Damaged and the Beast (Damaged #1)

“I like the pillow idea,” I whispered in a squeaky voice. Swallowing hard, I tried to find moisture, but my fear sucked me dry.

Cooper left the bed, walked to the bathroom, and returned with a coffee cup full of water. I drank it then gave him the best smile I could manage.

“I’m sorry.”

Taking the cup, Cooper just shook his head. “Everyone has bad dreams.”

Nodding, I watched him set the cup on the table behind him then he rested on his side with the pillow separating us. After a few minutes of looking around as if someone might be waiting to jump out, I rested on my side and stared at Cooper.

“Do you want to leave the light on?” he asked.

“For a little while please.”

His gaze unreadable in the murky light, Cooper nodded. We stared at each other for a while and I worried he was angry. What if in the morning, he drove me home then pretended I didn’t exist? I knew he could do that and I would have no choice other than accept how he was done with me.

“Do you still love me?” I asked.

Cooper inhaled harshly. When he spoke, his voice broke. “So much it hurts.”

“I love you too. I’m sorry.”

“Stop apologizing.”

“I heard something like gunshots,” I said, glancing back at the window.

“It’s fireworks. A lot of people party when parents are in town. Shows you what kind of students we have that their parents are wild.”

Smiling slightly, I pulled the covers over me. When I had trouble yanking up his heavy comforter, Cooper reached out to help. Without thinking, I flinched and nearly fell off the bed again. His expression wasn’t unreadable anymore. He looked like a hurt boy who lost his best friend.

“I…”

“Don’t say you’re sorry.”

“I want to hold your hand.”

Once Cooper laid his hand palm down on the pillow in between us, I rested mine on top of it.

“The dream felt so real,” I said, trying to explain.

“Was it about me?”

Shaking my head, I frowned. “Why would I dream anything bad about you?”

The corner of Cooper’s mouth twitched like he wanted to smile, but his mood was too miserable. “You’re still shaking,” he said after a minute.

“I’m glad you’re here. I would have been so scared in my apartment.”

Cooper finally smiled just a hint, but I knew he was bothered by my inability to find comfort from his touch. He rested on his side and watched me until I fell asleep.

When I woke up, Cooper was staring hard at the ceiling. He looked so angry that I was afraid for him to notice my eyes were open. Eventually, I slid out of bed and walked to the bathroom. After cleaning up, I returned to bed where Cooper still glared at the ceiling.

Unsure why he was upset, I felt a panic deep in my gut over losing him. I didn’t have any words to fix his anger so I used something I figured he would enjoy more.

Kissing his chest as I slid in next to him, I licked the outline of the cross on his chest. Cooper’s breathing shifted, but I didn’t dare look at him and ruin the possibility of improving his mood.

I tried to channel the sexy part of me that knew what to do to make him feel good. Cooper’s hands were behind his head as I climbed over him to tease his chest. Then, I moved lower to his hard stomach and softly kissed the flesh the way he always did to me. In no hurry, I imitated Cooper and his leisurely way of making me squirm.

Cooper’s breathing sped up as I slid down past his belly button. Finally, I lifted my gaze to his face where he watched me with an odd expression. It was somewhere between horny as hell and examining an alien life form.

The horny as hell part made it an easy transition from his stomach to his hard cock. As it thickened even more in my mouth, I might not feel confident, but I could fake it. I’d gone to school sick before. I’d smiled on bad days. I could fake a lot of things and I could fake like I was a pro at blowjobs.

No matter my plans, Cooper stopped me. I tried to keep going, but he sat up and pulled me off him. “Just stop,” he said, wiping my wet cheeks. “It’s awful. You know that, right?”

“I can get better.”

Cooper shook his head and leaned back on the bed. He was still so hard and I wasn’t giving up. Either I needed to be more confident or fake it better. Straddling him, I tried to guide him inside, but couldn’t. Suddenly, I was too small or he was too big or I was just aiming wrong. Again, Cooper stopped me.

“Knock it off,” he growled, his dark eyes irritated. “You’re going to hurt yourself.”

“I want this,” I whimpered, full of frustration and panic. “Please.”

Cooper lifted me off his hips and I started to cry until he leaned over and kissed me. Soon, he was angled between my legs as his fingers stroked my nipples and his lips sucked hard on my tongue. Pulling his mouth away, he nuzzled his face in my hair.

“Tell me you love me,” he murmured in my ear. “Make me believe you want me.”