chapter Sixteen
My hand snaked up her body to her throat. I could feel the blood pulsing through the thin skin of her neck as I leaned closer to inhale the scent of flowers wafting from her hair. After everything, I had begun to feel again. I wanted to be with her, to share this with her. My mind thought of her messages and the threat I had received. I was losing my control and I f*cking hated it.
She turned her head slowly to face me, her warm breath blowing across my face.
“I want to hurt you.” I had never felt so open, so raw. She didn’t run, didn’t pull away.
“Maybe I want to be hurt.” The words surprised me. I went rigid against her, wondering if I had dreamed it. My body responded, my mouth finding hers. I slipped my hand into her hair and pulled her lips tighter against mine, unable to get enough of her sweet taste. I wanted to drink in as much of her as possible before she realized I was nothing more than a mistake. My own thoughts cut me like a knife.
“Get on your knees.” I panted and she immediately obeyed, dropping before me. Her eyes floated up to mine as she waited expectantly. I began undoing my belt, watching her. She didn’t move, didn’t look away. I unbuttoned my pants and slowly undid the zipper. “Take me in your mouth.” My hand slipped back into her long silky hair. Her hands slid inside my boxer briefs and slowly tugged downward until I was bare in front of her. She gazed at me, unsure of what to do. I wrapped my free hand around myself and pushed forward, the tip of my cock against her warm parted lips. Her eyes locked onto mine again as her tongue slowly pushed back against me. I shuttered, unable to keep from showing how badly I wanted her. I rocked my hips again. This time, her lips parted and she let me slide easily inside her warm mouth. Her tongue swirled and circled down my length as I continued to push into her. I licked my lips, wanting to taste her just the same. She began to move faster, her eyes not looking away for even a second. I was completely in control, yet powerless against her. She had done things to me that no other woman had. I craved her. “Stop” The word flew out of my mouth breathy and unsure. She didn’t respond at first. I gripped tighter onto her hair, holding her back. I tugged gently, and she slowly rose to her feet. I couldn’t let go, couldn’t trust myself to let her go. I took my free hand and slid it down over the curve of her hip, dipping it between the apex of her thighs. Her breath was ragged.
“Please” she begged and I nearly came at the sound of her voice. I held tightly to her hair, not wanting to give over the only thing I had. Control.
“I like it when you beg.” He chest rose and fell rapidly at my words. I began walking her backwards towards the wall, our eyes locked on one another. Her back hit the wall and she let a small moan escape her lips. I released her hair and grabbed the hem of her shirt, pulling it up roughly over her head. My fingers slowed as I found the button of her jeans and undid them. “You will need a safe word.” I leaned in closer, letting her feel my breath across her lips. Her eyes grew wide.
“A safe word?” She seemed not to understand.
“In case you want me to stop.” A small hint of a smile ghosted across her face. I knew stopping was the last thing she wanted, but she had no idea what was to come.
“I don’t think…” She began. I placed a finger over her lips to keep her from over thinking it.
“It’s just in case.” I reassured her. My breath was ragged and I didn’t know how much longer I could carry on this conversation.
“Flower” She said quickly, her words unsure. I couldn’t help but laugh. I had long associated the smell of flowers with her beautiful body.
“Flower” I repeated. My lips met hers, hungrily. Her body responded, pushing against me. Her hands fell to my waist and she began tugging at my undone belt. I grabbed her wrists and pushed her hands above her head. I leaned closer, capturing her bottom lip between my teeth, tugging gently. “Now the real fun begins.” I had already broken too many of my rules. I needed to regain my power. I pulled her arms higher, feeling for the metal cuffs above her. I slipped her wrists inside them and tightened them enough to keep her captive. I pulled back from her reluctantly, wanting to admire the beauty that was her. I dreamed about what she would look like, chained against my wall. It was better than I expected. Pure submissive perfection. “You look incredible.” I couldn’t hide the smile from my face. She was staring at me, waiting. I felt like she could see into the depths of my soul. I pulled a small cloth from my back pocket and stepped back against her. I kissed her softly as I tied the small scrap of fabric over her eyes. I pulled away, wanting to drink her in. I watched as she tugged gently against the restraints, her chest rising and falling heavily.
“William?” My name rolled off her tongue like silk. I broke myself from my trance and leaned in close enough that I knew she felt my body heat.
“Patience” I whispered in her ear, her body arching at my words. I ran my fingers lightly down the inside of her thigh. She quivered under my touch. When I reached her ankle, I tugged on it gently, pulling her legs wider. I grabbed a shackle attached to the floor and secured it around her. I did the same to her other leg. I took my time running the tips of my fingers back up the inside of her legs, stopping at the apex of her thighs.
“This belongs to me now.” She was damp against me and I used her slickness to ease my fingers inside of her. She was panting. “Tell me that you belong to me.” Her breathing grew more ragged but she didn’t answer. “Tell me!” I hissed, my jaw clenched. I needed to hear the words.
“I belong to you” She moaned, her hips pulling down towards my fingers. I laughed quietly to myself, wondering what I had done to deserve her.
“Good girl” I breathed into her neck as I trailed kisses down her collarbone. I moved lower, her back arched as I reached her chest. I circled her nipple with my tongue then lightly bit with my teeth. She cried out, struggling to free herself. I waited, hoping not to hear her utter the safe word. She didn’t say anything and I continued to kiss my way down her stomach, gripping her hips tightly in my hands. I reached to the small shelf beside me and grabbed one of my favorite toys. I clicked it on and it began to slowly hum. I placed it lightly against her skin, her head jerked down towards it. I could feel her pulse quicken. I slid it up her stomach and around her breast. Her nipple grew tight and budded against it.
“Have you ever played with one of these before?” I asked. She bit her lip and shook her head no. The thought of being her first in so many ways excited me like nothing else. I trailed it back down her abdomen. Her muscles tightened as it tickled her. I kept my eyes on her face as I let it brush against her wet sex. She pulled down on the restraints, the sensation becoming too much for her. “Shhh” I whispered in her ear, not wanting her to hurt herself. I moved it slowly back and forth. Her hips began to rock, matching my rhythm. I hovered my lips above hers, breathing in her quiet panting. “Do you want me to make you come?” Her breathing stopped for a split second.
“Yes” She cried, leaning forward. I pulled back, unable to give her any control over the situation. I slid the toy faster, moving it effortlessly in her own juices.
“Yes what?” I asked as her body writhed against it.
“Yes, Sir” Her moan came out low and breathy. I pulled the toy back, not wanting her to come so quickly. She opened her mouth to protest and I slid the toy inside. She pulled back but her head was against the wall. I pressed my body against hers wanting her to feel what she did to me. Heat radiated from her entrance.
“Deeper” I commanded, pushing against her as I pushed with the toy. She let it slide further inside of her mouth. She took the entire length of it. I slowly pulled back and let it trail down over her heaving chest. She was so eager. As I reached her sex, I let it linger where she needed it most as I pushed against her, slipping myself inside. I wasn’t slow or gentle. Her body began to buck as her walls clenched around me, pulling me deeper inside of her.
I pulled the toy away and gripped onto her hips, holding still.
“Don’t stop” She begged, unable to catch her breath. I rocked my hips towards her and she squeezed me tightly, bringing herself down onto me further.
“Tell me what you want.” I needed to hear her say it.
“I want you.” She was desperate for her release.
“You want me to f*ck you?” I asked as I pulled back and thrust into her harshly.
“Yes” she cried out.
“Ask nicely.” I skimmed my teeth over the shell of her ear.
“Please” She pushed against me.
“Please what?” I asked, pulling my body back from hers, nearly withdrawing completely. I had to force myself to keep any distance between us.
“Please f*ck me.” Her words unraveled me. I pushed back inside of her hard. A low moan escaped her lips and I growled in response, capturing her lips in mine. I wanted to taste every part of her as she came. Her body jerked and tightened around me. I kept pace, wanting to soak up every drop of her pleasure. I came hard inside of her as she pulled me impossibly deep inside of her.
I bent down and unlocked her ankles. She brought them together immediately. At least if she leaves now she knows what she is missing. I stood, admiring her beauty for one last moment, before pulling the cloth from her eyes. I stared past her as I undid her wrists.
“Thanks” She whispered. I found my jeans and turned my back to her as I pulled them on. I felt empty. I walked towards the elevator, the sound of her feet on the wood floor in the distance. We rode down to the next floor in silence. I was so incredibly selfish. I knew she had doubts about me but I chased after her. She never had a choice. She was vulnerable and sad and I knew exactly what to say do to get my way. I felt ill.
As we reached my living space, she headed straight for the bathroom. I didn’t doubt that she wanted to cleanse her body of me. I picked up her phone from the counter and began flipping through the settings absentmindedly. My phone rang and I dug in my pocket to retrieve it. A small folded piece of paper came with it. I threw it on the counter and looked at my phone. Angela was the last person I wanted to talk to but I knew if I ignored her she may just show up. I walked towards my living room, trying to put some more distance between Emma and I.
“What?” I snapped, not caring how she felt.
“What’s wrong with you?” She asked and I didn’t know how to respond. There were too many answers to that question.
“Let’s start with the note.” I hissed, trying to keep my voice low.
William, I don’t know what you’re talking about.” She sounded confused and hurt. I wasn’t going to let her off the hook.
“I’m not the only one who could get hurt if anyone found out about us.” I threatened. I heard her suck in a shocked breath.
“William, I swear. I didn’t do anything.” She was begging me to believe. Emma slowly walked past me to the kitchen. I ran my hands through my hair, wishing I had the strength to keep her out of my f*cked up world. I didn’t have control anymore. Whoever had sent me the note made sure of that. I turned my back to Emma and lowered my voice.
“It’s not a f*cking joke. If you did this I will find out.” I hung up, not wanting to hear anymore of her excuses. If it wasn’t her than I had much bigger problems on my hands. I walked to the fridge, yanking it open to grab a beer.
“What’s wrong?” Emma asked. So naive. My world was unraveling around me and I was going to take her down with me. I was a monster. I slammed the fridge and took the top off the bottle. She stared at me expectantly.
“This is what’s wrong. This is why I came to see you this morning.” I shoved my finger at the note and waited for her to say something, anything. Her eyes danced over the scrap of paper.
“What does this have to do with me?” She asked, confusion twisting her face. “It was that woman wasn’t it? The one I saw you with at the theater.” She looked back at me, not able to hide the hurt from her eyes. “We have to call the police!” I shook my head and took another drink from my beer. There had to be another way out of this.
“It’s not that simple.” Did she not understand that if the police began digging around it would ruin her life?
“What are you talking about? She threatened your life!” She was shouting. This was a side of her I had never seen before. She was worried about me. Maybe she was worried about herself. I took another drink as I thought that over.
“She doesn’t seem to know anything about you.” I reassured her. She looked confused at my words, running her hands through her knotted hair.
“Shit” She muttered, trying to free her fingers. I smiled and pulled open a drawer on the island and pulled out a pink hairbrush, a reminder of Abby. My thoughts never went to her.
“We have to find somewhere safe for you to go tonight.” My stomach panged at the thought of her leaving but I knew it was best for her.
“Why can’t I stay here?” She asked as she brushed the last few tangles from her hair. She wanted to stay. “Never mind” She quickly followed, placing the brush on the counter and standing. I had to swallow hard before explaining.
“It’s not that I don’t want you to stay. I wish I could lock you up and never let you leave.” I had to keep the smile from my face. I very much wanted to do that. “The last place you should be is with me.” The words hurt as they crossed my lips. I walked around the island and placed my hands on her cheeks, stroking her face with my thumbs. My body lit up with the electricity between us. “Why do you think so little of yourself?” Her eyes grew wide and she didn’t answer for a moment.
“Why are you so distant?” She countered and I held my breath as all the reasons flashed across my mind.
“That has nothing to do with you, Emma.” She kept her eyes locked on mine. Her hand slowly lifted and she gently touched her fingertips to my chest. I fought the urge to pull away. I took my hand from her face and placed it on top of hers, and held it firm against me. My pulse quickened.
“You are the only person who has ever made my heart race like this.” I didn’t look away. I needed her to know that. It was probably the most honest words I had ever spoken. I took my other hand and tucked her chestnut hair behind her ear. I swallowed hard at the next words I had to say. “You have to go. It’s not up for debate.” I kept my tone low and commanding. I couldn’t stand if she pushed any further. I wouldn’t be able to make her go.