Beck had come to tell me that Greg is here before heading out with an excited Chelcie. Regardless of the reasons for them leaving the house, I’m happy that she will be able to breathe some fresh air. Maybe when I finish this heart-to-heart, I can talk Greg into letting me leave, too. I might as well take advantage of these overgrown apes offering their protection.
Walking down the stairs and through Beck’s large house makes me feel like I’m walking the length of ten football fields. Knowing that Greg’s waiting, and that the conversation with him isn’t going to be a nice, happy one, makes the walk even more daunting. I hear him puttering around the kitchen when I reach the hallway leading into the living room. I take a deep breath and come out of my hidden sanctuary. His head snaps around when he hears my footsteps against the hardwood floor. I can feel the distance between us in the energy floating through the rooms.
“Hey.” I smile weakly as I walk around the thick leather chair that Beck and I love to cuddle in, and run my fingertips along the back, hoping to ground myself to something that Beck’s touched. It might sound stupid, but just that little touch makes me feel like he’s right here with me.
Greg doesn’t speak. He just stands behind the little half-walled, breakfast bar that separates the kitchen and the living room. His blue eyes, which normally hold nothing but kindness and love, are clouded with worry. God, I hate this. I wish he could have just remained oblivious to all of this shit.
“You want to go sit outside? It’s a nice afternoon.” I try to smile again, but he still just stands there looking at me. “Can you please say something?”
He breaks eye contact and looks off to the side, just staring into space. I know he’s thinking, because he runs his hands through his hair a few times, drops his head, and holds the back of his neck, just shaking his head lightly.
“Please.”
His head pops up and the pain behind his eyes squeezes my heart. Between Izzy and Greg, I think I always knew he would handle things the worst. Even though we didn’t even know each other when the majority of this shit went down, it doesn’t matter to him. I’m his family, and if anything happens to his family, he feels it like it’s his own pain.
He takes a few more minutes before walking towards me. His eyes never leave mine until I’m forced to look away when his chest crashes into my face. His arms wrap around me in a vice like grip. He just stands here, holding me as if he’s afraid that if he lets go, I’ll fly away. I give him this, sliding my arms around his thick torso and holding him just as tight. His heart races against my ear, and his breathing is coming in rapid pants. My heart breaks a little, knowing that there is no way to explain this without hurting him more.
“I’m sorry,” I mumble against his chest.
“Are you kidding? What the hell do you have to be sorry for?” He pulls back, and my arms fall from his body and hang lamely by my sides. His warm grip against my biceps keeps me standing when I see the emotion in his face.
“I didn’t mean to hurt you. We’ve always been able to tell each other everything, but this . . . This was just something that I didn’t know what to do with. It’s taken me a lot to get to this point, Greg. You had so much going on this last year that, even if I had been ready to talk, there was no way that I could have thrown this on you. Not with everything that was going on with Melissa and Cohen.”
Things got a little crazy for a few months when Greg almost lost his son because of a crazy grandparent. Not to mention, the drama he went through with that whore he used to sleep with. Now that Melissa is almost six months pregnant with their twins, and they are all finally happy, things are definitely in a better place for me to let him in. He has someone to help him ease his mind from this.
“God, Dee. You know I would do anything to help you. You’ve been my family for years. When family needs you, for whatever reason, you’re there. Don’t you realize how much the people in your life love you?” He looks so confused. Damn, this is not going to be good.
“Come on, let’s go sit down.”
He lets my arms go and follows behind me. I walk back around Beck’s chair, once again trailing my hands across the soft leather. I close my eyes and picture his handsome face, smiling and full of love. I let my body fill with his love and open my eyes with a new determination.
I sit down on the couch and pat the cushion next to me. Greg smiles and shakes his head with my action. I’ve seen him do that a million times with Cohen, so he knows it’s my poor attempt at throwing some lightness into this darkness that’s swirling around us.
“I’m just going to start at the beginning and as hard as this is going to sound . . . just please, let me finish before you say anything.”