chapter 14
Raven! It’s good to see you,” Dr. Richmond said, using his body to hold the door open.
“You too,” Raven returned, actually happy to be here. He wasn’t sure why he’d come, other than it felt right.
Richmond’s face dropped to a grimace as he inspected Raven’s features. “Have you been ill?”
“Uh, no. Just not getting much sleep.”
The doctor waved him in. The living room was filled with buzzing from a TV in the corner that no one watched. Some reality show with a girl dressed in clothes that had to be from the children’s department, who was crying — mascara smeared her cheek. Doc Richmond shook his head. “I don’t know why my wife likes these shows. I think they’re all staged. No reality in reality TV.”
“Well, reality is overrated.”
The older man found the remote control and hollered toward the back of the house. “I turned off your show, hon.”
A voice echoed from down the hall. “I’m doing laundry.”
As she said it, the strong scent of detergent drifted into Raven’s nose. Sometimes he wished things weren’t so intense. Smells, his sight, everything a brilliant kaleidoscope of colors, scents, tastes, and feelings. Right now, he’d be thankful for the whole world to gray down.
The phone rang. “Have a seat, Raven. I’ll grab that and make it quick, and we can chat.”
Raven sank onto the floral couch and also to a new low, seeking consolation and friendship from a balding scientist. If he wasn’t careful, they’d be joining a bowling league next and picking out matching polyester shirts. But when Raven heard the young female voice skating through the phone lines and out to him, his gaze shifted to Richmond, who stood at the edge of the hall. He cast a glance back to Raven and pointed to the phone. “My daughter.”
Raven nodded and motioned for him to come and have a seat in the living room. Not because he wanted to hear her voice. Nah, couldn’t be that. Yet she sounded so very alive and enthralling, and Raven tuned into her words as the doctor approached. Okay, so sometimes great hearing was a blessing.
Richmond dropped into his easy chair. “Yes, sweetheart, we’re still going. No, not this weekend, next. Are you taking your medicine? Good girl.”
That’s right, Richmond’s daughter was diabetic. He’d mentioned once he was worried she’d forget her daily insulin shots while she was off at college.
Raven heard laughter, and it sailed into his chest cavity, causing his heart rate to pick up. When he realized the reason why, he sank a little more. The girl sounded like Nikki. He closed his eyes and tried to ignore the sound.
Something drew his attention to the hallway. Almost commanded him to look. He obeyed, and there on the wall, mixed in with a ton of other photos, was a small snapshot of Jessica Richmond standing out like a firefly among moths. He moved toward it, coupling the voice with the face and body that wasn’t Nikki’s. He needed this, to separate the two girls in his mind, or the rest of his day would be plagued with that rolling laughter. That, he could do without.
Jessica was beautiful. More so than Nikki in every traditional sense. She stood on a beach in a bikini and dared the camera to look away. Her smile was bright and perfect, natural, and it too reminded Raven of the girl he’d just given up.
He growled and spun away from the picture just as Richmond ended the conversation with his irritatingly happy daughter.
Raven dropped back onto the couch.
“She’s a card, my girl.” Richmond sat the phone on the coffee table, by a large square book titled Castles of Europe. “All excited about her grade in Physics.”
Raven nodded.
“No matter how busy she is, she takes time to check on us. We’re going out of town for our anniversary and she thought it was this weekend.” He brushed his hand through the air. “But enough about that. What’s wrong, Raven? You don’t seem yourself and you look like you haven’t slept in a week.”
“I’ve got a lot going on.” Am I really about to confide in Richmond? Seemed so. “You ever think you know something only to find out you were way off?”
Richmond raised his hands. “I’m a scientist. That’s a daily occurrence for me.”
“Well, I’m not a scientist and I don’t like being wrong. Besides, it’s a little different when it involves people.”
“Did someone betray you?” Richmond leaned forward to rest his elbows on his thighs. He studied Raven intently.
“Yeah.” Raven laughed. “Me.”
Richmond waited, lips pursed.
“Sorry, Doc. It’s just that I thought this girl and I …” No, he couldn’t go through with it. Even total heartbreak wouldn’t make him a share-your-feelings kind of dude. He stood and headed toward the door.
Richmond grabbed his arm and tugged him toward the pictures on the wall. “Did I ever tell you about the time I tried hair replacement?”
Raven shook his head to clear it.
“It failed miserably. You should have seen me. It looked like I’d sprouted miniature bean stalks on my head.” The doctor dug behind the pictures that had been stuck in the frame edges of other pictures. Some were two and three deep. His sleeve caught the corner of the beach picture as he reached past it. Raven watched as Jessica Richmond tilted and dropped to the floor. From the tan carpet, she smiled up at him. He reached to pick her up. She and Nikki definitely shared a smile. Broad, soft lips, and white, even teeth. Raven brushed his thumb over the photo, half expecting it to be three dimensional, the colors and expression were so vibrant. He tucked it back in its spot inside a framed Christmas photo of Dr. Richmond dressed as Santa.
“Well, anyway.” Richmond turned to face Raven. “The hair replacement was an expensive and utterly disastrous choice. But I had to try it, or I’d have always wondered.”
And Raven understood. “Sometimes you have to give something a chance, even if it’s ultimately the wrong choice?”
Richmond nodded. “You put it behind you, and move on. And you take what you’ve learned.”
Raven stared at Jessica but saw Nikki. “It hurts, Doc.” He was only marginally surprised when Dr. Richmond’s arm came around his shoulder.
“I know, son.”
“How long will it hurt?”
“I wish I could say. All I know is that another journey awaits you.”
At that, Raven’s attention snapped, eyes shooting to Richmond.
The older man smiled. “Life is one journey after another. Don’t get trapped in yesterday’s when tomorrow’s is waiting for you.”
Okay, that weirded him out until he realized Richmond wasn’t talking about journeys — at least not the way Raven knew them.
Yet, there was something prophetic and profound in the words. It’s the same thing Raven told Nikki: he was heading in another direction. And somehow, Richmond was involved. He’d felt it from the beginning. He’d always wanted to protect Richmond — always felt there was a need. Not surprising, since Richmond spent years working for Omega Corporation before he learned the horrible truth about what his breakthroughs were really creating.
The scientist released Raven and headed back into the living room. Before Raven could stop himself, he reached out and grabbed the photo of Jessica, tucking it into his back pocket. For a few seconds kept his hand over the photo. The photo that wasn’t Nikki.
Nikki and Mace rose above snow-dusted mountains. She’d been in the air for a couple hours and her wings weren’t even tired.
“You’re getting the hang of it.” Mace tilted, his gray-white wings angling just enough for her to tuck in closer.
“It’s like I’ve had them forever.” Even though he hovered nearby, she knew how much she could pump her wings to keep from bumping into him.
“You have. Are you tired?”
“We could take a break. I’m getting hungry.”
“Follow me.” He stretched to tilt one wing downward. There wasn’t much below, just a lot of trees and the occasional curved road snaking around the mountain. A smattering of houses had smoky chimneys. Nikki wondered why there were never paintings done from this viewpoint. Maybe one day she’d do that — paint from the sky. Let the world see what it looks like from above, where all the dirtiness melts into a picturesque landscape.
They touched down in a small town somewhere in the mountain range. Nikki didn’t know where they were and really didn’t care. It felt so good, so free to just be without the immediate threat of a seeker or a madman or a hell hound at her back. She’d purposely forced everything from her mind except enjoying Mace, the day, and her new wings. Even if it was only for a day.
He took her by the shoulders and pointed to one mountain. “Do you recognize that?”
The rocky plateau did look familiar. Then she remembered. “That’s the mountain where we watched the eagles — I mean, the Halflings.”
He nodded, and before she knew what was happening he pulled her to him, hugging her so hard she wondered if her ribs might crack. When he released her, there was an unusual light in his eyes, an illumination born of excitement or maybe expectancy. “Come, on,” he said, and took her hand, leading her away from that particular view.
They entered a restaurant that looked like it was converted from an old train car. Nikki slid into the booth by the curved glass window and expected Mace to sit across from her. Instead, he slipped in beside her, nudging her over to make room. She accommodated him, relishing the feel of his warm body and the smell of wind and winter on his skin.
He nodded to the snow-capped peaks beyond the window. “Beautiful, isn’t it?”
She noticed a winding path led up one mountainside. “Gorgeous.”
“I bet you’d love to draw it, wouldn’t you?”
Her gaze fell to the table. “I can draw things now if I’m careful. Will helped me learn, but he also warned me to be careful. Vigilant, I think he called it. It could open a door to the other realm.”
“And let hounds through?”
She nodded. “So, no drawing for me. It’s not worth the risk.”
“I’m sorry, Nikki.” He looked away for a long time, but his sudden change in posture held her attention. Nervous, maybe a little uncertain. Rather than look at the beautiful landscape beyond the window, she examined Mace.
He reached for her hand. “What if there was a way you could draw without worrying about opening a doorway for hounds?”
His hand was sweaty in hers. Very unnatural, and she could feel his pulse increase as he spoke. “If there was a way, would you do it?”
“What do you mean?”
He angled on the seat to look at her fully. “Nikki, we could leave the battle. We’ve found each other.”
She shook her head. “What are you talking about?”
“You’re a Halfling. When Halflings find their match, they’re able to leave the war if they choose.”
Now her heart pounded, matching the beat of his. “And what?” Was there actually a way out of this nightmare?
“We’d have to seek an audience with the Throne. If you’re truly my match, he’ll give us the option to leave the fighting behind.”
“Where do we go?”
“We’d live on the earth as a married couple. From what I understand, our angelic side sort of goes dormant. We even age like humans. That’s where a lot of Xians come from. They are Halflings who once found their match.”
“You told me Xians were just humans who are aware of the spiritual battle.”
“Some are. But some are Halflings … or were Halflings.”
A new kind of joy filled her, the spark of hope, of having a normal life again. “We’d leave all this bloodshed behind?”
He squeezed her hand. “Yes, Nikki. Leave it all behind.”
They could be married and live a normal life. Have friends and go on vacations. Buy a house and maybe even raise a family. “Could we one day have children?”
Mace’s face fell. “We could have one, but …”
He didn’t have to finish. “But it would be taken from us because we aren’t human. And our offspring would be a Halfling expected to fight a war we ran from.”
“Nikki, it’s not like that. A Halfling baby is taken for his or her own protection.”
“And we — the couple who created the child — walked away from the fight to let our child take our place?”
He brushed a hand through his hair. “We don’t need to have kids.”
She scooted toward the window, creating some space between them. “That’s not the point. We would have run away from the war.”
“No.” His eyes pleaded with her. “You’re looking at it all wrong. It’s more like a reward. You know, for our service.”
She worked to keep her breathing steady. “What service? What have I done? Nothing.” Her voice rose as she spoke. “All that talk about how important I was to the Throne, and you’re ready to just walk away? To let me walk away?”
“Nikki, I’m just trying —”
She held up a hand to silence him. “To protect me, I know.” Would he really have her run? “Mace, I love being with you. Today has been great, but there’s a war going on out there. We’re warriors, not runners. We can’t hide behind a human shell and spend the next sixty or seventy years pretending there’s no battle. It would destroy both of us.”
She could see the words drilling into his plan, cracking and shattering it. She had to make him understand. “You know why Raven left? He said you were my match, Mace. Do you know why?”
When his eyes came up to meet hers, the pain they held nearly stopped Nikki’s voice. But he had to understand this, because right now — fresh from a victory and laden with wings — she was strong enough to face his hopes. But what about another day when she was weary and exhausted from the fight? On a bad day, he could easily convince her with a look much less wrenching. “Raven said you’d challenge me to be everything I can be. Instead, you’re asking me to run away from my destiny?”
He opened his mouth, but she cut him off. “That’s all I have left, Mace. I have the promise that my life — my actions — matter. That they’ll make a difference. I won’t walk away from that. Not even for you.”
She pushed against him until he let her out of the seat. Hands fisted, Nikki walked to the restaurant door. Once she was safely on the other side, she broke into a run until her wings lifted her back to freedom.
Mace touched down on the mountaintop and breathed a sigh of relief when he saw Nikki tucked into the rock ledge. It was the same place they’d once sat and watched the elaborate ritual he’d hoped to share with Nikki.
Who was he kidding? She’d been right about everything. They were warriors, and warriors don’t willingly leave the battle. They win it. Or they die trying.
The rustle of his feathers caused her to look over. Her hands went to her face and smeared tears in a feeble attempt to make them disappear.
“I’m sorry I’m such an idiot.”
She sniffed. “You’re not an idiot.”
“Yes, I am.” He closed the distance between them and motioned to the rock. “Can I sit with you?”
She slid over.
A cluster of trees moved with the mountain wind. Clumps of snow drifted from their branches and landed in heaps on the ground. This would have been the perfect time to soar with her.
She angled to face him. “Could you really have done it?”
He drew in a long breath. But I had to make a mistake. “I wanted to think I could leave this war. But I don’t know. If it’s what you would have wanted, yes.”
“Leave Vine and Will?” Her eyes were red. “Leave Raven to his own devices? And what about Vessler? Just walk away from the chance to stop him? Vessler was planning to make wingcuffs. Thousands of them to take – our friends — as prisoners.”
And use Nikki’s DNA to build Halflings he could control. A detail she still didn’t know. And he wasn’t about to tell her. But to think she could be the catalyst able to bring about his insane plan … that was more of a burden than even he needed. In truth, he’d reasoned that leaving the battle, and undergoing the change accompanied with that decision, could protect her. No angelic side, no DNA to turn dark.
Her gaze narrowed. “What is it?”
Mace looked away. “Nothing.”
Beside him, he felt her angle closer, which normally he enjoyed. “Mace, tell me what’s going on. You know something, don’t you?”
“Contrary to what you might think, I know a lot of things,” he tried to joke.
“Don’t keep secrets from me. People have kept secrets from me my whole life.”
He’d be no better than the rest if he didn’t tell her the truth. But can I deal with what that truth will do?
“Mace.”
He turned to her and took her face in his hands. “Nothing, Nikki. Really. I was just expecting to spend the evening catching branches you dropped for me. Instead, I’m having to think about going back to the battle.”
“I’m sorry, Mace.”
“Me too.” Sorry he couldn’t tell her the truth about her godfather. Vessler didn’t just want to turn Nikki into a dark creature. He wanted to cut her open and use what was inside to spawn an impossible number of dark creatures. Nikki wasn’t just a warrior. She was an army.