I laugh and feel my cheeks burn. I think I know what she's getting at. I nod and look her square in the eye.
“What can I say? He is so fuckin good. It is mind blowing, I’m forty five and having the best sex of my life” we both scream with laughter, like schoolgirls.
“Oh my god, is he really that good, you know he has a legendary reputation? He's been with a couple of my friends and they said he was good but they were just so in love with him, I wasn't sure if that was influencing their opinions but shit, it’s all true, my little bro in law is good in the sack” she laughs, my insides actually clench and squirm just talking about this.
“He is just so out there, he loves sex and he wants me to love sex too and he does everything in his power to make that happen. He's inventive and considerate and so encouraging, he gives me everything and doesn't hold anything back, that's what I love most”
I'm getting quite emotional as I talk about what he does for me. There's so much.
“You know what I think?” She asks, I shake my head no.
“From what you have just told me and from what Zac has told me Gabe has told him, I think the pair of you are in love with each other but because it’s all happened so fast, you just don't realise it yet, or are both just too scared to admit it, that's what I think. For what it’s worth”
I say nothing, am I in love, could I have fallen in love with someone this quickly, is it such a bad thing if I have?
We both giggle some more at Gabe’s sexpertise. I thank Sam for our chat, I am feeling both devastated, for Gabe and what he has been through but, as ashamed as I am to admit it, I’m also just a little bit relieved that it didn’t all pan out the way I feared. We head back inside.
We are in serious need of a drink after such a heavy confessional but as we lock the doors behind us so the kids can't get out onto the balcony, I notice Ava's tearstained face. Oh God, please don't let her have heard any of that conversation, I look at Sam as I put my hand over my mouth
“Oh fuck, please tell me she didn't hear any of that”
Ava's waving me to come over to her.
“Hey chicky whatever's wrong?” She throws herself into my arms and cries into my ear “I got my period”
“Oh noooo, don't stress babe, we’ll sort it out, have you got anything with you?” She shakes her head at me as she wipes her tears. I look at Sam as I hold Ava's hand.
“Where’s the nearest bathroom?” she points to the hallway at the back of the room. I tell Sam, quietly, what's happened and ask her to go down and fetch my bag. We meet her in the bathroom.
Between us, Sam and I get her cleaned up and I give her the pads I brought with me to use and she goes off and puts them in the room her and Sophie will be sharing tonight. We give her a bit of a talk on the joys of having periods but I don't go overboard, I'm not her mum and don't want to be stepping on anyone's toes. As she goes off with Sophie, she’s full of herself, now that she has stopped panicking, and can't wait to tell the rest of her friends.
Shit, what an afternoon and the footie hasn't even started yet. Get me a drink, now, please!
I go down stairs and before my foot is off the last step, I feel him, I don’t know if it’s his stare or just his presence but when I when I walk into a room and he’s in it, I can feel him. I look up and his eyes are on me. I meet them, not taking my eyes from his as Sam fills my glass, I walk over to where he's standing with his brothers, I put my arms around his neck and give him the best kiss I can muster, I lean back and look at him.
“Congratulations baby, your daughter just got her first period” The boys all let out a big cheer and laugh, Gabe looks completely shell shocked!
“Oh poor Ava, she’s just a baby” Jen comments
“She’s almost fourteen Jen, hardly a baby; she’ll be out clubbing with me soon” Stella jokes
Gabe slides his hands around my back; I think it’s more to steady himself, than to hug me. The colour has drained from his face.
“Ava? Is she okay, does she need anything, is she okay?”
“Well, yes, yes, no and yes. She was terrified, Sam and I sorted her out, I gave her pads and we told her all the things she can expect and I think now, she's just feeling pretty stoked and relieved that she's finally started, she told me in the week that she was worried because all her mates had started and she hadn't, stop worrying, she's fine”
“She told you she was worried? When? Why didn't she tell me?”
“Pfftt, Gabe please you’re her dad. She's thirteen, she's probably too embarrassed”
“Right yeah, I s’pose, she’s got her periods, shit, I can’t believe it, thanks for sorting things out, good job you were here”
He pulls me towards him and kisses the top of my head; I can feel he's heart pounding as I lean against his chest. He moves his arms tightly around me, crushing me almost and buries his face in my hair.
“God Lauren, I fuckin love you”