneath the expert manipulations of his red-hot mouth. Relentless, he continued to draw and pull until her orgasm came and died to a dull throb.

He kissed her aching flesh sending aftershocks though her body. “You’re delectable.”

“Jackson, please. She cried out, whimpering breathlessly. “I need you.”

His forearm slid under her inner thigh, he hoisted her begging sex to his waist, and surged into her with a long grunt of satisfaction. The slant he’d put on her hips left her bracing her hand against his chest with an outstretched arm, so she didn’t flip over. He held himself there, and she savored the fullness of the connection, the bond. Slowly, they kissed and began to move in unison exploring each other’s bodies until urgency overtook them, and they began to moved together, hard and fast, eager to meet the other completely. As their climaxes drew close, she watched him watching her. Their movement slowed to deep long thrusts. They came hard and seamlessly, together.

He held her, positioning her face close to his. With steamy breath, he whispered into her ear. “No woman has ever weakened me the way you have.”

There was something in the way he said the words. They broke her ability to distance herself from him as she had planned. Neither could move nor bring themselves to part. He pulled her body close and rolled with her, so she was lying limp next to him. After brushing her hair to the side, he tilted her face up and laid a delicate kiss on her lips. They burrowed together. Their legs wound like pretzels, and their arms wrapped around each other tight. She fell off to sleep straight away. Within moments, he followed.

When the sun rose and she woke, nestled and secure in his arms, her heart broke. She didn’t want to face him, knowing she had to leave. At any other time in her life, she would’ve been selfish and turned herself inside out to experience the kind of love he’d shown for her. She would’ve allowed him to embed himself in the chaos of her life, but she couldn’t let him get involved. After all, she’d already wreaked havoc in so many lives: Max’s, Nick’s, and—. Jackson stirred and pulled her closer. He looked wonderful, masculine, and in need of a morning shave.

When he opened his eyes, they filled with light. He brushed the hair from her forehead and kissed it. “Good morning, beautiful.”

She snuggled closer and started to say good morning, but he put his finger to her lips.

“Before you say anything, I want to apologize. I was a being a jealous bully last night. I should’ve never said those things.”

“Bullying? Is that what you call what you did?”

His face bunched. “What?”

“Reducing someone’s will so completely it becomes your own?”

“I hadn’t planned on doing all that, but it seems to have worked out for me.” He smiled.

The reflection they saw in each other’s eyes when they made love, relishing every moment, every touch, was love—the way love should be.

Jackson made plans for their entire day and evening, leaving her with nothing to do, but enjoy their time together and transition back to normality.

~ ~ ~

When she finished dressing for their outing on the pier and came out onto the terrace, he nearly choked on his coffee. Her chestnut hair provided a beautiful contrast to the sexy, yellow, halter sundress she wore. Smiling, her cheeks were tight and burning from the anticipation of spending the day with him. He set his coffee down and absorbed her image.

“Wow, getting away from the grove becomes you. Come sit with me. Scar’s stopping by. She’s picking a couple things up for me and bringing my more appropriate vehicle for driving a stunning woman around. She’ll take the truck back to my house. After we go out tonight, we can ditch this place and stay there.”

His last statement took her by surprise. She was going to say she was leaving, but he interjected at once.

“I’d just like to be able to picture you there once you’re gone.”

She lowered her eyes and nodded as she sat down. “I can’t wait to see Scar. I like her.”

“She likes you, too.” He poured her some coffee from the carafe and slid the cup toward her.

The room phone rang. Being closest, she picked it up. “Hello?”

“There’s a visitor for Mr. Pierce, may we send her up?”

“Visitor for whom?” She was confused, thinking of Dr. Pierce.

“Jackson Pierce.”

She peered over at Jackson. She knew almost nothing about him, including his last name. “Yes, of course, send her up.” They’d have all day to talk. Besides, she’d had the idea that the more she found out about him, the more she’d love, and leaving was going to be hard enough already. When Scar knocked, she hurried to the door and opened it. Scar rushed into her arms and hugged her. She hugged her back. It seemed the most natural reaction in the world.

“I’m so glad you’re okay. I was so worried,” Scar said.

They went out to sit with Jackson.

Scar stared at the two of them with a quizzical eye. “About time you two bedded down.”

The three of them burst into laughter at Scar’s never-ending, blunt honesty.

“Someday you’re going to meet someone, and payback is going to be my mine,” Jackson said, giving her a promising nod.

She flashed her eyes and shrugged him off. “Don’t worry, I’m not going to hold you up all day with a million questions. I got the whole scoop from Jim.”

“Jim?” Kinsley and Jackson said in unison, eyeing each other.

“Yeah, when I couldn’t get a hold of Jackson, I went to the café. Jim told me everything.” Scar glanced at her. “Nice job, Rambo. Jim’s a good guy. I like him.”

They sat and talked a bit. Eventually the conversation got around to the fact Kinsley was going back to New York.

“You’ll keep in touch, won’t you?” Scar had the same petitioning face she’d seen on Jackson the first time she met him.

“Yes, I’ll keep in touch ... with you.”

She wouldn’t be keeping in touch with Jackson. From the expression on his face, he got the message, and from the stabbing pain in her gut, she finally got it, too. Now, she needed to accept it.

With eyes lowered, he stood and went to the door. Scar followed. “I’ll walk down with Scar and pick you up in front of the hotel. Okay?” His smiled seemed forced. The door closed behind him.

The fact that she hurt him troubled her heart. After a few minutes, she headed down to meet him.

Jackson looked like a movie star when he rounded the back of the black Cadillac Escalade. The dark glasses and casual, but fashionable, clothes revealed a different side of him. He opened the door, and she got in. When he got behind the wheel, she couldn’t resist teasing him.

“I guess I’m not the only one full of surprises.”

He turned to her with a devilish smile. “How much fun would I be if I were all blue jeans, work boots, and pick-ups?”

She brought her sunglasses down on her nose and peered over them. “Just how much more fun should I be expecting?”

He sucked in a deep breath and exhaled as he pulled out of the hotel portico. “That depends. Are you going to continue to make me feel like I’m sixteen again, all day, with an eternal erection?”