“He just knows what you and I are like when we have a drink together. Look what happened the last time I went to Main Street with you and without him. We’ve been together just over ten weeks Stell. I was attacked by my husband on the night I met him. Then again a few weeks later, actually in Gabe’s home. And then the accident up at the lake. He’s just worried something else will happen. I have been a bit of a disaster zone lately. Poor bloke, he really must wonder what he’s got himself into.”
“Naaa Lauren, he loves you big time. Fuck, he’s marrying ya isn’t he? Jeeze, I for one never thought that would happen, never thought I would see Gabe fall in love even and definitely not want to get married again. He’s changed so much since he met you. Like, instantly, overnight, he met you on the weekend and came back on the Monday and was just different and he didn’t keep it secret. He was open and told the boys that he had met someone and that it was just different, I felt so sorry for him; the boys were just taking the piss and saying it was just because you had a great rack. They obviously noticed your tits in the pub. I s’pose because… well, you do have a great rack Lauren, but anyway, I wasn’t there so I hadn’t seen it all unfold but the boys were just laughing and telling me how he couldn’t take his eyes off you. He didn’t deny any of it, he just laughed at himself and shrugged and then said to me. ‘Fuck it, I’ve met someone I like. What’s the big fucking deal? They need to grow up.’”
I smile as I hear this new revelation. It makes my heart want to burst, I’m missing him now. I could handle being apart if I knew that I was going home to him tonight but I’m not, nor tomorrow night either. God, it’s just two nights, get a grip woman.
“Stell. Can I ask you something?”
“Of course you can.”
“Do you think if I arranged for Gabe to see a counsellor he would go?”
“A counsellor? Why does Gabe need to see a counsellor? What’s wrong?”
“Please do not repeat a word of this to anyone ever Stell, seriously.”
“I swear, I won’t, you’re scaring me Lauren, tell me what’s wrong.”
I take a deep breath. “Gabe thinks he doesn’t deserve to be loved. He thinks that I’m going to eventually leave him and Ava will one day cut him out of her life. He doesn’t feel he’s worthy of love… Because of what went on between him and Jackie.”
“Far out. Seriously, why, why would he think that? It wasn’t his fault. It’s not like it was an affair. She abused him, he was under age.”
“I know, I’ve told him all of this but he just feels so guilty. I think Charlie dying has made him feel worse and he’s really struggling with it all and I don’t know what to do, I want to help him but I don’t know where to start, I need you and your brothers and Sam and Jen in on this one, he doesn’t think any of us should love him. He broke down and told me all this, this morning, that’s why he’s being so paranoid. He thinks that if I’m left alone with time to think, that I will get rid of the babies and go back to Jay.”
SHIT!!! I know what I’ve just let slip before Stella takes it in. I watch her face as she digests my words. Her mouth drops open. “Wh…wait a minute. What babies? Are you pregnant?”
Her mouth drops open again as she looks from my water to my belly to my face. “You are? You’re fucking pregnant aren’t you? Are you serious and you didn’t tell me? When? How far? Oh my god, get him on the phone. I’m gonna kill him, why the fuck didn’t he tell me? Get him on the phone right now.”
There are only one other couple in the restaurant and they are staring right at us. “Stell. Calm down, don’t ring him yet, it’s supposed to be a secret, no one is supposed to know, I have to have some tests done because of my age, once we get the results back from them and we know everything is okay. Then we will tell people, we have to consider Ava, she will be devastated if there is anything wrong with them.”
“Them? Anything wrong with them. YOU’RE HAVING TWINS?”
Seriously, Stella has no volume control, but I can’t help but smile at her enthusiasm. “Yep. We’re having twins, around June the twenty first they are due…All being well”
Stella jumps up from her chair and slides onto the bench seat and throws her arms around me. “I can’t believe it Loz. I am so happy for you both. Oh my God, he must be over the moon, another set of twins, you two are like your own little fairy tale. Oh my God I’m tearing up.”
We spend the rest of our meal and the rest of our evening in fact, discussing, babies, Gabe and Jackie. Stella ends up sleeping in my bed with me, but tells me the next morning she had to go to the spare room in the middle of the night because my snoring was so bad. Well I slept fine!
I get up when I hear Stella moving about in the kitchen. I have to be up at the Palmers place at nine to meet the carpet fitters so I need to get my arse into gear. I call Gabe to wish him good morning and to let him know that as it’s such a beautiful morning I am off to take a walk on the beach for half an hour but he doesn’t answer, I don’t leave a message, those horrible voice to text things never seem to understand my accent and end up leaving a message that makes no sense, I will just call him once I’m back.