I open it up and pull out the contents.
"Pictures from your wedding night."
The rest of the conversation is a blur. I hand him a card, which he accepts enthusiastically, assuring me he will indeed recommend us to everyone he knows, and by the way, he also has friends at other hotels, and he'll make sure they too use Hitched for all their party needs. I thank him, assure him Sebastian and I are still happily married, and I leave.
I'm walking too fast. I know I am. But I can't breathe, and I can't stop, and I just have to get home before I am completely destroyed by what I'm holding.
Somehow I manage the drive home through a blur of tears, and I ignore Tate as I run up to my room, lock my door, blast music and collapse onto my bed.
Because apparently I'm sixteen again, but whatever.
Only then do I allow myself to finish looking at the glossy 5x7 photographs I didn't even know existed.
I expected to look like a drunken mess, since that's how I always pictured the night in my mind. But the reality of the pictures is much different.
I look… happy. So incredibly happy and free and full of life and joy and hope.
In every picture, Sebastian and I are together—smiling, laughing, kissing, loving.
And as I flip through them, the memories finally emerge, strong and unabbreviated. Every moment of that night crashes into me. I remember our talks, how even in one night this man “got me” in a way no one else ever had. I remember the long walk where we bared our souls. Where I cried over my own loneliness and fears, where he confessed his deepest regrets, where we shared every tidbit of our lives.
And I remember why I married him.
Because he made me feel whole. Not because I'm incomplete without him, but because with him, I can see myself reflected in his eyes, and I see how complete I really am. How complete I've always been.
Chapter 34
Another Heart to Heart
The first call I make isn't to Sebastian. It's to his mom.
"Hi, Sylvia. It's Kacie."
Her voice sounds cheerful. Not suspicious and full of rage, as I'd feared. "Kacie, it's good to hear from you. How are you?"
I swallow the lump in my throat. "Um, I've been better. I was wondering if you had time to talk. I need some advice, and I didn't know who else to call."
"Of course, dear. Would you like to come to the house? We can have lunch and relax by the pool?"
"Yes, that sounds great. Would… today work?"
I can hear the smile in her voice. "Sure, why don't you just head out now? By the time you get here, I'll have everything ready."
The drive feels far too long, but I finally arrive and am once again blown away by the majesty of their home. Sylvia greets me at the door and invites me in. "We've got the house to ourselves for a few hours. So no need to worry about interruptions."
"Thank you for agreeing to meet with me. I'm sure you're very busy."
I help her bring our plates and glasses out to the backyard, and we sit by the pool. She's made a beautiful chicken salad with hummus and veggies on the side and fresh orange juice. Everything tastes delicious, and we eat in silence for a few minutes before I speak. "Did Sebastian tell you everything about how we met?"
She smiles kindly. "I know you got married in Las Vegas the night you met."
Well, this will go easier then. "Yeah. I couldn't remember all of that night for a long time. You must think I'm awful."
"Not at all. I think you two are young, and it was impulsive, but hardly the worst thing in the world."
"And we agreed to date over the summer, while our annulment went through. But the day I got the papers and went to show him, he was with his ex."
She nods but doesn't say anything.
"I know I overreacted. I didn't actually see them doing anything. I don't think he cheated on me—though I haven't actually asked him, but seeing them together made me question everything about our relationship. Whether we were really meant to be together. Whether Celene was a better fit for him, because of their careers and lifestyles. And I got scared. Really scared."
I take a sip of the orange juice before continuing. "I broke his heart. I know I did. And I broke mine too."
"And now?" she asks.
"Now, I don't know. I'm still scared. I'm still not sure. How do you know when you've met the right person? How do you know it will work out forever?"
"You never really know it will work out. That's a choice you both have to make each day. As to how you know if you've met the right person, I think that's something for which you have to look inward for an answer. But I don't think you'd be here now if you didn't already know the answer."
I take out the envelope of pictures in my purse and hand them to her. "I got these recently, from the night of our shotgun wedding. When I saw them, I remembered everything."