I didn’t want the looks of sympathy, the looks of pity and sadness. I wanted the fucking memories to go away.
“Hey, man, where are you?”
I pulled my eyes away from the painting and met Luke’s brown ones. “Sorry,” I said as I cleared my throat and sat up straighter on the couch. “I think I need to head off to bed. The night’s events have worn me out.” The adrenaline was leaving my body, and I felt exhausted.
“All right,” he agreed as he slapped a hand on his leg and stood up. “Just remember, I meant what I said. If you need anything, I’m here for you. Just—” he started as he gestured to my hip, “stop fucking cutting yourself. If you get the urge, call me. I’m here for you. You may feel like you can’t talk to me, but you can.”
I nodded and clasped my hands together. I hated seeing that fucking look on his face, but I appreciated it all the same. Being cared for wasn’t something I was used to.
“I’ll try, okay?”
“That’s all I’m asking.” He grabbed his bag and headed for the door. “I’ll call you soon!” he shouted over his shoulder as he opened the door and headed out.
Sitting back on the couch, I ran a hand down my face and closed my eyes. I needed to go to bed. I’d start thinking about everything else in the morning.
Two
One week later
Mason
Reaching under the covers, I ran a hand down the length of my cock and grabbed my balls, groaning at their tightness. I’d been lying in bed for the past half hour thinking about Emma.
The dream I’d woken from was so vivid in my mind. Her on her knees with my dick in her mouth, it was something I’d dreamed about many times, but this time was different. Her beautiful eyes stared up at me as she bobbed up and down, her spit shining off my skin like a beacon. The way she looked at me with want in her eyes as she enjoyed every inch I thrust into her mouth made me pump faster.
A blindfold was always in place with my conquests, never wanting my scars to be on display. Their hands were also held behind their back, so they didn’t grab on to me and feel the risen flesh from my scars.
It was the reason I did everything I did. I had secrets and I wanted them to stay hidden, but with Emma? With her, it was different. She’d seen my scars and all I could think of was her face. Every fantasy was with her in mind. She’d seen through my mask and for the first time, I saw light.
It terrified me. My whole life had been darkness. I didn’t know how to handle this new obsession I was beginning to obtain.
Wrapping my hand around my cock, I slowly stroked from base to tip and back again. Rolling the head of my cock in my hand, I kept picturing it down her throat.
I never thought I’d get to this point again. A point where all I’d think about was a woman. She consumed my thoughts just like Sophia did, but in a different way.
I wanted her to be consumed by thoughts of me, like I was of her. I wanted her to crave every inch of my body, like I did with her. I wanted her to need me, like I felt I needed her.
Squeezing my balls until I felt pain, I pumped faster and harder until my body tensed. I released all over my stomach and hands, groaning at every stroke against my sensitive head.
Letting out a heavy sigh, I closed my eyes and pictured Emma’s face. Staying away from her was what I should do. I’d told myself that many times. She didn’t need to be involved in anything that was going on in my life. After all, Donicko was up to something, and I still had no idea what that was.
I hadn’t gotten any closer to figuring out what I could do to bring him down, either. I was doing this alone, and there was a chance things could get bad. The only thing I was sure of was Victor, Luke’s dad and John’s partner.
John did way too much business in the office, and I knew he mixed business with pleasure. Victor was the primary shareholder of the company. He was the main money holder while John was only partial. Some would say Victor made John what he was today.
John was lethal, but if he was using the business to hide what he was doing, then I knew Victor would take him down, leaving me to watch the whole thing from the sidelines.
It wasn’t ideal for me because I wanted to be the one to do it, but I had nothing and no way to get anything to prove my theories. In the end, that’s what they were—just theories, plus Donicko’s pull at every corner.
Money was a big incentive, and I knew Victor had a lot of it.
Only time would tell how it would all work out. I just needed to get a meeting with Victor and begrudgingly tell him my story.
Three
Emmalynn
“What are you doing after your classes?” Mel asked me as she poured a cup of coffee.