As I join them, Jenn fiddles with her ponytail and Darby adds way too much sugar to her coffee. I wait for them to tell me why they look like someone died.
Jenn sighs loudly. “No doubt at some point in our marriage, Lucky has dipped his stick in another woman’s tank.”
“Charming,” Darby mutters.
“I told him when we got married that I never wanted to catch him. If I did, I’d take a carrot shredder to his cock. That doesn’t mean he doesn’t do it, just that he’s careful so I don’t find out”
“She has a point coming,” Darby tells me.
“Ford dipping his stick in someone else’s tank doesn’t mean you should bail on him.”
The mature thing would be to remain cool. Fuck maturity! Tears bite at my eyes and I struggle not to fly into a dramatic freak out.
“It’s been three days.”
“Ford’s never been a one woman kind of man. He’s under stress and the idiot doesn’t know any other way to relax.”
“It’s been three fucking days. If he dipped his stick somewhere else, he can fuck off.”
“We don’t know for sure. Not really,” Darby says.
Jenn sighs. “I saw him giving a chick a ride home and she’s the type to thank a guy by sucking him off. Full on daddy issues, that one. That doesn’t mean Ford whipped it out for her.”
Crossing my arms, I tell myself I’m angry. I say the words out loud too.
“Don’t be angry until you know.”
“It’s not like we’re in love,” I mutter, trying to give Ford an out for his cheating.
“You just started dating. He might not even know to keep his dick in his pants.”
“He told me not to make any decisions about leaving Blairsville,” I mutter, angry again. “That kinda implies he gives a shit if I’m still around when he’s done with club business. Oh, and he sent me his VD clean bill of health thing which means nothing if he plans to fuck other chicks. We haven’t used condoms. Fuck, I hope my pussy doesn’t rot.”
The women glance at each other then Darby decides to take the rational route with my growing mood swings.
“Men think different than we do. No way should you assume anything. Jenn could be wrong about what she saw.”
“Don’t put this on me.”
“I told you not to tell her.”
“I’d want to know. What if Joker was fucking around behind your back? Wouldn’t you want to know or would you rather have everyone talking shit behind your back?”
Darby waves her off. “That’s different. We were married. The whole vows and so forth. Shay and Ford have been together for less than two weeks.”
“Whatever.”
“What should I do?” I mumble, sad now.
“Ask him. Don’t play games. This isn’t high school and Ford isn’t a boy. Ask him then react to what he says. If he admits to messing around, dump him or keep him. Do something, but don’t do it until you hear from him.”
“Plenty of other men in Little Memphis,” Jenn says. “I can set you up with ten by the end of the day.”
Standing up, I sigh dramatically. My self-pity feels good, but I know it can’t last.
“Thank you for telling me and giving me advice. I need to throw a huge fit and cry in the shower. Once I’m done, I’ll do that mature patient thing you guys suggested.”
Leaving them, I first punch the shit out of a pillow on my bed. Next, I cry like a baby in the shower. Ford feels so far away now. Despite wanting to kick his ass, I miss him. I mostly want him to hold me and promise the fantasy isn’t over.
42
Ford
Heart Troubles
Waking up early, I’m ready to see Shay. Three days apart feels like a damn eternity and I need her in my arms to be sane again.
Knocking on the door, I frown at how Darby frowns at me. She says nothing, just calls for Shay. I hear a kid talking inside and figure she belongs to Bebe. I’m glad they weren’t around when we grabbed Paro.
Shay walks outside then keeps walking until we’re standing next to my Harley. She’s obviously tense, pissed maybe. Her gray eyes are impossible to read and I suspect she’s ready to run back to Hawthorne. Only three days apart and she wants to ditch me and her friends.
“No hello kiss?”
“Did you miss me?” she asks, hands on her hips.
I step back. “What is this? You’re pissed, so get to the point. I’m too old to play games.”
“I heard you gave a chick a ride home the other night. I was just wondering if you stuck around and had her help you get over missing me.”
“This fucking place and the gossip.”
“Did you fuck her?” Shay asks, losing her fire.
“What if I did?”
“I guess, I’d feel like a fucking idiot for not realizing you would.”
“What do you want from me? I do the club’s dirty work. I’m not Lucky or Joker. I can’t play family man when my hands are covered in fucking blood.”
“I know what you do. It doesn’t stop me from feeling what I do.”