We’re a hundred feet apart, separated by a big crowd and four angry security guards. But when he hears me his head snaps up and he looks around the room.
I start inching down the stairs on the opposite side of the stage from the approaching guards, trying to delay my inevitable escorting out.
“You once said that love is the best gift we ever have the privilege to give, and for a long while I didn’t believe you. I thought I did, but I didn’t.”
Josh comes out from behind his table and tries to look over the crowd to find me. He doesn’t see me. The security guards have made it to the stage. My time’s almost up.
“I was afraid. I’m sorry I didn’t see you for who you were. I’m sorry it took me so long. I was scared to tell you. I was scared to say I love you.”
The entire conference center has gone quiet. Everyone has turned toward the stage. Josh has finally seen me. He’s stuck at the back of the crowd, trying to push his way through.
I look over at the guards, they’re only a few feet away.
Well, this is it.
I look back at Josh. “You once said, fate finds you when you least expect it. I didn’t expect to find you. Or to love you.”
Even though we’re far apart I focus on him, on the expression on his face. He’s giving me that smile, the happy, quiet one that he only ever gives me.
“But I do. I love you.”
The big security guard steps in front of me and holds out his hand for the microphone.
My time’s up.
“Josh. If you feel the same, well, I’m about to be banned from the convention, so I’ll wait for you outside. I know I took the long way to get here, the really, really long way to figure this out. But now that I’m here, I hope that I’m not wrong. That by following the stars in my heart, I found you.”
“Ma’am,” the guard says.
I nod and drop the microphone into his hand. My group of teenager friends start to clap and cheer. A few others join in.
Two of the guards take my arms and then guide me down the stairs. I’ve lost sight of Josh.
The guards escort me through the crowd and out the back exit. I’m banned. Prohibited from re-entry. Not allowed back inside.
I nod in understanding.
When they go back in I sit down on the parking lot curb and curl my toes under. It’s really cold in London, in late winter, when you aren’t wearing shoes.
I wrap my hands around my knees and shiver. The sky is a washed out gray, with a tiny patch of blue and a little stream of sunshine just breaking through. The pavement is still wet from a late morning shower and the air smells like wet grass and rain.
I pull my legs closer to my chest. It’s cold.
I drop my chin onto my knees.
Then, I hear the metal door clang shut.
I turn and look over my shoulder. Josh strides toward me. My heart leaps into my throat.
“Hey.” I smile up at him.
He lifts an eyebrow then sits down next to me on the concrete curb. He picks up a strand of my lime green wig and his eyes crinkle. “So random, Gemma. So random.”
I give him an answering smile. “You don’t like it?”
He shakes his head. “I didn’t say that.”
It’s hard to take a full breath. “You didn’t say goodbye. You left, and you’re going to be gone a year and you didn’t say goodbye.”
His brows lower. “What? Who said that?”
“Grim. In your comic, he was leaving for a year and he didn’t let Jewel know that he loved her and—”
“You read my comic?” Josh’s grin spreads across his face.
I swallow. “Mhmm.”
“What did you think?” He looks at me closely, his face only a few inches from mine. The mist from our breath mingles in the air between us.
“I liked it. I really liked it, but I think Grim should’ve told Jewel that he loved her.”
Josh looks into my eyes, then he reaches up and runs his finger down my cheek. “Do you?”
My heart leaps at his touch. “I do,” I whisper.
“Gemma.” He leans forward.
“Yes?” I hold my breath.
“I only left for the weekend. I fly back on Monday.”
“What?” My mind is fuddled with his mouth so close to mine.
“I canceled my tour. I’m staying in New York.”
“Why?” I whisper.
He reaches up and places both hands on my jaw and strokes my skin with his fingers. “I thought we could try making a baby again.”
At his words my heart starts to fill up with so much happiness.
He wipes a tear from my cheek. Then he leans forward and brushes his lips across my skin, over my cheeks, my nose, my eyes. His mouth is warm and gentle. I hold still under him as he trails his lips over my face.
I let out a small sound.
He pauses, his mouth hovering over me, his hands not moving.
“Josh,” I whisper.
Then, he presses his mouth to mine. He sucks on my bottom lip, licks me, tastes me. He pulls me close and says, “I love you, Gemma. I love you.”
And even though it’s freezing out and my toes are going numb, my whole body feels warm and happy. I’m so happy.
I smile against Josh’s mouth.
He takes my lips in his, kisses me, and in his kiss I can feel how much he wants me, how long he’s loved me. Then he says, “Gemma, if you don’t let me strip you down and make love to you in the next five minutes, you and I are going to have problems.”
Exactly thirty minutes later I’m warm and well-loved, curled in Josh’s arms in his bed at the convention center hotel. He strokes his fingers up and down the curve of my spine.
“You figured out I wrote all the quotes?” he asks. His voice is intimate and low in the soft confines of the down-comforter and the dimly lit hotel room.
I turn toward him and run my hand over his bare chest. I don’t think I’ll ever get tired of touching him. “I found your journal in Ian’s office. I brought it with me.”
He gives me a half-smile, then returns to stroking my back.