CHAPTER FIFTEEN
Ash made a face as he read an email from a doctor friend inviting him to a dinner on Friday night to discuss the latest developments in their profession. Normally, he wouldn’t hesitate to say yes. But he already wasn’t spending enough time with Brenna.
Things had started to get hectic again with Brenna’s work. Their company usually got very busy from November until the end of the southern hemisphere summer in February. Some of the events she was managing were being held on weekends, which meant he and Brenna were hard pressed to find one whole day that they could spend together. Also, while he didn’t begrudge her visiting Patty, it didn’t help that Darren’s mother seemed to be requesting too much of her time.
In the last three weeks, they’d only seen each other seven times. That simply wasn’t enough. He missed her like crazy.
But he had a remedy in mind for that. He couldn’t wait to see her tonight so he could raise the topic.
*****
“Bren... baby...” Ash gasped in pleasure as he thrust faster into Brenna while rubbing her nub with his thumb. He was rewarded with her cry of ecstasy, her orgasm triggering his own powerful release.
He collapsed on top of her, catching his breath. “I love you,” he whispered in her ear, thinking he could say that to her a gazillion times and never get tired.
Brenna mumbled something resembling ‘Me too’.
He raised his head to look at her. Her eyes were shut and she was lying perfectly still. She was tired—exhausted perhaps.
Smiling fondly, he kissed her. “Goodnight, sweetheart,” he said, then lay on his back.
“Hm. No,” Brenna said sleepily. “I need to go home.”
He wrapped her in his arms tightly, not intending to let her go anywhere. “You’re too tired to drive. Stay here tonight.” They really should have gone to her place instead of his. But Brenna had been preferring his house over her apartment, saying it was more convenient as it was closer to their offices. Whenever they were scheduled to meet on a weekday, she’d drive to his place early in the morning, then they’d both go to work together in his car.
“I can’t stay,” Brenna said, half-heartedly trying to extricate herself from his arms.
“Yes, you can,” he said authoritatively.
“I don’t have work clothes here for tomorrow,” she reasoned.
He sighed. Brenna had been so preoccupied with problems she’d been having with a particular conference she was managing. She’d forgotten again to pack some clothes for an overnight stay at his place.
“Wear the same thing you wore today,” he joked.
“Are you kidding me?” she said, opening her eyes and frowning at him.
He smiled, seeing the perfect opportunity to bring up what had been on his mind for some days. “Why don’t you move plenty of clothes here so you’d always have something fresh to wear? In fact, why don’t you move in with me so you won’t have this same problem again?”
Brenna stared at him, her eyes wide and disbelieving. Suddenly, she seemed awake.
“Ash...” she said, her expression turning to uncertainty. She sat up, looking at him uncomfortably.
His heart pounded. Yes, he’d expected her to be a little surprised by his suggestion, but he’d also pictured in his mind that she’d be excited about it. He couldn’t see any good reason why they couldn’t move in together. But did she?
“Honey...” she said tentatively.
His heart dropped to his stomach at the tone of her voice.
“It’s a great idea and I do want to,” she continued. “But I’m so busy with work right now that the thought of moving houses kind of overwhelms me.”
Ash scolded himself. Of course. He should have thought of that, and should have been more considerate of the stresses she was currently going through.
“Hey,” he said, taking her hand. “I understand. There’s no hurry.”
Brenna sighed with relief and smiled at him. “Thank you.”
“If you want, though, we could always hire a company which could also pack and unpack everything for you,” he suggested, putting forth a solution for her problem.
Brenna frowned. “They’re expensive. Besides, I don’t think I want anyone else touching my stuff.”
“They’re professionals, Bren. I don’t think you’d need to worry about privacy or security. As to costs, so what? I’ll help you pay for them.”
“Oh, Ash,” she said, putting a hand on her forehead. “I’d really prefer it if we waited.”
He pushed aside the sheer disappointment that hit him, focusing instead on the distress he heard in her voice. “Sure, baby,” he said, rubbing her arm. “You let me know when you’re ready. Just don’t let me wait for too long,” he added teasingly.
To his consternation, Brenna looked even more worried. “I’ll try,” she whispered before leaning down and giving him a kiss. “I have to go.” Then she got out of bed.
*****
Ash settled himself in his office chair after seeing his last patient for the day. He had a couple of personal messages waiting for him. One of them was from Amanda, and the other—which went through reception—was from a name he didn’t recognise. He returned his sister’s call first.
“Hey, sis. How’s everything going?”
“Good. You?”
“Hectic, but good. You rang earlier?”
“Yeah,” Amanda said. “Did you get a phone call from a Jane?”
“Yes. I have a message to call her back. Who is she?”
“Um, she rang me too. She’s Darren’s cousin—one of the daughters of Patty’s sister Sally who looks after her.”
“Right. Why is she ringing us?” he asked curiously.
“Well, she was asking for my email address. She said she’s organising a small get-together that Brenna and Darren don’t know about. Apparently, Patty was the one who instigated it and she wanted the two to turn up on the day without them knowing anything about it beforehand.”
“A surprise party?” he asked with a frown.
“She said I’ll know more when I get her email in a few days. She didn’t want to divulge anything yet until she’s got the email addresses of all the people she wants to contact, and Bren’s family and close friends were included in her list. Apparently, Patty had Bren’s mum’s number from way back, so this Jane person rang Auntie. As you know, Bren’s parents are in Africa, and apparently Auntie got surprised about the news that Bren and Darren were back together. But then again, you know that Bren doesn’t get to talk regularly with her parents. Anyway, Auntie gave Jane our names and phone numbers so we could get the invite to this... surprise get-together.”
“Sounds like Jane really wants to keep this a secret from Bren and Darren,” he said, highly intrigued and more than a little bothered. “Did you get an indication of what this is all about?”
“No,” Amanda said, sounding frustrated. “I tried to get Jane to tell me, but she said I’ll know soon enough. She did beg me not to tell Bren or Darren about it. Apparently, Patty would get really disappointed if the two find out before it happens.”
Ash stared out the window, wondering what to make of this news.
“I’m debating whether to tell Bren, Ash. I’m thinking she’d want to be prepared. But at the same time, if it’s a big thank-you party for her and Darren from Patty, then that might wreck the whole thing for all of them. I’m assuming Bren has told you the latest about Patty’s condition?”
“Yes. It’s not good news if they don’t find a compatible donor for her soon.”
“Yeah. So I don’t know what to do. What do you think?”
“I’m not sure. Let me call Jane back and see what I can find out.”
*
Ash exhaled his disquiet as he put the phone down. He hadn’t gotten anything out of Jane either—just that he should wait for an email invitation to hit his inbox soon, and that hopefully he could attend. The only extra information he got was that it would be an intimate gathering of only a very select group of people.
Like she’d asked of Amanda, Jane had also begged him not to tell Brenna about the whole thing. She’d hammered the point that it would spoil it for Patty if Brenna wasn’t genuinely surprised on the day.
Ash tapped his fingers on his desk. A major part of him wanted Brenna to know about this. He hated the thought that a grand gesture from Patty might bring Brenna closer to Darren. But were his reasons purely out of selfishness? What if Brenna would truly appreciate a surprise thank you for all the sacrifices she’d made for that family?
He had no answers at this point.
*****
“I’ll see you tomorrow morning, babe,” Ash said as they prepared to walk back to their respective offices after having lunch together. “And I’ll call you tonight to remind you to pack work clothes for tomorrow. Also, I know you have an event happening this weekend, but how about you also stay with me on Saturday night? I’d love to spend two straight nights with you again, even if I don’t see you during the day.”
Brenna glanced at him with a look that he’d been seeing lately every time he raised the topic of her spending the night at his place: hesitation.
“Um, I might be able to concentrate on my work better if I go home, Ash,” she said weakly.
He stared at her, claws of fear slowly closing around his heart. Brenna used to love staying over at his place at the beginning of their relationship. There were even times when she’d turned up without notice because she’d missed him and his body. That hadn’t happened in the last three weeks. What was going on?
“Hey,” Brenna said softly, putting her palm on his cheek. His face must have shown his emotions.
“Is everything okay, Bren?” he croaked.
Brenna gulped. She was silent for a moment before she exhaled loudly. “I’ll tell you tomorrow, okay?” she said.
“Am I gonna like what you’re going to say?” he asked in a low voice, trying to keep panic at bay.
She bit her lip. “Probably not. But I’m hoping you’ll understand.”
The fear that was slowly creeping into his system was now zipping around fast and unrestrained. “Let’s talk about it now,” he said, not caring if he had an appointment coming up in a few minutes.
“I can’t, Ash,” Brenna said, checking her watch. “I’ll be late for an important meeting. I really have to go now. Promise we’ll talk tomorrow, okay?” She gave him a quick peck on the lips before waving goodbye and hurrying off.
Was that their last lips-to-lips kiss?
He shook his head to dislodge the thought. Don’t be pessimistic, Ash, he scolded himself.
He couldn’t afford to think like that while in public. Or he just might break down and cry. Which would be incredibly pathetic.
But then again, since when had he stopped being such a sad case when it came to Brenna?
*****
Ash stared in shock at the email in his inbox. What? Even if this was another pretend thing, why hadn’t Brenna said something to him?
His phone started ringing. It was Amanda who, no doubt, got the same email from Jane. He rejected the call, not ready to talk to anyone until he’d fully absorbed what was right before his eyes.
Brenna’s recent actions flooded his mind. Did her apparent reluctance at spending the night with him have something to do with this invitation? Was she too scared to tell him something that she knew would hurt him greatly? Or was he reading too much into this? After all, she was still sleeping with him, so she must still be attracted to him, at least. Maybe she was just truly overwhelmed with work.
But he’d never known Brenna to get fazed with being busy. His gut told him that work was only a small factor in whatever was making her act funny lately. Perhaps the situation with Patty was getting her down?
Regardless of the reason, he was bound to find the truth soon enough. He hoped with all his heart he was simply being paranoid.
He got out of his chair to go to the window and stare outside. Down below, across the street, was the section of the Royal Botanic Gardens where he and Brenna had their first proper kiss. His heart palpitated at the seemingly real possibility that there was only but a short moment in his lifetime that Brenna had been his.
He trudged back to his desk, unable to stop the negative thoughts that were like sharp claws scratching at his heart. He knew it was silly to be making such assumptions. But he couldn't help it. It must be the effect of years of unrequited love.
He sat back down, only to face the email again. The words on the screen jumped out at him.
You are invited to an intimate get-together to celebrate Darren and Brenna’s engagement!
There was a photo of the two, seemingly taken while they weren’t looking, with Darren’s arms around Brenna while he whispered something in her ear. They looked sweet together.
He forced himself to look closely. Was it a recent shot? It wasn’t a close-up, and he couldn’t tell. Brenna had her hair in a ponytail in the photo so he couldn’t tell if it was the same length and style as she wore now.
His phone vibrated on his desk. This time it was Connor. He shook his head. The guys must be getting worried about him.
“Hey, bro,” he said, not bothering to hide his dismal mood.
“Hey,” Connor said. “I take from the tone of your voice you’ve seen the email.”
He sighed gustily, leaning back on his chair and staring at the ceiling. “Does Amanda have any more info on this? Has she heard anything from Bren?”
“No,” Connor answered. “She’s as surprised about this as you are. Bren’s in a meeting, so Amanda hasn’t had the chance to talk to her yet. We’ve actually wondered if Patty misunderstood something and mistakenly assumed that her son had proposed to Bren. If that’s the case, those two have to know what Patty has been planning. This party is happening in a few days.”
Yes. The party was going to be held on the last Saturday of November. It occurred to Ash that he could be nursing a severely broken heart around the holiday period.
“I’ll try to reach Bren,” he said to Connor, more scared than he could remember being in his entire life.
“Let’s us know what she says, okay? And please call your sister. Like right now? She’s worried about how you’re taking this. She said you might be overreacting and thinking the worst.”
Ash smirked mirthlessly. Brenna had not wanted to spend as much time with him lately. If Amanda knew that, would she still think he was overreacting if he said he was anticipating a big, devastating blow to the chest?
“Will do,” he said before saying goodbye to Connor.
*****
“Hi,” Ash said, finally getting hold of Brenna.
“Hi. What’s up?”
“Can we meet tonight?” he asked.
“Oh, honey. You know I can’t. I’m not likely to finish work until about ten at the earliest. We’ve run into so many problems with this conference that we’re so behind. We don’t have a choice but to work overtime so everything goes smoothly when it starts tomorrow.”
He squeezed his eyes shut. Could he wait until tomorrow?
“Ash, what’s wrong?” Brenna asked, sounding nervous.
Something inside him was prodding to ask the ridiculous question of whether Brenna and Darren were truly engaged, and not just pretending. It was a ludicrous notion, but what would be the problem if he did ask it? If Brenna raged against the stupidity of his question, or laughed at it, at least that worst-case scenario would be out of the way and he could start breathing easier.
He sighed. “I want the truth, Bren,” he said quietly. “Give it to me straight, please.”
“What truth?” she whispered.
“Is the engagement thing with Darren true?”
He heard her gasp. “Who told you?” she asked.
“Doesn’t matter,” he said, every nerve ending in his body standing up in fear. “I just want to know if it’s at all true that you and Darren got engaged.”
“Oh, Ash. I’m so sorry. I didn’t want to keep it from you but—”
“So it is true?” he asked, more than shocked. “Bren, this has got to be a joke.”
“Ash, I’m really sorry. When I agreed to pretend that Darren and I are back together, I wasn’t expecting things to get out of hand. But they did. And I couldn’t do anything to turn back the clock. I should have told you earlier, but Darren and I agreed it would better to keep this to ourselves—at least for a while. I meant to tell you tomorrow.”
Ash’s heart shattered into million tiny pieces. At the edge of his consciousness, almost as if he was watching himself from above, he wondered if he’d ever be able to put his life back together again.