3) Let the Sun-In grow out of my hair. Why the HELL did I ignore the warning “reddish results may occur in dark brown hair”? Rachel says I should amputate the red part but I say short hair is worse than red hair.
4) Eat only fat-free foods! No more Portillo’s hot dogs!
5) Go out with Carlos Medina (a HOT exchange student from South America or Spain or somewhere like that).
More on Carlos in a minute. First I need to catch up on the whole last year. Here are some highlights (Rachel is helping because she is better at remembering my life than I am!):
1) I made varsity cheerleading. The only sophomore. Totally on track for head cheerleader, maybe even by next year.
2) I made the homecoming court (for the second time). On track for homecoming queen.
3) In July, I broke up with Jonathan to go out with Scott Slazinski, a wide receiver from Central who I met at a party. It was a little scandalous since they are our crosstown rivals, and I accidentally cheered for him at the end of a close game. Oops.
4) After football season ended, I broke up with Scott to date Jeff Doyle, a senior. His ex-girlfriend, Penny Winkelman (also a senior), and all her lame friends were so pissed. But I was like, “Get over it. I can’t help it that I’m cooler and more fun than you.” Only it turned out I am cooler and more fun than Jeff too. So I dumped him and now he’s going back out with loser-face. What can I say? Boring people belong with boring people.
5) Best movies I saw with Rachel, Annalise, and Ethan: Broadcast News (Ethan’s fave because he wants to be a journalist or writer), Fatal Attraction (remind me to never have an affair! Holy shit!), and Dirty Dancing (saw it four times). I’m obsessed with Patrick Swayze. Those arms! Whoever I marry better be able to lift me up over his head like that because NOBODY PUTS DARCY IN THE CORNER!
6) Oh, yeah. Rachel just reminded me that the stock market crashed in October. Blah, blah, blah. Because Black Monday really affected my life…Not!
Now more on Carlos: He is seriously finer than fine. He’s a cross between Rob Lowe and Jake in Sixteen Candles—who is my ideal guy. He has the same dreamy brown eyes, broad shoulders, and square jaw. And he has the sexiest accent. He’s in my P.E. class so I get to see him in shorts every day, playing his native game, soccer. SCORE! (Which he does about every five minutes.) God, he is SOOOOO beautiful. He seems really sweet too. The only issue I have with him is that he’s on the short side. But if he hits a growth spurt, I would totally marry him. And even if he doesn’t, I still might. Because, you know, looks aren’t everything.
Okay. Rachel and I are going to go shower and hit the mall. I need some new Victoria’s Secret push-up bras. My A-cups are my only physical flaw. But like Carlos, I’m sure they’ll grow!
February 12
Carlos is either shy or playing hard to get and it’s really getting frustrating. He barely gives me the time of day even though I put on lots of makeup right before P.E. and wear my push-up bras. Also, I’m very tan from four sessions at Tahitian Tan (my mom bought me a ten-pack). Rachel mentioned how dark my legs were in the gym. Carlos was standing pretty close to us so I said as loud as I could, “I know. I practically look Hispanic, don’t I?” And then looked right at him. Nothing. Maybe he didn’t hear me. Maybe he was offended. Oh. My. God. Maybe he’s gay??? That would suck. Then again, I bet I could convert him.
February 17
I’m not the most patient person in the world. So guess what I did today? I marched right up to Carlos, who was getting his books out of his locker, and said, “I’m tired of waiting.” He smiled and goes, “Pardon?” in that to-die-for accent. (I made a mental note to start saying “pardon?” instead of “what?”) So anyway, I go, “I’m tired of waiting for you to ask me out.” He laughed the sexiest laugh (I don’t know how a laugh can sound foreign, but his did) and said, “Okay. Will you go out with me?” I smiled back at him and said, “I’ll have to think about it. Call me later and I’ll give you my answer.” Then I wrote my phone number on his palm and turned right around and walked to my locker with my best runway sashay, lots of hip movement, easy to do in my new, three-inch Nine West sandals. Rachel said he watched me the whole way. But I didn’t need her to tell me that. Because I always know when a guy is watching me. Call it a sixth sense. I think I have him in my clutches now. God, I hope I lose my virginity to him. How cool would that be? To have sex with a passionate foreigner with an accent?! It’s sooo much more romantic than doing it with some goober from Indiana who you’ve known since kindergarten.
February 18