"Thirteen," I muttered under my breath as I held her to my chest and patted her back.
"Holy Mary Mother of God," she sobbed harder, clearly hearing me.
Shit.
Balls.
"I am a virgin," I continued to say over and over while my mother cried into my school jumper. "I'm saving myself for marriage, Ma."
"It's the rugby," she sobbed, fisting my jumper. "I blame the bleeding rugby for this."
"For what?"
"For you losing your innocence!" Mam hissed. She looked up at me and then burst into another bout of tears. "Those boys you play with, they're too old for you and obviously led you astray."
No, Ma, my dick led me astray when puberty kicked in...
"And she's in your bedroom," Mam wailed, dropping her head against my chest again. "Oh, dear god."
"Because you brought her here, Ma, not me," I replied as I continued to rub her back. "Let's say, for argument's sake, that I was with Shannon? Which I'm not," I quickly clarified. "But if I was and you were worried about me getting up to no good, then why in the hell would you bring her over here?"
"Because I was still under the impression that you were a virgin when I brought her over here, wasn't I?" Mam huffed, slapping my chest. "I thought you were having your first crush. I thought I was catching you in time."
Fair point.
"Ma, I'm almost eighteen," I tried to comfort her by saying. "You were married to Da by the time you were eighteen."
"That's different," she sobbed.
"How?"
"Because you're my baby," Mam sniffled. "Oh, god, my baby is sexually active."
"No, I'm not," I coaxed, hugging her. "I promise, I am not having sex." Right now. "I'm not, Ma."
"Are you at least being safe?" she choked out, looking up at me with big, tear-filled, brown eyes.
"I'm playing bleeding PlayStation with the girl," I strangled out. "Shouldn’t that tell you how safe I'm being?"
"That's true." Mam nodded and sniffled.
I sighed. "Thank you."
"So, I don’t have to worry, do I?" she added. "Being safe?" She sniffled. "Using –oh, dear god, condoms –"
"No, Ma, you don’t have to worry because I am not having sex," I stuck to the story by saying, and pulled her back to my chest. "So just relax."
How the hell did I get myself into this situation?
What was my life coming to?
In the space of one day, I had upset no less than three females.
The one that created me by telling her that I was no longer an innocent.
The one that used me by telling her via text message to fuck off.
And the one that blew my fucking mind.
Jesus Christ, my dick had a lot to answer to.
To be fair, I didn’t think I actually upset Shannon today, but it was still early, and I was running on some serious shitty luck, so my chances of making it out of this glorified playdate without fucking up was slim.
"Ma," I said after a solid ten minutes of her sniffling on my chest. "I'm going to have to go back up to Shannon now."
"Okay, love," she sniffled. "You won't do anything–"
"No, Ma," I coaxed, freeing myself from her hold and standing up. "I won't lay a finger on her because we are just friends, and I am a virgin."
"I know you're not," she croaked out. "But I'm trusting you to do the right thing."
"You can trust me, because nothing is happening between us," I repeated for the millionth time. "But I need to take a shower because I'm fucking soaked, so I'm going to use your bathroom, okay?" I moved for the door only to turn back and say, "Call me when it's time to pick up your demented dogs."
"About that," Mam sniffled.
"You lied, didn’t you?" I gave her an accusing glare. "You don’t have to pick Bonnie and Cupcake up at all tonight, do you?"
Of course, she lied.
One look at her sheepish expression and it was plain to see.
"You meddler," I accused.
"You sexer," Mam shot back in a tone as equally accusing.
For fuck's sake.
I wasn’t going to win here.
Holding my hands up in defeat, I hurried out of the kitchen before she drowned me in a fresh batch of tears.
46
The consequences of kissing boys in bedrooms
Shannon
Just like the last time I showered in Johnny's glorious bathroom, I took a crazy amount of time.
I couldn’t help myself.
I blamed the jets.
And his body wash.
And the smell of him.
God, I was losing my mind.
When I finally climbed out of the tub, I wrapped myself up in one of the huge, fluffy, white towels hanging on his rack and sighed when the luxurious fabric grazed my skin.
Johnny would never understand how lucky he was to grow up in a home like this, with parents like his, and towels this soft.
For a long time, I just stood there in the middle of his bathroom, listening to absolutely nothing.
No screaming voices.
No stomping footsteps.
No rattling door handles.
No feelings of impending doom.
Just peace.
When the cold finally got the better of me, I dried myself off and slipped my bra back on.
Wearing a bra was a waste of time considering I didn’t have much to conceal and what I did have were perky and stayed up on their own.
They certainly didn’t match up to the breasts those models on his bedroom wall displayed proudly…
However, ten seconds into wearing my bra, I was quickly yanking it back off with a shudder.
It was soaked right through, along with my underwear.
I spent an inordinate amount of time folding my underwear into the tiniest ball I could before wrapping my bra around them.
Embarrassed that I didn’t have my schoolbag to tuck them inside of, I stood like a fool in the middle of his bathroom, panicking.
Logic told me I was being silly, but the thought of Johnny seeing my underwear made me feel a little faintish.
Giving up, I decided to tuck them in my balled-up school tights before wrapping myself in a towel and heading back to his room.
This time, when I stepped out of the bathroom, I was prepared for Sookie and found her snoozing on the bed.
I was not, however, prepared for the sight of Johnny's naked ass.
He was standing in front of his chest of drawers with his back to me, a towel on the floor at his feet, and was in the process of pulling a pair of boxers up his thighs.
God, he even had muscles on his ass.
How was that even possible?
And then Johnny glanced over his shoulder and caught me red-handed.
"Like what you see?" he teased, arching his brow.
"Oh, god," I squeaked and then tore my gaze away from his round, tight ass. "I'm so sorry." Spinning around, I bit down on my lip and forced back a moan. "I didn’t expect anyone to be in here."
"It's fine, Shannon," he laughed. "Don’t worry about it."
Let me die.
Dear God, open the ground and let me fall through it.
"I, uh…" Shaking my head, I tightened my grip on my towel. "It's…uh–"
"I had a shower in my parents' ensuite," Johnny explained. "I was just coming to grab some clothes."
"Oh." I blew out a ragged breath and shifted from foot to foot. "Okay, yeah, that makes sense."
"It's okay, Shannon," Johnny said in a gentle tone. "Everything's fine."
"I know that," I blurted out, panicked.
He chuckled softly. "Then why are you still facing the wall?"
Dammit.
Inhaling a steadying breath, I swung around and faced him.
My gaze automatically swept over him and my heartrate spiked.
For once, Johnny's face wasn’t the reason for my rapid pulse.
Nope, that was down to the rest of him.
The almost naked rest of him.
He was wearing a pair of tight, white boxer shorts and that was it.
No shirt.
No pants.
No jumper.
No socks.
Just a pair of Calvin Klein's that hung low on his V indented hips – identical to the pair that I had worn of his last week.
The pair I had been sleeping in for nights.
God, I was pathetic.
Everything I had imagined from the moment I laid eyes on him was right in front of me.
And with this unobstructed view came the realization that both my imagination and my visual memory sucked.
I already knew he had a nice body.
I remembered his chest from that day.
Or at least I thought I had.