Damaged and the Outlaw (Damaged #4)

“You are a hero though.”


Frustrated, I wish she understood. “Over the years, I’ve regretted saving her. I can’t even see her without feeling regret. Would a hero feel like that?”

“I don’t know. Maybe,” she said, caressing my face. “I’ve never been a hero. You’ve never been a hero either until that day. You can’t know how a hero feels. Maybe they regret their choices. Don’t you think a fireman who saves someone from a burning building, but gets burned wouldn’t feel some regret? When people suffer, they regret the good things they’ve done. In the end, they still did those good things.” Raven cupped my face and stared into my eyes. “You did a good thing.”

“If I did things different, I could have said goodbye to my mom.”

“Different like letting Playboy live so he could kill more moms and kids? No, you did the right thing and your mom was proud of you.”

“You can’t know that.”

“I do. She took care of you all of those years alone. She loved you so much. I know she did because you aren’t some mean fuck. You’ve got a heart and you make people laugh. You have a lot of good in you and that’s because of your mom. She loved you more than her life and she would have wanted you to save Harlow. She wanted you to be a hero because all great moms want their kids to be amazing. Your mom was great and that’s why you’re who you are.”

Staring into her eyes, I felt the loss I’d been hiding from all of these years.

“She was a great mom. The best.”

Cradled in Raven’s embrace, I wept for my mom. I also mourned the boy inside me who missed the woman that made him the center of her world.





Chapter Seventeen – Raven


Big Bob’s Skating Center seemed louder than usual. Having spent the last few days alone with Vaughn in my apartment then at his place, being in public left me feeling exposed. As much as I missed the quiet, I knew Vaughn and I needed time away from each other. Mostly because the lie about friends with benefits was falling apart.

Even Bailey noticed.

“So are you and Vaughn together now?” she asked, holding onto the side of the rink. “Will I get to be the maid of honor in your wedding?”

“Vaughn just needed a lot fucking because of his mom dying. We’re only friends. Besides, I’m never getting married.”

“If you do, you’ll pick Lark over me, won’t you?”

“Probably. She would never forgive me, if I didn’t. Trust me that you don’t want her holding a grudge. Tiny chicks are sneaky.”

Bailey pulled at her ponytail then grabbed the side again. “I’m going to fall on my stellar ass.”

Grinning, I took her hand and pulled her away from the side. “I’ll keep you safe.”

Bailey’s eyes widened, but she didn’t scream like I expected. Her hands gripped mine as I skated backwards while pulling her along.

“I only know how to skate on the gravel,” she said and I fought the urge to laugh. “I really hate falling down.”

“You’re fine. I’ve got you, see?”

Bailey chilled and let me guide us around the rink. “You really like Vaughn, don’t you?”

“Yes, but he and I aren’t going to be anything more than we are now. Last night, we were in bed and he said he would dump me if he wasn’t so lazy. I told him he couldn’t dump me because I had already dumped him. We just keep it light because otherwise we’re both fucked.”

“He hasn’t cheated on you. I asked around and a bunch of his regular hookup chicks say he hasn’t banged them since he first banged you.”

“Doesn’t change who we are and what we can manage.”

Bailey nodded as I skated faster and her hands tightened around mine. “The Devils are going to kill him soon. I wish we could kill the fuckers, but Cooper doesn’t want to start something that’ll spill over to the whole club.”

“Maybe someone else could kill them?”

“Maybe. They wouldn’t all need to die either. Just the top assheads. The ones calling the shots. When another club that was heavy into criminal shit lost their president, the whole thing went to hell. Like in-fighting and other clubs trying to steal their territory and clients. If someone could kill the Devils’ president, vice president, maybe a few others who could take over easy, they wouldn’t care about Vaughn. It wouldn’t be worth the trouble, you know?”

“Yeah,” I said, thinking about how a handful of deaths could mean Vaughn would be safe. Harlow too, but my heart beat for the blond bastard who was watching me skate around with Bailey.

Vaughn stood with Judd, Cooper, and Tucker. Arms crossed, the men wore frowns. Whatever they were discussing pissed them off and I was glad for the separation. I didn’t want more bad news.

“Wait for me!” Sawyer screamed, arriving with Farah.