Chapter 23
I tried to digest what he'd just told me. "What do you mean they didn't exist?" I said.
"It was all a big show," he said. "The torn clothes, the fake tears. By then, she knows me pretty good. Especially with this friend of mine feeding her information. And she knows I can get a little intense when people I love are hurt–"
I swallowed. "So you loved her?"
He shrugged. "I dunno. Not like that. It's not that she was unattractive—"
"You already said that."
"Alright, you want the truth?" he said. "I didn't see her like that."
"Why not?"
"The truth? There was this other girl, someone I'd met maybe a few months earlier, before everything started to hit. And I couldn’t get this girl out of my head."
Another one? God, how many girls were there? I felt my jaw clench. "You're changing the subject," I said. "What about Brandy?"
Lawton hesitated a half second and then continued. "So that night, after this so-called attack, she wouldn't let me do a damn thing about it."
"Like what? What'd you want to do?"
"Find those guys, take care of it."
"How?" I asked.
He shrugged. "I had a few ideas."
From the tone of his voice, I could only imagine.
"So what happened?" I said.
"So we go back to her place, and I should've known something was up. The place looked like—" He shook his head. "Well, let's just say it looked like she was expecting company."
"Romantic company?"
"Yeah. And she asks me to hold her, and starts kissing on me, and one thing leads to another."
I snorted. "Yeah. I bet."
His gaze snapped to me. "Go ahead. Joke about it. You and everyone else. I should be used to it, right?"
I felt the color rise to my cheeks. "I'm sorry," I said. "Really." And I was. He might deserve a lot of things, but he didn't deserve ridicule, not for this.
"It's alright," he said. But from the look on his face, it obviously wasn't.
"No," I said, my voice softer now. "It's not. I don't want to be like everyone else. At least, not about this."
"That's the thing," he said. "You're not like anyone else." He reached for my hand. "Not about anything."
I didn't pull away. His hand felt big and strong around mine. I fought the urge to fall into his arms. It always felt so good there, like the home I never had.
"So what happened then?" I said.
"So we had sex. Obviously."
Lots of sex. Although I'd never seen the tape, I'd read plenty about it.
"So a few days later, the footage of it hits all these Web sites, and Brandy's gone." He made a scoffing sound. "To Hollywood, L.A., whatever. Big surprise, huh?"
"What about your friend?" I asked.
"The next time I see him, he's driving a Jag."
"Did you confront him about it?" I asked.
His voice got an edge. "You might say that."
From the look on his face, I probably didn't want to know how the confrontation ended. "So what about Brandy?" I said.
"What about her?"
"You ever see her again? I mean, I read about that thing in Beverly Hills."
He'd left her half-naked in the bathroom of some posh restaurant, then beat the crap out of the bouncers who tried to stop him from leaving.
"Yeah. About that," he said. "Her acting career? It wasn't exactly taking off."
"It seemed like it was going alright," I said.
"Yeah. She had a few parts. Mostly TV. But she wanted something bigger. So I'm at this dinner—some promo thing for a celebrity endorsement. And she corners me in the men's room."
"Seriously?"
"Yeah," he said. "And the way it looks, she's ready for a sequel."
"You're kidding."
"Only half," he said. "Because Brandy's not stupid. She knows damn well I'm not gonna fall for some secret camera thing again. But she still could use the publicity, right? So she gets half-naked and corners me."
"You did say this was in the men's room, right?"
"Yeah. And as soon as I see her, I take off. But she follows after me, making this big scene. And from what she's yelling, it sounds like we just did it right there in the stall."
I'd seen pictures of their confrontation. It didn't just sound like they'd been having sex. It looked like it too. True, Lawton had been fully clothed, but Brandy was wearing next to nothing.
"So I get the hell out of there," Lawton said, "and she's following after me, acting like I'd just done the wham-bam-thank-you-ma'am. And I see all these photographers."
"She set you up?" I said.
"Yeah. Did a good job of it too. Even hired these bouncers to keep me from leaving. She wanted a full spectacle."
"Boy, she sure got it," I said. The whole thing was still legendary. "How come you never told anyone?" I said.
"I did. I said flat-out that none of it happened. You think that got any coverage? Besides, you think anyone gives a crap?"
"They might've," I said, "if you had told the whole story."
"You think anyone wants the whole story?" His voice grew sarcastic. "Besides, she did me a big favor, right? Right after that sex tape hit, I was signed to that reality show."
Oh yeah. Hard World. He'd slept with practically every girl on the set. I felt my forehead wrinkle. Or maybe not. Was that also fake? "About that show," I said. "Was any of that true?"
"Which part?"
"You." I cleared my throat. "And all those girls?"
He'd slept with practically every girl in the household. But it wasn't the off-screen sex that had people watching. It was the fights -- not with him, over him. The show was abruptly cancelled after one girl threw another one through a plate glass window. She'd survived, but the show hadn't.
His gaze drifted from my face and down to his feet. "Yeah."
"Oh."
"You've gotta understand," he said, "everywhere I looked, someone wanted something from me. I guess I was pissed off, maybe a little tired of fighting it." He squeezed my hand. "Until you."
"Why me?"
"What do you mean?"
"Why not Amber? Or Brittney?"
He looked at me. "Is that a serious question?"
Was it? Yeah, I guess it was. "Well, take Brittney," I said. "You obviously liked her well enough a few weeks ago. And Amber too. Why not them?"
He blew out a breath. "Girls like Brittney are easy."
"That's for sure," I said.
"I don't mean that." He shook his head. "With girls like her, I know what I'm getting. And they know what they're getting too."
"Girls like what?"
"You know the type," he said. "Girls from the wrong side of town who pretend to be something they're not."
I felt my body stiffen. That didn't only describe Brittney. It described me, too. Still, I made myself ask, "What's she pretending to be?"
"I dunno. Some socialite, I guess. Take that sorority thing. Get this. She doesn't even go to college."
"Not now? Or not ever?"
"Not ever. And probably never will."
"You're kidding."
"Nope."
"How do you know?"
"One night at my place, she got totally trashed. It was just the two of us, and she started telling me how much her life sucked, and how lucky Amber is, compared to her. "
"So Amber's the real deal?"
He shrugged. "Far as I know."
"Does Amber know about Brittney, that she's just pretending, I mean?"
"She's got to," Lawton said. "I mean, they claim to be in the same sorority. And they've got this sister act thing they do."
I recalled the first night I'd seen them. I knew exactly how far that act extended. I felt my jaw clench. "That's seriously messed up."
"Yeah. I guess."
"But she told that same lie tonight," I said. "About the sorority, I mean. Why would she do that if you knew the truth?"
He shrugged. "She probably forgot. Like I said, she was pretty trashed."
"But why didn’t you call her on it?"
"Because I didn't care. I figured you wouldn’t either. I mean, c'mon, it's pathetic, right?"
In spite of the cold, I felt color rise to my cheeks. I slipped my hand out of his and started walking again.
Lawton fell in beside me. "What's wrong?" he asked.
"Nothing."
Somehow, in the last few minutes, I'd almost forgotten my vow to keep him at a distance. A very long distance. Like from Michigan to the Moon, in spite of the fact we shared a fence.
But after the things he told me, I was having a hard time keeping everything straight. Plus, I was seriously sleep-deprived. It was nearly dawn, and I'd been awake for most of the past twenty-four hours.
"Chloe?"
"Yeah?"
His voice was very quiet. "Will you give me another chance?"