So Gone

Baby Mama Drama


Blunt

The next morning me and Mo’ rolled out about ten o’clock. She dropped me off at the Olive Garden where my car was parked and dipped out.

As I was pulling out of the parking lot, my cell phone rang. “Sup?” I answered behind the wheel.

“Damn, Fam, you ain’t gon’ break bread wit’ me for setting up that lick?” asked Deuce speaking in regards to the thing wit’ Millionaire.

“Yeah, I got you, my guy. Let me get back to you in a coupla days,” I said as a call from Chunuchi came through.

“Aight. Holla at ya boy,” he said.

“Fa sho'.”

I ended the call and clicked over to Chunuchi. “Yeah.” My attitude was real foul.

“I’m gon’ need you to come get Devin so I can run to this job interview. I’m tryna get a higher paying job. My other kids are wit’ their daddies.”

“Bitch, you ain’t gotta go to no f*ckin’ job interview. You just wanna run behind some nigga. Prob’ly that bitch nigga, Fatal,” I snapped.

Chunuchi sucked her teeth and replied, “Boy, I don’t have to lie about nothing like that.”

“Hoe, you will lie about what color panties you got on.”

“No, I wouldn’t ‘cause I don’t wear panties. This p-ssy too good to be smothered. You better remember!”

“What I remember is that yo’ coochie was sorry as hell. If I hadn’t been drunk, I wouldna got a nut.”

“What . . . eva. Nigga, you kno’ this stuff had you talking in yo’ damn sleep, so don’t even front. Anyway, you coming to get Devin or what?”

“Yeah, I’ll be through to get him in an hour or so. Don’t worry, you’ll get a chance to let some niggas run a train on yo’ ass.” I hung up before she could respond.

I put in a Jeezy CD and bumped that until I pulled up in Luscious’ driveway. I killed the engine, got out, and used the remote to turn on the car alarm.

“Get the baby ready, I’ma keep her for the weekend,” I announced when Luscious let me in.

“Oh, you can’t even say hello?” She snaked her neck, getting all up close to me in hot-pink booty shorts and a white baby tee.

“Why you all in my space?” I gritted.

“Ebony is sleepin’. Can we make up? I need some real bad; my stuff been tingling all day.” She reached out and touched my crotch. Then she leaned in closer.

I mushed her face when she tried to kiss me. “Shawdy, you got me twisted! I’m not f*ckin’ wit’ you like that no more. From now on, our dealing is gonna be about my daughter, nothing else.”

She stepped back and placed her hands on her hips, and rolled her neck again. “Well, what about the lick I’m working on for you? It’s almost set up.”

I peeped game, she was trying to hold on to me by appealing to a nigga's greed. I was greedy but not mothaf*ckin' needy.

“F*ck that lick. I’m good,” I spat.

“Daddy, don’t be like that. I’m sorry for the way I’ve been acting, but it’s your fault. You shouldn’t have me all crazy about your ass.” She placed the palm of her hand on my chest and gently massaged it.

I knocked her grimy ass dick jacker off of me, and snarled, “Whatever, man. You too much drama; you don’t kno’ how to play yo’ position.”

“Blunt, I swear I won't act up again. Just give me one more chance, Daddy. Please?” she begged, looking at me like she was ready to f*ck my back out. But I wasn't going - - not for the p-ssy trap.

“It’s too late fo’ all of that. You should’ve thought about that shit before you keyed that f*ck shit on my ride!” I spat pointing my finger in her face. I was two seconds from stomping a hole in her ass.

“Baby, I didn’t do it. I swear,” she denied.

“Nobody else would’ve done no shit like that. Especially not Mika, Shawdy one hunnid wit’ hers. And she don't even know where you rest at,” I argued.

“Well, maybe Chunuchi or somebody did it.”

Chunuchi got down like that, but we hadn’t f*cked each other in three years. She didn’t sweat me like that no more, so I discounted her.

“Nah, you did it. Don’t lie, be twenty one about it,” I challenged Luscious.

“Blunt, I’ve done a lot of things, and I kno’ you’ve caught me in a few lies. Fa real, Baby, I didn’t do that. I put that on our daughter.” She put her right hand up like she was being sworn in before testifying in court.

I shook my head in pity. “That just goes to sho’ how lowdown ya ass is. You will lie and put it on Ebony.”

“I'm not lying! Whoever did it keyed some shit on my car too. Why you think I got it repainted? I took it to Mr. Marshall down the street, and he re-painted the whole car.”

I opened the door and looked outside, and the hell if she wasn’t tellin’ the truth. Her car was a shade lighter than it was before. If Luscious was tellin’ the truth, then who could have done the shit? I wondered.

“Let me find out,” I said and closed the door and locked it behind me.

I pulled Luscious into my arms and squeezed her tight. “We gonna have to make this quick.” I kissed her neck and guided her toward the bedroom.

When we both undressed, I pulled out a condom and wrapped up. Luscious went snap!

“What the f*ck you doing? Do you strap up wit’ Mo’?” she asked wit’ her legs gaped wide open.

“Nope, but I'm wrapping up wit’ you from now on.”

She closed her legs and pushed me in the chest. “Get the hell up off me, Mothaf*cka. I ain’t no trick bitch, and you ain’t taking my baby nowhere.”

I didn’t even argue wit’ her.

I bounced on over to scoop up Devin. When I got there, Fatal was kicked back on the sofa like he had moved in. I ignored him, but best believe he was gon’ get it. I swooped my li’l man up and headed back to Mo’s.

Devin said, “Daddy, that man put his thing in Mama’s booty hole last night.”

“What the f*ck did he just say?” I asked myself.

Devin looked over at me. “I seen ‘em. He was doing it to Mama’s booty hole on the couch, and she was calling him Daddy,” he blurted out.

I busted a mothaf*ckin’ u-turn. I was going back and kill that bitch for doin’ that shit in front of my seed!





Steaming Hot


Molaysia

I parked my car in the garage and stepped out, tired as heck. Blunt had really put it down all night long. My kitty tingled as I recalled him thrusting deep inside of me. "Lawd!" I exclaimed, fanning myself.

Leesha’s car wasn’t in the driveway which was a relief because I didn’t feel like answering a bunch of questions. She would have been real upset had I told her who I was really with last night.

I entered the house from inside the garage. I strolled pass the kitchen and saw that it was spotless and that the floor had been waxed. Leesha had done a great job with keeping my house neat and tidy. Once I made it to my bedroom, I saw a note on my bed. Leesha informed me that she and the girl’s were out shopping and that they would be leaving for home in the morning.

I showered and changed into a gray pair of lounging pants and a white tee shirt. I paid my mortgage over the phone and sat on the side of my bed in deep thought. I wanted to call Blunt and check to make sure he wasn’t already up to no good, but I wanted to trust him to do the right thing.

My phone vibrated in my hand and alerted me that I had a picture message coming through. A picture popped up on the screen of Blunt, Luscious, and a baby. The three of them were dressed in matching black and white outfits. The baby wore a pair of black tights with a white dress. Luscious stood over Blunt with her hand on his shoulder as he sat holding their daughter.

A long text message came through next. It read: Dumb Bitch! While you’re walking around with your nose high in the air like you’re that bitch, you need to kno’ that me and yo’ man are steady f*ckin. I could tell you some shit that would have yo’ bougie ass sick, so let me start telling you so you can throw up. I’ve been in yo’ house from the front to the back.

I gasped.

When I caught my breath, a call was coming in. I recognized the number immediately and hesitated before deciding that I had had enough.

“Bitch, what the hell do you want?” I answered. Pure venom tinged my voice.

“Boo, I kno’ that your bathroom is beige and maroon, and your guest bedroom is white with the baby blue comforter and linen. I love that pillow top mattress, too. If you don’t believe that I’ve been to your crib, go look under the bed because I left you a small surprise.” She chuckled before hanging up.

I sprinted through the house like my panties were on fire. I dropped to my knees in the guest bedroom and looked under the bed. True enough, I found a purple c-cup bra and a size 6 matching thong.

Infuriated, I called Luscious back. “Bitch, you have f*cked up now. Sleeping with my man is one thing, but bringing your trifling ass up in my home is way too mothaf*ckin much! So whenever I see you, and I don't care if it's outside of Heaven's doors, I’m f*cking you up.”

“Woo, woo, woo. I'm scared.”

“You might not be, but you'll wish you were. Trust and believe Boo Boo, I'm going to get a piece of that ass for coming up in my house.” The nice girl was gone!

Luscious burst out laughing. “How you like that, Bougie Bitch? Did you think you were the only bitch that knows how to get down and dirty for hers?”

“Uh huh, my neighbor just described your car and told me that she saw you and some other bitch keying me and Blunt’s ride. Your prissy ass is gonna pay for that when I catch you in the streets. You better be able to fight ‘cause I’m gon’ beat you so bad yo’ mammy won’t recognize you.”

I sat my bottom on the floor listening to the simple minded whore. “I bet you I’m not scared,” I said bristling inside.

“I stay strapped and if you so bad, bring yo’ ass back over here right now. I got somethin’ for yo’ ass. Bitch, I got more heat to put on yo’ ass than hell. Now, C’mon!”

“You ain’t gon’ do…” I said before the dizzy ass bat hung up on me.

I dialed Blunt’s number in a tizzy. I was so hot under the collar, my hands shook.

Devin answered the phone. “Let me speak to your daddy.”

“My daddy outside arguing with my mama,” he reported innocently.

“Oh, really?” I was about to blow my top.

“Yep, who is this, Mika?” he guessed incorrectly.

“No, this is Mo’. Why is your daddy arguing with Chunuchi?” I questioned him.

“Cause I told my daddy that my mama was letting a man put his wiener in her bootyhole. Now they outside cussing and fussing.”

“That’s enough, Devin.” I cut him off.

What had come out of his mouth was downright disgusting.

“You want me to take the phone to my daddy?” he asked.

“No, in fact, don’t even tell him that I called. Goodbye.”

I hung up and sat there wondering if Blunt was arguing with Chunuchi because of the filthy things she had let their son see her doing or if his anger was actually jealousy in disguise.

The more I thought about it, the madder I got. It was time for me to take my anger out on one of Blunt’s baby’s mamas.





The Last Straw


Molaysia

Luscious won the prize.

What she did was the ultimate form of disrespect. Then she had the audacity to call me up and gloat about it! Really? As Cuz might say, where they do that?

Right before I walked out of the door in a pair of black True Religion skinny-legged jeans, a black and white baby tee, and a pair of all white Adidas --- my kick me some ass gear --- Leesha called.

I told her the business.

“Oh hell nawl, I’ll be there in ‘bout fifteen minutes. Don't go nowhere without me,” she said.

Leesha had been to jail twice for stabbing a chick at a club and for property damage. She set her ex-boyfriend’s car on fire in the early 2000’s. That girl was a fool for real.

“There’s no way in the hell I’ma let you go over there by yo’ self,” she adamantly stated. “I’m on my way.”

We hung up, and I waited for her arrival.

About twenty minutes passed, my stomach was quivering from tension. I stretched across my bed sideways with a hundred thoughts running through my head. I suddenly heard a loud car horn honking outside. I shook my head and leaped from the bed, grabbed my keys from my nightstand, and headed to the front door. Leesha’s twins met me at the door with a handful of bags.

“Hey, Auntie Mo’,” they greeted in unison.

“Hi.” I rushed passed them and hopped in the car with their mom.

Leesha was sitting behind the wheel ready to go get it popping.

Yo’ Gotti’s tune ‘Go Girl’ bumped from her system as we flew to our destination. Leesha talked trash about Blunt all the way there. She called him everything but a child of God. I didn’t bother telling her that Blunt and I had made up.

I looked down at the speedometer and saw that Cuz was pushing ninety miles per hour. She only slowed a bit when we got off the interstate. She zoomed down the street, our hair blowing in the wind. When she turned into the apartment complex on two wheels, my head hit the passenger side window, but I felt no pain because I was in Angry Black Woman mode.

To my surprise, Luscious was standing in her doorway with some goofy looking bright skinned man when we pulled up. He kissed her on her cheek before strolling to his ride and pulling off.

Luscious waved goodbye to him and looked up and down the street. Three dusty fiends shuffled by staring inside the vehicle at me and Leesha. “Y'all better push the hell on,” she gritted her teeth at them and they kept it moving.

“That's that nasty skank right there,” I pointed up on the porch at Luscious while unfastening my seatbelt with my other hand.

“Go check that hoe,” Leesha gassed me up. She put her car in park and murdered the engine. “And you better beat her ass, Mo.”

I got out of the car and started toward her. Her facial expression told me that she knew exactly who I was. She stepped out of the doorway to confront me.

“You gotta be stupid to bring yo’ ass to my crib. You already done keyed my shit up, and I’ma make sure I tell Blunt that you keyed his up, too.” She made a fist and stood staring at me.

“Steal on that bitch! We didn’t come to this mothaf*cka to talk,” my cousin yelled from the car. I glanced over my shoulder and saw her getting out of the car kicking her shoes off.

I turned back to Luscious and her fist connected with my right eye. I stumbled back from the power behind the blow. The hood rat had a punch like a man, but I was not to be deterred. I had come for a piece of that ass, and I wasn't leaving without it.

In my eagerness to go in her jaw, I swung so hard that I missed her completely and fell to the ground. Luscious kicked me in the side.

“Oh, you got me messed up. I’m about to beat yo’ ass like it's a f*ckin’ drum stick,” Leesha screamed, running towards us in my defense.

I looked up and all I saw was Cuz hammering Luscious with both fists. Luscious was matching her blow for blow until Leesha snatched her by her long weave, wrapped it around her hand, and pulled her down to the ground.

I got up and jumped in.

Leesha moved out of the way and told me to handle my business.

I had a slight height and reach advantage over Luscious, but the heifer was strong as heck. We traded punches and tussled in the front yard like two wildcats.

Somehow she slung me to the ground and was able to get on top of me. “Flip her!” shouted Leesha.

I arched my back and swung my hips at the same time, tossing Luscious off of me. Then I scrambled on top of her and pounded her in the face as hard as I could. She wiggled her way from under me, grabbed me by the throat, and had me down trying to choke the life out of me.

I felt her body weight fall off me all of a sudden. I gazed upward and saw Leesha with a crowbar in her hand hitting Luscious in the back with it. I hopped to my feet and snatched the object from Leesha.

“Girl, don’t kill her. Let’s just leave. I didn’t come over here for this. This will land both of us a seat in the county jail.”

“F*ck that, this bitch don't know who she's f*cking with!” Cuz was huffing and puffing.

An older woman came charging out of the apartment next door, threatening to call the police. That got our attention.

“Cuz, I think we better get in the wind,” Leesha said. “You’re lucky, bitch,” she hurled at Luscious, then we hurried away from there.

After the whooping Leesha put on Luscious, I knew Luscious wouldn’t come to my place again. If it had not been for my cousin, I probably would have been the one laid out because that thang had some power behind those licks she was swinging. I rubbed my head and thanked Leesha for coming to my rescue.

“Girl, you kno’ I got yo’ back,” she said.

I was shocked at the way I was acting and the confusion I was being drawn into. I had never attacked anyone before in my life. I didn’t even indulge in that type of behavior. I would have to make some serious choices before I was confined in a cell over some man that wasn’t even worth it.