He held me against him, his heart beating in my ear. I traced his scars with my free hand, his grip pressing me against his chest.
“I will never leave you,” he whispered in my ear, before he kissed my mark. The jolt I had felt only twice before shot through my body. I stiffened at the sensation, looking up to Ilyan in a panic.
“You feel it too?” His voice was awed, which somehow made me worry more.
“Yes. I felt it before, when you... in the sight, I mean...” I let my voice trail off uncomfortably, unsure of how to phrase it.
“You felt it then?” Ilyan’s voice was quiet and unsure. I had never heard him without his confidence, it was somewhat endearing. “I have always wondered – since that day all those centuries ago – I always wondered if you felt it too. If you heard what I said.”
I nodded once, his face relaxing, his confidence almost instantly returning. It was interesting, every time I saw that hidden side of him, it was like I was seeing the real him.
“I did. I heard every word.” He smiled again and I looked away, unsure if I wanted to talk about this.
“I meant every word,” he whispered. “I will always love you, but I will never force you to be with me. I will never stop you from being with Ryland. He is your mate, Joclyn. I will always respect that.”
Ilyan gently placed his hand against my face, and lifted me to meet his eyes. He looked at me softly, his eyes full of the golden specks of light I had seen before.
“Thank you, Ilyan.”
“Of course,” Ilyan let his finger trail up my jaw to rest on the mark on my neck, the jolt shooting through my body again. Ilyan smiled, I am not sure he could help it.
“Ilyan, what does it mean?” He only shook his head, his face confused and yet so hopeful.
“It means,” Dramin began from behind us, his voice making me jump, “that the Siln? has come to accept what you mean to her, My Lord.”
Ilyan turned at Dramin’s arrival, his face breaking out into a wide smile. Dramin returned the smile as he set down a heavily laden breakfast tray before embracing him.
“Welcome back, my old friend,” Dramin said. “It is so nice to see you alive and well. You had us worried.”
“I highly doubt that,” Ilyan chuckled, “but thank you for taking care of me and Joclyn. I cannot thank you enough.”
He clapped Dramin heavily on the shoulder, but Dramin only looked at me curiously.
“So, Joclyn, is it? That is a very pretty name.” He smiled and I instantly felt awkward. I hadn’t realized I never told them my name.
Ilyan looked at me, his eyebrows raising in confusion.
“They never asked.” I reached out to grab a mug out of Dramin’s hands in an attempt to ignore the look he was giving me.
The cup had made it only half way to my lips before Ilyan hollered out and hit the cup hard. It sped away from me, spilling the delicious Black Water all over the floor.
“Stop! Joclyn! Do you know what that is?” I turned to Ilyan, my stomach tensing in realization. There was something he didn’t know after all.
“Oh,” I said, nerves wiggling into me. I turned to Dramin who nodded to me once in encouragement.
I said nothing as I grabbed the empty mug off of the floor and placed my hand over the rim. I felt it fill instantly. I took a deep breath before removing my hand; I knew there would be no easy way to tell him.
“Yes, Ilyan, I know exactly what it is.” I spoke as plainly as I could, trying to ignore the nerves that filled me and the terrified look on Ilyan’s face as I took a drink from the rich Black Water. I felt it move into me, tingling me to the very core. I sighed appreciatively and turned back to Ilyan, smiling shyly.
He looked at me, with his mouth open, his eyes looking at me with a heavy, new found appreciation. I felt my insides loosen. I was afraid he would react like Thom, or worse.
“You’re amazing,” he said, his hand moving softly up my arm.
“If you think that’s amazing,” Dramin chuckled, “wait until you see what else she can do.”
Twenty-Six
I stood in the middle of the training hall, the three men facing me. Dramin bounced on his toes in eager anticipation, Thom stared off into space looking bored, and Ilyan looked into me with a deep rooted mix of confusion and anticipation. I shrunk into myself again, feeling uncomfortable, before consciously shaking off of the feeling.
I firmed my feet against the ground, took another deep drink of the Black Water, and prepared myself.
“Now, Ilyan,” Dramin said, “remember, you cannot help her. As much as your body calls for you to do so, she will not be able to show you all that she has accomplished if you do.”
Ilyan nodded once before turning back to me, the intensity of his gaze increasing somewhat. I felt my pulse quicken.
“Great, Dramin!” I yelled back to him. “Now if I mess up who is going to come to my rescue?”
Dramin laughed and I felt my nerves jump.