This Star Won't Go Out

That wouldn’t be so bad now.

But . . . the next Thanksgiving, but then all that stuff happened—it’s a whole ’nother story. Next Thanksgiving I spent, I spent my Thanksgiving at home. We were living in France at the time for 2006 and 2007. (Uh, for a whole ’nother story!) And that Thanksgiving I spent my Thanksgiving at home. With this oxygen tube (points to cannula), except you know, a different one, just the whole thing all over the house, just connected to the machine that would make oxygen. And it was way downstairs and my bedroom was way upstairs so the tube would travel the whole ground and my parents would step on it. And it would be funny kind of, like just, you know . . . whatever. But, then, the next Thanksgiving I spent . . . we were in America. We came back to America so that I could go to a hospital that knew more about “cancer health” in children. Um, and then yeah, I spent that Thanksgiving at home in this person’s house we were staying at. I think, I don’t even know. Next Thanksgiving was this Thanksgiving, which is today, so Happy Thanksgiving!

But, yeah I wanted to say like . . . being diagnosed with cancer, you know, I haven’t really had . . . well I’ve been pretty close to dying multiple times, err . . . you know, pretty close to dying. Thought I was like literally . . . last Christm . . . last, um, last December, November. Whoa Really? Last December, November. Oh, yeah, it was like last winter. I was like literally pretty close to dying. And, um . . . so that just makes me thankful for being alive basically. Um . . . huh, you know if I had died that wouldn’t have been cool. Oh my voice is quivering. Uhhh, yeah . . . I yeah . . . I’m just, I’m just glad that I’m alive and thankful for the doctors and for medicine and for, like, oxygen, and for like, you know . . . all that stuff that keeps me from dying. The pills and stuff like that.

Umm, this Thanksgiving is good though, ’cause I’m a little better even though I’m still kind of sick. I’ll still always be kind of sick, but you know, I’m glad that I’m healthy, healthy . . . slightly healthy now. And I’m at home and I have “aliveness” (uses air quotes), and I have my family, and I have nerdfighters and . . . the Internet and awesome friends that I’ve met through the Internet. And I honestly don’t know where I would be if I hadn’t um, had that horrible Thanksgiving where I was diagnosed with thyroid cancer. I don’t know if I would even . . . you know, I don’t know . . . I might have died a different way! Heh, that’s a really happy thought, ha, oh my! . . . yeah, just, um . . .

So, I don’t usually like . . . think, think about what I’m thankful for . . . like, I just kind of sort of think about it. But I really am thankful for . . . just being alive. And I’m thankful for my family because my family is awesome. And I’m really thankful for my friends because they’re really cool even if they’re . . . most of them are not physically present in this world. I mean in my world! In my world, in my town, most of them are in the computer. They’re pre . . . um hmm, most of them are present in this world, I mean in, in, in the world. Oh yeah, this is what happens . . . when you . . . don’t have a point to what you’re saying except you kind of do, but you’re trapped in your thoughts . . .

Alright. I hope you guys have a nice Thanksgiving because Thanksgiving is cool. Just, you know . . . remember that you’re lucky even if you don’t think you are. Because there’s always something you can be thankful for. And, yeah, I know. Okay.





Friday, November 27, 2009 9:17 AM, EST





Happy Thanksgiving, everyone!


It was the best gift of all to celebrate the day all together, enjoying turkey, stuffing, smashed potatoes (we leave the skin on!), sweet potatoes, roasted veggies and the important condiments. We went around the table to say what each of us were thankful for—everything from family, to jobs, to food, to Wii were mentioned!


Esther continues to hold her own. We had a recent scare when the nurses heard skipping heart beats—as many as 5-9 in a minute. But after complete testing by the cardiology and EKG departments, we’ve been told not to worry. Her team of doctors at several hospitals is also meeting in the next 2 weeks to discuss her continued treatment. She’s had more pain in her feet (a bit like having internal blisters), which is a side-effect of the experimental chemo she takes. She started an additional medication for the nerves which is supposed to help manage the discomfort.