“He held the world, darlin’, no doubt in my mind about how he felt.”
“He would love you.”
“Yeah?”
He settles and I roll slightly so that I’m about to look into his eyes, our bodies now facing each other.
“It’s hard, because I will always miss him and I would never wish Molly away, but had my life taken a different turn and I met you . . . he would have been our biggest cheerleader.” Reaching up, my hand cups his jaw. “He always wanted me to live a life better than what we were born into. He saw it for himself, but I couldn’t, not for the life of me, see beauty coming from that. He would joke that one day I would walk right into a new life and I would be too busy living in my head that I would miss it until my ass hit the ground. Lee, you pack a mean punch and I think my ass still feels the sting of the ground.”
“You see it now, huh?” He looks deep into my eyes and blinds me with that smile.
“Yeah, baby, I see it. I see everything that I couldn’t see before. Everything.”
“I won’t let you go, Megan. I waited and I knew the second that I saw you that this was it for me. Do you know how hard it was to keep my distance and wait for you to be ready?”
“I’m still scared,” I tell him honestly.
His body moves closer and I move into his body until my arms wrap around us and I feel him completely.
“You get that what I had with Jack was something that, when I lost him, almost destroyed me?” He nods and I continue in hushed tones. “That almost destroyed me and the way I feel toward you, even this early, I know it’s so much more powerful.”
“It’s not early, Megan. I’ve been here, picking away at your walls for almost two years.” He laughs but it holds no humor. “If it hadn’t been Dani and Cohen’s wedding, it would have happened not long after. You were weakening around me every time I was near and it was only a matter of time. We’ve spent enough time together that you know what you feel. It’s never too soon when you’re sure. We didn’t just meet on the streets. We’ve been building this for a long while, darlin’.”
“That doesn’t mean I’m not scared, Lee.”
“I know, but we’ll get there. Together. You just have to take my hand and let me take care of your heart.”
I nod, not trusting my voice right now.
“Almost done. Can you handle more?”
“I’m okay, Lee. I really am. Last night was hard, but I feel free of that pain. It just stings a little.”
“First, before we finish this up. You need to know that you never have to keep Jack from me. You shared a life with him and he’s a part of you and a part of Molly. I want you to be able to come to me and know that I will never, not once, turn you away. He gave you a good life, baby, and he should never be kept in the dark.”
My eyes fill with tears and I nod, my hands flexing against the skin on his chest. I move them around his back and hug myself to his body.
“Thank you for that,” I tell him.
“You don’t have to thank me, darlin’,” his voice rumbles against my ear. “I don’t want to bring this back up. It kills me, but I have to know so that I don’t fuck something up unintentionally. Is Jack on Molly’s birth certificate?”
“Uh, yeah.” I tell him, confusion with the path this conversation has turned.
“I assume that means that you two decided before she was born there would be a certain amount of care when it comes to Molly’s knowledge of how she was conceived?”
“She will never know. Never, Lee. I don’t ever want that to darken her life. Ever.”
He must have read the panic in my tone because his body moves until he’s sitting, back to the headboard, my legs spread wide framing his thighs, until he’s settled his arms back around me. His hands squeeze my hips before moving up to curl around my neck.
“She can’t know,” I gasp.
“And she won’t, Megan. You trusted me with that last night and I will never betray that. I needed to know so that I could proceed with a full deck. She was and will always be Jack’s, okay?”
I study his face. Those eyes giving me nothing but understanding and I nod.
“You’re mine now, darlin’, and with that comes Molly. It’s a package deal that I want more than you’ll ever know. This is up to you on how we play this, but she knows me. That little girl stole my heart the first time she put hot pink lipstick on me, so it isn’t going to be a hardship for me here, but I need to know how you want to introduce us to her.”
This is it. This step will be me giving myself over to him completely and with a newfound strength, I give it to him.
“She’s young, but not stupid. I’ll talk to her when I pick her up. Give her some time to hear it from me before. I saw her with you, Lee, I know this will not be news that isn’t exciting for her. But I don’t want to throw us in her face. We start with dinner. Then we take it as it comes. Together.”
“I like that, darlin’.”
His lips hit mine in a deep kiss that holds the promise of more before he pulls back.