“Since it’s your birthday I’ll let it slide.”
“Thanks.” He kissed me again, this time letting his tongue linger a bit on my bottom lip. He pulled away, but instead of heat in his eyes and a playful grin, Jackson’s face had a hint of worry.
“What’s wrong?”
He sighed. “I just keep thinking that she’ll be back.”
“Me too. But if she does, then we’ll deal.”
He dropped his forehead to mine. “Thanks for everything. For helping get Ryder settled this week. For helping me.”
“You don’t have to thank me.” I wrapped my arms around his waist, snuggling into his chest. “We’re a team.”
He hummed.
But he didn’t say anything else.
“So what’s new?” Hannah asked me and Leighton. She was sitting across from us in a booth at Bob’s Diner. “You two have been so busy lately we’ve hardly seen you.”
I sighed. “Sorry. Things have just been a little crazy.”
It had been a month since the fishing expedition on Jackson’s birthday. Ryder was getting into a rhythm at school. Jackson was adjusting to being a stand-in parent. And I was doing everything in my power to help them both, which meant dinner with my girlfriends had been skipped—a lot.
Actually, dinners with June and Hannah had been few and far between ever since I’d started dating Jackson. I’d canceled on dinner with them more times than accepted, mostly to spend time with him.
Truth be told, I didn’t really feel like being here tonight either, but the guilt of being a bad friend had eaten away at me. When Hannah had called, I hadn’t been able to say no.
Ryder was sleeping over at the cottage tonight with Hazel, and what I really wanted was to spend the evening with Jackson at the bar, then sleep at my apartment, since we hadn’t been there in forever.
But I also missed the girls, especially Leighton.
“How are things going with Brendon?” June asked Leighton, waggling her eyebrows.
My best friend smiled that dreamy smile she’d been wearing for months. “Amazing.”
“They’re in love.” I swooned, nudging her shoulder with my own.
“We so are.” Leighton and Brendon were nearly inseparable these days, and she’d missed about as many girls’ dinners as I had.
While I hadn’t seen much of Hannah or June, Leighton and I always made time for each other. She knew all about me and Jackson. I knew all about her and Brendon. And I had a hunch that those two would be headed down the aisle before long.
I was overjoyed that she’d found a man who loved her unconditionally. And that she’d found someone to confide in about her assault besides me.
“Aren’t you jealous, Willa?” June teased. “She took your man.”
“No.” I laughed, toying with the paper wrapper I’d stripped from my straw. “I have a man, thank you very much.”
“How are things going with Jackson?” Hannah asked.
“Wonderful.”
“Obviously,” June said, fanning her face. “I mean just look at that man. Those eyes. That ass. He’s so damn hot. I bet he’s good in bed too. God knows he’s had a lot of practice. If there was a guy I wanted to fool around with before finding my husband, I’d pick Jackson too.”
My entire body stilled. “We’re not fooling around. We’re together.”
“Oh, Willa.” She gave me a pitying smile. “Come on. Jackson’s not that kind of guy.”
“What kind of guy?”
“The kind you marry. He’s the one you fuck senseless before you find the guy to settle down with and have kids.”
“What? That’s not . . . no. It’s not like that.”
Somehow in a matter of seconds, she’d cheapened my most special relationship. And she made him out to be some kind of insensitive man whore. Yes, Jackson had experience and I hated thinking about it. But none of that mattered now. It was in the past and his future was with me.
“Have you guys talked about getting married?” Hannah asked.
“Um, no.”
Hannah and June shared a smug look.
“They don’t need to talk about that yet,” Leighton said, coming to my defense.
“Have you and Brendon talked about it?” June asked.
“Well, yeah. But Willa and Jackson are different.”
We are? “Why?”
“Not in a bad way,” Leighton said. “You’re just at a different point in your relationship. Brendon and I are moving at warp speed, talking about getting married and having kids. We both want that. You and Jackson are still getting to know one another. You’re not as serious yet.”
Not as serious? Had she not been listening to me during all of our phone calls when I’d spilled my guts about every tidbit of my relationship?
“We are just as serious. I love Jackson.” I hadn’t told him yet, but he knew. Didn’t he? And he loved me too. There’s no way we could connect like we did and not be in love.
“You can love someone without marrying them,” Hannah said.
“You can fuck someone without marrying them too,” June snickered.
“Stop it. Stop saying f-fuck.”
She rolled her eyes. “Sorry. I didn’t realize we were back in high school.”
“I don’t care if you say fuck.” Gosh, it sounds stupid when I cuss. “I just don’t like you saying it when it comes to me and Jackson. We’re not just having casual sex. We have something special.”
“I’m just trying to be your friend,” Hannah said. “Jackson doesn’t seem like a guy who wants the whole marriage, babies, Sunday-brunch-with-your-parents thing. He’s what, five years older than we are?”
“Six,” I corrected now that he’d had his birthday.
“Whatever. Don’t you think if he wanted to get married, he would have by now?”
The sting of angry—no, furious—tears pricked my eyes. Jackson hadn’t gotten married because he hadn’t found the right woman yet. Me.
I refused to believe anything else.
Why couldn’t my friends just be supportive? Why did they always make me feel ridiculous and na?ve?
I dug into my purse and yanked out some cash from my wallet. We’d ordered, but it hadn’t arrived yet, so I threw it down in the middle of our empty table, then slid out of the booth with my purse and winter coat in hand.
“Willa,” Leighton said. “Wait. We didn’t mean to make you upset.”
I turned around. “None of you know how my relationship works. None of you know Jackson. All you’ve ever made me feel was pathetic for having a crush on him.”
“It is,” June muttered.
Hannah shushed her and Leighton shot her a glare.
“You know what’s pathetic?” I snapped at June, stepping right up to the table. “You. You come here and try to embarrass me with all your talk of sex and fucking. You try to make me feel stupid for loving a man who deserves it. I don’t give a crap what you think about Jackson or me. It’s none of your damn business, so butt out.”
All three faces at the table stared up at me like I’d gone bonkers. My outburst was so out of character it even surprised me a bit.
“He’s the best thing that’s ever happened to me,” I told them. “He might not be ready to get married today, but you know what? Neither am I. And the bottom line is, it is none. Of. Your. Business.”
With that, I spun back around and marched for the door. I wasted no time getting into my car and peeling out of the parking lot, driving straight to the bar.
I drove straight to the man who’d make it all better.
“Hey, babe.” Jackson smiled as I walked through the door. But as I stomped across the room, my shoes crunching peanut shells, his smile dropped. “Uh-oh. What happened at dinner? Did they burn your cheeseburger?”
“No.” I slumped into a stool. “I kind of yelled at my friends.”
He chuckled. “They must have deserved it then. My girl doesn’t get riled up much.”
They had deserved it. Maybe. June had for sure. Except I felt bad for lumping Leighton into the mix, and Hannah had been genuinely trying to give me advice.
Jackson walked around the corner of the bar, taking the stool next to mine. He spun me to face him so my legs were between his.
“What happened?” he asked gently.
“Nothing.” I waved it off. “I don’t want to talk about it.”