Save Me

“So, do you want to talk about it?” Ava asked.

They did know then. Tegan more than likely banned them from saying anything. Her relationship with them was rocky and that kind of made me resent them a little. It was fucking obvious that she was going off the rails but they did nothing really to pull her back in. And I also knew that blaming them was wrong because if someone didn’t want help there wasn’t a lot you could do about it.

“Not now,” she replied and hugged my arm. “I just want to eat and chill with Kai.”

Ava raised her eyebrow but I couldn’t give a flying fuck what she thought about that innocent action because Tegan’s breast was pressed against my arm.





Chapter Fifty


Tegan




The last week had been horrible. I missed Lucas like crazy and just wanted him to come back and tell me he’d made a huge mistake. I’d called him twice but it just ended up in an argument so I didn’t try again.

I was able to kid myself for a while that it’d work out but I woke up twelve hours ago with a firm understanding that we were done and he wasn’t interested. It sucked but I knew it was what I needed to move on. Or try to move on.

Another thing that’d changed dramatically was my relationship with Mum and Ava. I wasn’t as close to them as they were to each other and I didn’t ever expect that but things were improving. Once a week we were going to have a girls’ night, get takeaway, wine – coke for me – put on questionable coloured face packs and paint our nails. I wasn’t that girly but actually, it was nice.

I felt stronger now, physically, mentally and emotionally. Seeing Melanie twice a week was really helping and she made me see things in a different way. I still had bad days but they were less frequent.

I sat on the sofa eating ice cream and watching Scream on a Sunday night. I was a total loser but I couldn’t be bothered to do anything. “You sure you’re going to be okay on your own?” Mum asked, leaning against the wall.

“Yeah, fine, Mum, you guys have a good night.” Mum and Ava were going to a candle party. Yeah, a candle party.

“Okay. Kai’s going to stop over in a minute,” she said. Kai stopping over meant that she called and asked him to come and babysit me. Perfect.

“Come on, Mum, we’ll be late,” Ava said.

“Yeah, don’t want to miss a second of the fun.”

“Don’t be so sarcastic, Tegan,” Mum said, nudging my arm, smiling. She stood up and grabbed her handbag.

They’d not gotten out of the door when I heard Kai’s voice. She didn’t even want me to be alone for two seconds.

“Hey, princess,” Kai said, walking into the room. When he saw me his face fell a little. What? I smoothed down my hair. Did I look a total mess? “Hell no, Tegan. Get up.”

“What?”

“This is way too depressing and cliché.” He gestured to the ice cream. “You need to go out.”

I groaned. “I don’t want to go out.”

He raised his eyebrows and sat down next to me.

“Please, can we just stay here?” I asked, pouting and giving him my puppy dog eyes. Rolling his eyes, he kicked his feet up on the footstall and laid back.

“Fine, but you need to stop eating the ice cream.”

My mouth popped open. “Are you calling me fat?”

“No, of course not. You’re not fat. I didn’t mean that, it’s just…” Sighing harshly and glaring, he added, “You did that on purpose.”

I laughed, nodding. “So, what do you want to do?”

“Hmm, let me think… What can we do while we’re alone…”

Oh, of course. “I walked right into that one, didn’t I?”

“You did. Want to watch something? Nothing depressing, it’s got to have fast cars, a bit of nudity and blood.”

“Going all out on the stereotype, huh? Sounds good to me, though.” I handed him the remote and lifted the blanket up so he could get under it.

“Are you going to let me feel you up under there?”

I arched my eyebrow. “No.”

“Then I’m not boiling under a blanket.”

“You’re lovely,” I said, dropping my arm.

Laughing, he flicked through the channels and found an action movie.

“So, how’re you doing? And don’t just tell me you’re fine.”

I shrugged and scooted closer, laying my head on his shoulder. “I’m doing okay now. It’s over and there’s nothing I can do but move on.”

“You’re sure it’s over?”

“Really sure. The last time we spoke was awful. I accused him of never really caring and he told me to grow up. I don’t understand how he can care if he walked away, you know? You can’t tell someone you love them and expect them to believe you when you leave.”

“I don’t know, sometimes loving someone means making hard decisions. If someone you loved would benefit from you not being near them you’d go, right?”

I glared. “You’re supposed to be on my side, Kai.”