I moved further into the kitchen before ducking down and sliding myself underneath the counter by the bar stools. My knees slipped on rotting food and a couple of small mice scurried away, but I barely took notice.
Had it come to this? Had the T?uha really become just vessels for energy? I was hiding underneath a counter, amongst garbage, terrified about what was going to happen in this place that joined me to my mate. Ryland’s voice echoed in my head, his promise to break the Z?lství, his gentle words begging me to do the same.
And yet here I sat, hiding from him, just so I could keep the connection without wasting away. It seemed ridiculous, even to me. What was I doing? I felt my eyes burn with the threat of tears. My emotions were too close to the surface after last night.
“I thought I told you not to come!” Ryland yelled.
I could not see his face, only his foot as he attempted to kick me. I was sure the contact would send me back so I dodged it, scrambling through rotten food and broken glass, sending barstools side-long into the kitchen.
“Get out of here!” he yelled as he chased after me.
“Please leave me alone, Ryland. I will leave in a minute,” I begged as I continued to crawl away, my hands and knees covered with filth and dirt.
“No one wants you here anymore!” Ryland yelled again. I looked back to him as I reached the end of the counter, my stomach dropping to see his angry little body swinging a bar stool right toward my face.
It made contact and I howled out in pain, the impact sending me right out of the T?uha. I sat up automatically, my hand flying to my nose. Pain had never followed me like this before, not like it did with the nightmares. Even with the nightmares I was never truly injured. In the T?uha, however, it seemed that I could be.
I lifted my hand to my nose, hoping to add some pressure to my magic and help the injury to heal faster. I froze when my fingers touched the warm wetness of my own blood, which seeped from the gash in my face. I stared at the blood on my fingers, my breath coming faster than usual.
“Joclyn?” Ilyan asked softly. My panic had obviously woken him up. He placed his hand on my back, rubbing up and down my spine in a comforting way. “Are you okay?”
“I’m bleeding.” I spoke like it barely even mattered, my shock still seeping in.
Ilyan was up in a flash, one arm wrapped around me while the other held my hand before moving to inspect my face. His fingers pushed softly against the skin, his face filled with deep worry lines.
“What happened?” Ilyan asked.
“Ryland threw a chair at me.”
Ilyan froze, his hand still pressed against my face. I felt his other hand tighten against my hip, his magic swelling in frustration.
“In the T?uha?” The heavy restraint he placed on his words made me tense.
“He has become very aggressive in getting me out of them.” I said and looked away from him.
“But... to hurt you?” Ilyan’s fingers pressed against the bridge of my nose, his magic healing me quicker then I could heal myself.
“I’m not sure it’s coming from him.” I looked up at Ilyan as I felt the skin knit back together, the red tips of his fingers moving away from the tender skin. He raised his eyebrow at me, prompting me to continue. I swallowed hard, worried as to how he would respond.
“Cail made it very obvious that he is in control of my dreams. I think he is manipulating the T?uha as well.” I picked at the hairs of the furs we were covered with, uninterested in looking at him.
“What!” Ilyan’s voice echoed around the cave and I cringed a bit and moved away from him, but he only moved me back against him. “Has he hurt you?” His magic surged strongly into me as if expecting hundreds of broken bones.
“No, he likes to mess with my head, but I don’t know what else to do. I have to go into the T?uha. And I can’t control if the dreams come or not.”
Ilyan’s body stiffened, his panic seeping into me. I could tell that my new injury, mixed with the fact that Cail was controlling my dreams, was terrifying to him. I had been worried before, but hearing his shallow breathing against my hair, the worry was building into fear.
“I only went in once while you were gone,” I said as I pulled away from him, desperate to calm him down.
“How long was I gone?” he asked, his voice soft.
“Three days.” Ilyan’s hand moved down my face to lift my chin up to look at him.
“And the nightmares?” I looked away from him, not wanting to be reminded of the horrors I had been faced with. “I will fix this. I will make the T?uha safe for you to go into. I will never let it happen again.”
I pulled his hand away from my face, holding onto his fingers tightly. I still couldn’t believe that he was alright, that he was awake.
“Thank you,” I said. “I can’t do this without you.”
Ilyan pulled me against him, his hand still wrapped around mine. “I know.”