- TWENTY -
LANE -
Blood. It was splattered across my shirt and covered my hands. Even though I could tell it was mostly from his nose, it still made my stomach turn over. Those suckers really leaked when knocked just the right way. I’d seen it happen and I had been covered in it just like this a time or two, except every other time, a bell would chime or a ref would call for us to separate.
The part that worried me the most is that I hadn’t even fully unleashed. It had been building up to that point though. If he hadn’t passed out so quickly, I would probably still be working him over. Jaxon and Jace could have pulled me away a million times, but my fists still would have sought out his face.
I watched a trail of red liquid glide down my fingers and drip with a small splash on the ground. It hit me that I had done all of that with Raegan standing only a few feet away. She’d had to witness the rage inside of me that I tried to keep calm every single day. Ironically, boxing had helped me control my strength and harness it into something I was really good at. But I needed the restrictions. I craved the rules and the ropes that told me when to go hard and when to pull back. Not this concrete parking lot free-for-all.
I heard the sirens blaring closer, and the anger I felt toward myself reached an astronomical level. I thought I had been thinking of Kate. Of Raegan and Braden. I thought I had been avenging them somehow. But would Kate be proud of me for successfully pummeling the reason she had been taken from me for the first four years of her life if it landed me in jail for assault?
Jaxon shoved tissues and a miniature bottle of sanitizer in my hands and mumbled something about cleaning myself off. I ducked into my car and quickly scrubbed the carnage from my hands. The tissues flaked and it took even more time for me to remove all the pieces than it did to get rid of the blood. I bathed my hands in the sanitizer until the bottle was practically empty.
“I’m f*cked,” I groaned when Jaxon moved to the open window.
“Nah, I think I can handle this. See that guy getting out of the cruiser? He’s put me in handcuffs more times than I can count,” he chuckled.
“Dude, that doesn't sound like you got this. It actually sounds like the opposite, in fact.”
“I used to put some excitement in this boring town for him. He likes me.”
I groaned at his less-than-reassuring words. “Where’s Rae?” I managed to rasp out. I couldn’t look at her earlier… I didn’t want to see the disappointment or—God forbid—fear in her eyes.
“Probably at Jace’s.” He didn't sound too confident in his words and my heart squeezed tighter than my fists. How could one single moment f*ck up everything? Kate, Raegan, and Braden had become everything in my life that I didn't know I wanted. They were my sunrise and sunset—every single day. It was the four of us, and I wouldn’t recover if it became any less than that.
I reached behind me in the backseat, praying for a spare shirt. Thankfully, my gym bag sat on the floorboard so I quickly tossed on an old, sweaty shirt, welcoming it if it meant I could shed the bloody one.
When I exited the car, Adam was pushing up off the ground, holding his shirt up to his nose. Looking at him only caused me more agony and fury. If he made any eye contact with me whatsoever, I’d maul him again. I proceeded to the opposite side of my car so that I couldn't even catch a glimpse of him in my periphery.
“Jaxon Riley… boy, tell me you didn’t do this mess.” The sheriff casually pointed to Adam’s scrawny, crumbled form.
“You know me, Mack, I can never pass up an opportunity to bring some spontaneity to your day,” Jaxon responded with a cheesy-ass grin, and I was baffled by the dynamic between these two.
“Tell me what happened and why I gotta get the damn parking lot cleaned up,” the sheriff’s gruff voice replied.
Jaxon marched toward the older man, and I watched as his body straightened up and began to look serious. At least this wasn't a complete laughing matter to him—I really needed him to help me out here. Adam didn’t move from his spot on the curb when he was caught in the questioning glare of the uniformed sheriff.
After thirty long f*cking minutes, the sheriff, joined by Jaxon, paraded back to stand over Adam, who had finally gotten his nosebleed under control. I moved around the car a little closer, hoping the law enforcement presence would keep me in check.
“You do what he told me you did?” Mack barked down at him.
“Well, seeing as I don’t know what the hell he told ya, I can’t say. But probably.” At least he wasn’t going to backtrack.
“That’s sick,” Mack replied, holding his duty belt. This whole calm, cool, and collected approach baffled me. Not once in New York had I witnessed an officer approach a scene this casually, as if he had all day to chat.
Adam shrugged. “I’ve done worse.” My muscles locked and I called upon every ounce of self-restraint I had ever worked for to help me stay where I was. I spread my fingers out against my legs to keep them from clenching.
I cannot kill him. I cannot kill him. I cannot kill him.
“You ever seen Raegan? If you did, you’d understand,” Adam said as he slowly stood to his feet.
“Ain’t no damn girl worth my son. I don’t care what she looks like or how good she can blow me,” Mack growled. Adam opened his disgusting mouth, and I knew this would be the moment I would get locked away for life. Mack quickly jumped and shoved Adam face-forward against my car before pulling his handcuffs from his belt. “Do not respond to that. You’ve already said enough,” he warned before he began reading him his rights.
Once Adam was properly secured, Mack left him leaning up against the side of my car. Shit, now I was definitely going to have to get another vehicle. I would never look at this one again without thinking of this bastard dripping his blood all over it.
“How the hell am I supposed to explain his busted face?” Mack asked Jaxon while eyeing me.
“We found him that way?” Jaxon shrugged with a smart-ass smirk.
“Boy, you’ve already pulled that one on me before!” He wagged his finger at Jaxon with a smile.
“Come on, give Lane some slack. The f*cker just admitted to conspiring to have his daughter kidnapped,” Jaxon argued.
“Hey! The girl and Raegan were not part of the plan. It was only supposed to be the boy. I’m not going down for all three,” Adam called out.
“Don’t you understand those rights I just told you? Keep your mouth shut, ‘cause you’re just diggin’ a bigger hole for yourself,” Mack hollered back.
“I’m f*cked regardless,” he shrugged dispassionately.
“Not another word about any of them,” I growled.
“I see you’re married.” Adam turned to Jaxon, completely ignoring me. “You’re a good-looking dude, and I’ll bet the Mrs. is smokin’.” Jaxon nodded his head in agreement, but I could see the cautious look on his face, not knowing where this was going. “You would do anything to keep her, wouldn’t you?” Adam questioned.
“If you’re trying to get me to say that I would have my own son kidnapped, so that I could have my wife all to myself, then you can get your f*cking convoluted sense of camaraderie elsewhere, you a*shole,” Jaxon barked. “The day my wife tells me she’s carrying my child, I’ll worship her every move… hell, I’ll be her shadow. When that day comes, I’ll be f*cking thankful for the honor that I created another human being with her. And every day from that day forward will be about them and how I will make them happy—both of them.”
“Damn, you have grown up,” Mack said with a smile. “I almost teared up.”
“Just take him in,” Jaxon said, shaking his head.
“You gonna press assault charges on this guy?” Mack asked Adam, pointing with his thumb at me.
“Will it lessen my charges?” Adam asked arrogantly.
“Not even by a day.”
“Then no. I don’t care for all that extra bullshit. He hits like a f*cking bitch anyway.” Oh, now the big, tough guy is going to come out and play. His pride will get him killed one day, and I won’t be sad about that at all. What did Rae ever see in this guy?
Mack shoved Adam’s body into his beat-up old cruiser and sauntered back our way.
“How’s your mom doing?” he asked, looking at Jaxon.
“Please tell me you aren’t interested in her, too. If one more guy asks me if my mom is single, I’m gonna start throwing punches,” Jaxon whined. That got a small laugh out of me.
Mack shrugged his shoulders coyly. “I’ll see her around.” When Jaxon groaned, Mack turned his attention toward me. “How’s your daughter doing?”
“She’s perfect.”
He nodded his head. “Good… good to hear. That was some tough news, son. Hug em’ all tight tonight.” His words sounded exactly like something my dad would tell me right now, and I reached out to shake his hand in appreciation. “You’ll need questioning, so don’t go headin’ outta town.”
“He used to be a cop, I’m sure he knows the drill, Mack,” Jaxon added.
“Yeah?” Mack’s eyebrows perked up. “Need a job?”
I chuckled and shook my head. “No thanks. After the last four years I’ve had, I look forward to my boring desk job.”
Mack nodded his head as if he understood and then lifted his chin toward Jaxon before walking away. Jaxon feigned a jab at me. “There isn’t anything boring about working at The Riley Group, you ungrateful bastard,” he smirked while rounding the side of my car.
“Thanks, man…” I started. “You really saved my ass. I could easily be sitting in the back of that patrol car right now, so I appreciate it.”
“That f*cker deserved it, and I would have been honored to bail your ass out of jail,” he said with a shrug. We both sat down in the car and I reached out to shake hands with him.
“Let’s head out… I want to get back to my family.”
~~~~~~~
With a new set of clothes on and a small bag packed for Kate, I stormed out of the house and ripped open my passenger door. Jaxon had taken over the driver’s seat, claiming I wasn’t in the right state of mind to handle the roads. My chest was squeezing in on itself, and I couldn’t get my hands to stop shaking.
“Where the hell did she go?” I barked.
“Dude, calm down…” Jaxon tried to placate me.
“No, f*ck that. If this were Emerson, you’d be blowing up! Braden’s terrarium is gone.”
“Oh… okay…” I knew he hadn’t understood my words.
“His favorite thing in the world. If that’s gone, then something’s up. What the f*ck is up, man?”
“Okay, I don’t really know yet. I know that Raegan was upset. Jace and I told her to give you a moment to cool down. Let’s just get back to their house and I’m sure we can figure this all out.”
“You told her to give me a moment?” I bit out.
“Yeah…”
“And she listened?”
“Well, when you weren't responding to her…” he trailed off. Raegan never left anything alone. She always pounced on me to fix problems, right there and then. What was going through her mind? I had been in a state of shock after I beat Adam down, so I don’t remember hearing anybody saying anything to me. I guess Rae could have been trying to talk to me… but I just didn't hear it. There had been blood everywhere, and I just couldn't forgive myself for erupting like that in front of her.
“God, I freaked her out, didn’t I? I was so angry…” I tried to reverse my memory and remember what exactly had happened after Adam passed out. I didn’t think I said anything to upset her…hell, I didn’t remember saying anything at all. “She wouldn’t take Kate…” I wasn’t sure why I said that out loud. Raegan would never do anything like that to me.
“No, she wouldn’t,” Jax confirmed.
“I can’t stand the other option either.”
“What’s that?” he asked, turning onto the dirt driveway.
“Her leaving Kate. Leaving me.”
Before he could push the gear into park, I went flying up the porch steps and shoved inside Audrey and Jace’s door. Just as I stomped into the foyer, a little blur flew past me. I looked down and watched Kate, in socked feet, using the wood floor as her personal skating rink. She ran past me again and then stopped before quickly scurrying back in front of me.
“I’m skating, dad!”
“I see that,” I chuckled.
The instant I saw her brilliant blue eyes, a large piece of my heart unclenched and I scooped her up. Her arms wrapped around my neck and we squeezed each other like we hadn’t just been eating dinner together only a few hours ago. This is how she greeted me every time I went away, either to work or just to the gym. How could I ever live without out this again? How had I not suffocated, living without it for so long? No matter what happened with Rae, she would be my constant and I swore I would be hers.
But I didn't plan on letting her mom and brother go anywhere either.
“Daddy,” she began quickly, “we get to have special daddy and Kate time. Mommy is having special time with Braden. I really miss bubba. But I got to play with the baby. I even helped Auntie Audrey give her a bath and she really liked it. She kicked her feet really hard! Do you know when they’re coming back?”
A small part of me had hoped that Rae and Braden were in the house somewhere—that they hadn’t actually gone anywhere. But her words confirmed what Braden’s missing terrarium had already told me. They weren’t here.
I looked up and noticed everyone was sitting in the family room, watching us. The whole crew was there, minus two of the most important ones.
“How about you take this bag to Aunt Em and have her help you get into your swimsuit. We’re going to have special daddy and Kate time.”
Her face lit up and she squirmed out of my arms, bouncing on her toes when they reached the floor. “We can swim when it’s dark?” she shrieked excitedly. “Can we eat ice cream, too?”
With a laugh, I asked, “Does that sound like fun to you?”
“So much fun!”
“Well then, of course we’ll swim at night and eat ice cream too! Go on, get your suit on and meet me out back.”
She skipped away, half sliding and half hopping across the wood floor, straight toward Em and Quinn. I pointed to Audrey and Jace and nodded my head toward the backyard. Jace flipped on the pool lights as we headed out, which cast a black glow across the darkened concrete. Their pool had a black bottom, which at nighttime made it appear like glass on the ground.
I tugged my shirt over my shoulders and decided my gym shorts would have to do for swimming tonight. When Audrey returned from lighting candles, I approached them both.
“Where is she?”
“At a hotel,” Jace responded.
My fingers moved raggedly through my hair and I looked to Audrey with clear stress in my eyes. “I freaked her out, right?”
“You?” she questioned. “I only got the scene second-hand, but I think she believes you’ll never be able to look at her the same.”
“Why the f*ck would she think that?”
“Dude, that guy just admitted that Raegan was the reason your daughter was kidnapped.” Leave it to Jace to cut to the chase.
“That disgusting a*shole was the reason. Not Rae,” I bit out.
Audrey dashed toward me, slamming into my chest and throwing her arms around my neck. I instinctively squeezed her tightly.
“You could’ve been hurt. You could’ve gone to jail, you idiot,” she babbled.
“I know, I know. It was bad.”
“I think you should really think hard before you go chasing after her,” she said, completely shocking me.
“What the hell do I have to think about?”
“The situation.” She gestured toward the house. “Your daughter was kidnapped, Lane. Raegan’s boyfriend was the one that made that happen. Think hard about your feelings toward that. When you look at Jocelyn when she’s a year old and she’s just starting to walk, you’ll think about what Kate looked like when she was that age. Will you look at Raegan and wonder, if she hadn’t been your nanny, would you have lost all those years?”
“So Raegan should be punished for her scumbag ex? Which, by the way, punishes all four of us?”
“No, I don’t think that all. But I do know how resentment can build over time. Even irrational, nonsensical resentment. I just want you to know your true feelings now, so they don’t surprise you later.”
“Take the night to process everything you were told tonight, man. Let Raegan process it as well. I know she feels terrible,” Jace added.
I began pacing the length of the black pool. How could they tell me she was feeling terrible and expect me to sleep on it tonight?
“You paid for her hotel?” I asked. He didn't answer so I helped him out. “I know she didn’t. I found her wallet on the floorboard of my car. She must have left it there earlier today, and she didn’t even have it with her at dinner.”
“Yeah, I paid for it,” he sighed.
“You’re sending me that bill.” Before he could protest, I said, “That’s my family. I take care of them. Now which hotel is she at?”
“Lane, you already promised Kate you would be with her tonight,” Audrey warned.
“And that’s exactly where I’ll be until she passes out from all the fun. After that, I’m going to get Raegan and Braden. Now please, what hotel is she at?”
“She’s at the NYLO Dallas, but I don’t know her room number,” Jace responded.
“That’s fine, I’ll just call her.”
“She left your phone here.” Audrey cringed.
“You guys really aren’t making this easy on me tonight,” I groaned.
A few beats later, my little ball of energy came flying out the patio doors with a bright pink swimsuit on. It was difficult, but I managed to put the majority of my thoughts aside so I could enjoy our daddy/daughter night. Worries about Raegan and Braden were still in the back of my mind though, relentlessly taunting me, reminding me that I needed to go get them.