The Apocalypse

Chapter 38

Sarah

Illinois River



Did Neil think he was subtle in his affections? Sarah wondered as she watched the man scurrying about collecting long grass to place under the sleeping bags as extra padding and for warmth.

Or was he blissfully unaware that he wore his emotions so openly? To Sarah's face he was nothing but polite and reserved. He looked to be striving for coolly cordial, however he couldn't seem to help himself and when he let his guard down, he gave her the largest portions of their limited food, the choicest places to sleep, the first option at everything, while he took the last.

He always put himself last because, along with his obvious affection for Sarah, it was clear that he had a father's adoration for Sadie. As well he had a father's temper when she went too far in her joking, which was frequent. The girl could never seem to let anything pass without a comment or a look or a simple seemingly innocent quip. In her way Sadie was just as obvious.


And just as optimistic.

The two were strangely happy and content. Though to be sure they had their moments, still on the whole they acted as though the zombie apocalypse had been a benefit in their lives. And perhaps it had been. From what Sarah could piece together, Neil had been somewhat of a hermit—a lonely man who knew little besides work and keeping his garden vegetables from being pilfered by the neighborhood squirrels. While Sadie had been virtually ignored by her single mom and had never known her father save for yearly birthday and Christmas cards he'd send.

For them this was a new beginning and a grand adventure. For Sarah it was one miserable day after the next with little to look forward to and only pain to look back on.

Still the pair tried their level best to make her happy and she allowed them to. And in her heart she knew it was wrong of her. They gave and gave and she did nothing in return. Yes, she helped with meals, and she stood watch, and she hiked loads of water from the chicken coop down the boat and all the other chores of this new life, but she could never return their emotions.

She had already failed at being a mother and wife; it wasn't something that she could force herself to do again. So she strived instead to be simply a companion and, unbeknownst to her, in this she failed.

Their third night on the river was as cold as the others had been and snow seemed to be threatening. “I wish we could build a fire,” Sadie said through chattering teeth. “I'm fricken freezing here.”

“When Neil finally puts the tent up we'll get the candles lit,” Sarah said. “You'll see what a difference they'll make; I guarantee you'll be taking clothes off before too long.” The night before the three of them had camped out in the boiler room of an elementary school and despite being out of the wind and the light snow, they had shivered and snuggled to stay warm. Neil had forgotten entirely that he had found candles and when he had pulled them out of the bottom of his pack that morning with a laugh, saying: Hey look at these. I forgot all about them, Sarah could've smacked him.

“Taking off clothes, sounds sexy,” Sadie said with her smirk. “Maybe I'll get my own tent. Or better yet, my own barn.” They were in another barn for the night—this one had stairs that Neil pried away. Height or solid brick walls seemed to be the only real guarantee of safety against zombies. However, against the soldiers, who prowled constantly in search of supplies or women, only being sly and lucky proved of any use.

The day before the rain had stopped for a few hours around noon and allowed the dirt roads in that part of Southern Illinois barely enough time to solidify so that Sadie in the prow of the boat was able to see a dust ribbon in the air just over the crest of a hill. Frantically Neil had killed the engine and they drifted into a run of tall riverweeds as four humvees had come into view down river.

Luck had kept them from blundering right into the patrol. Sarah didn't want to think what would have happened if they had been caught. For certain Neil would've been killed. The little she knew of him made it clear he probably would have chosen that moment to make a stand for her honor, not knowing she had very little honor left. Every time she thought about the colonel and what she had been willing to do to save her parents and herself a shiver racked her.

Being turned away from the Island without food and weapons had, in a way, been lucky for Neil and Sadie. They at least had been able to preserve their honor.

Their barn for the night was just south of the little burg, Naples Illinois, where earlier, they had been able to scrounge another ten gallons of gas and some more canned vegetables, which Sadie ignored; this wasn't out of place for her. The girl had turned up her nose at the broccoli and after two apples refused any more, and as she and Sarah watched Neil putting up the little tent, she nibbled on Jolly Ranchers and pop tarts contentedly. Finally Sarah had to say something.

“All that sugar is going to rot your teeth. And besides there's nothing nutritious about any of it. And it'll stunt your growth.” Sarah had just thrown that last in, certain it wasn't in any way true.

“I can't eat broccoli even when it's cooked,” Sadie had replied. “And apples aren't all that healthy. Do they have riboflavin? Or six other essential nutrients? Because pop tarts do. It says so right on the box. And these are blueberry. That's a fruit.” As emphasis she pointed to the blue filling that was likely ninety-nine percent sugar.

Sarah shot Neil a look that said: Are you just going to stand there? Or are you going to say something? He cleared his throat and announced: “Sarah's right.”

“About what?” Sadie asked, taking another dainty bite at the edge of her pastry. “Am I really going to have my growth stunted? Is that what happened to you two?” Neil stiffened at this; he never liked his height mentioned.

“We're both taller than you,” Sarah replied, and seeing his discomfort added, “I'm five foot, four and Neil is probably five foot, six.”

This was such a clear lie—he stood a bare quarter inch taller than Sarah—that it had him mumbling, “I'm…I'm not that tall, really. But the point is, I guess, um, that you would do well to eat better. Even at your age, people still grow.”

“I'll take my chances with the pop tarts,” Sadie replied. “My parents were shorties, and you can't cure genetics, right?”

Sarah heaved out a big sigh, set her jaw as she would have when talking to her own daughter, but before she could say anything, Neil said, “Maybe you're right.”

“Neil!” Sarah said, putting her hands on her hips.

“I'm just saying that maybe a break from broccoli would be good for all of us and since we share and share alike, I would like a pop tart tonight to go along with my apple. And I think you should vary your diet as well, Sarah.” Her brows came down—she had made it clear to Neil that she thought pop tarts were gross—but then he tipped her a little wink.

“I guess I can have a couple,” she said, not understanding Neil's play. But trusting that he knew what he was doing.

“But there'll be none left,” Sadie said, leaping forward to grab the bag with the food in it and holding it back from Neil. “That's not fair. You two like broccoli and apples and corn. I don't. I would eat good stuff if you could find it—other stuff I mean. A cheeseburger. Something hot. I'm dying for hot food.”

“We may like some things you don't but it doesn't mean we like them every single day,” Neil replied, holding out his hand. “Come on, hand it over or maybe next time I'll just happen to 'over look' some pop tarts.”

This was a real threat since it fell to Neil to do most of the exploring. Cramped places gave the fleet-footed Sadie the heebie-jeebies and Sarah wasn't strong enough for hand-to-hand combat with most of the zombies that would come storming out of their bizarre hiding places.

“If that were to happen then you'd either starve or learn to like other foods,” Neil said.

“Then maybe I'll starve,” Sadie replied glaring.

“I could give you my pop tarts for breakfast,” Sarah suggested. “If you'll eat an apple now. Or some corn? What do you think? The pop tarts won't last anyways as fast as you eat them. This way you can have what you like and we can sleep knowing that your bones won't turn brittle with malnutrition.”

Neil was quick to agree, “And I'll save mine for the next day and before you complain, yes this is extortion. And it's what my parents did to me.”


Sadie sulked. “I doubt it, Neil. You were probably the dream child. Did your homework, ate your veggies. My parents didn't even know I existed.” She suddenly turned to Sarah and asked, “Can you cook? I mean like good food, like pizza? If we found the right ingredients could you make that from scratch?”

Sarah put on a brave smile and said, “I had never thought of myself as much of a cook, but I can try. We can do it together.”

“And I'm a wiz at homemade bread,” Neil put in. “I could make the crust for you. I'll do it as soon as we find some flour. Yeast will be easy. No one seems to have given it much thought. In fact we should be able to get some tomorrow.”

The thought of what tomorrow held dampened their mood. They hoped to get through St Louis by running down the Illinois River until it joined with the Mississippi. This ran smack dab through one of the largest cities in the country and they all figured that the stiffs would number in the tens of thousands, if not more.

And unfortunately tomorrow came very quickly. The candles and the extra blankets made the neat little tent a cozy nest and the night passed in a blur for each, save for Sadie. At the best of times she was a wild sleeper. She frequently talked or thrashed around, or seemed to think it nothing to throw a leg over either Sarah or Neil.

By unspoken agreement Neil no longer slept in the middle—it was always Sadie who acted as a buffer between the two adults

That night she went through near continuous nightmares, though the two adults barely even stirred as they had gotten used to her unstable sleeping patterns. In the morning, as was usual for Neil, he got up before the rest and left the tent, making no more noise that a whisper. His routine was to kill any stray zombie left over from the night before, using his trusty axe if they weren't too big, or the bow from afar if they were particularly large or aggressive.

When Sadie first laid eyes on the bow she had practically squealed in delight—which turned into near instantaneous disappointment when she found out that she was too weak to draw back on the cable. Even Sarah couldn't budge it, and from that point on it became Neil's official weapon, despite that he wasn't very good with it…or so Sarah thought.

The morning they began their assault on St Louis Neil demonstrated that he had progressed as an archer. The two women woke to a sizzle and the smell of cooking meat.

“What is that?” Sadie asked, her breath a grey plume in the morning chill air. “Is that meat? Is that a fire?”

Neil, looking more pale than usual smiled up at them as proud as can be. “It's rabbit. I shot a big one this morning.”

“Aren't you worried about stiffs?” Sarah asked, looking out into the distance as she came down the ladder. “Or the army? We're only seventy or so miles from the Island. This is well within their range.”

He shrugged and waived a hand. “I say pish posh on the army. The fire isn't all that smoky and besides we should be gone in twenty minutes. And I figured you two deserved a treat.”

“I have been a good girl,” Sadie said and then quickly amended the statement at Sarah's look. “I was a good girl yesterday. I didn't sic any monsters on nobody.”

“On anybody,” Sarah corrected, staring at the spread Neil had made for them. Along with the rabbit he had a can of corn frying in oil they had found the day before. Glasses of clean water were set out next to plates and silverware. These sat around the fire at three spots where blankets and couch cushions had been hauled down from the house.

“Why don't you two go have a talk and I'll breakdown the tent. The food should be done by then.” Work of any sort never fazed the man. He would do dishes, roll sleeping bags, haul water, carry all the baggage, without ever a word of complaint, and by the time the two women came back—one holding the axe and the other the M16—Neil had them ready to go on a moment's notice.

Sadie moaned and groaned her way through the meal and when she was done she rubbed her slightly swollen belly and belched loudly. Sarah and Neil glanced at each other, wondering which of them would correct her. They were both full for once and a little sleepy and only smiled at each other.

“What's up?” Sadie asked. “Are neither of you going to say anything? I just burped like a pig and all you two are doing is smiling. Have you given up on raising me so soon? What happened to: A girl needs structure? And all that crap you two spun the other day?”

“Eh, you know what you did wrong,” Neil said. “Now you're just looking for attention.”

“I can't win with you two can I?” Sadie replied though she smiled as she did. She tried to belch again, but it was a tiny thing that only made her laugh. “I vote Neil cooks every morning.”

Sarah shook her head at this. “My father always insisted that if he went out hunting, then mother would have to do the cooking. I think it's a good rule. Have you ever hunted before, Neil?”

This brought a snort from Sadie. “Yeah, right. He's from Jersey. Men there don't hunt. I mean really, anyone who says pish posh probably cried when he had to kill poor thumper here.”

Neil's eyes stole to Sarah before he admitted, “I didn't cry, but gutting it wasn't exactly fun. Now, Sadie, since you seem to be energized enough to run your mouth so much you can help me lug this stuff down to the boat.”

Every day before sundown, when the zombies really seemed to go active, they did their level best to camouflage the boat on the off chance that someone would come by and notice what a treasure it was. The night before they had pulled it far up a muddy little tributary and now they freaked when they saw it was gone.

“It was right here,” Neil said pointing. “See the weeds, how short they are? I pulled them up, remember?”

Sarah remembered. She could even see their footprints on the bank where they had gone up. “Do you think it was the army?” It was her greatest fear to be found by the colonel's men. It was even greater than her fear of the zombies, because the zombies would only eat her—the colonel would have her degrade herself first, would turn her into something less than a person and when he had used her, then he would set her out to die.

Sadie who had loped off downstream, came back breathing easily. “It floated away. I can see it further that on. We should get an anchor don’t you think? Come on! Last one there has to sit by Neil.” She took off in sprint that was slowed by her giggling. Despite that the adults were separated at night, Sadie made sure they kept close all day long.

Thankfully the propellers of the boat had got caught up in the submerged roots of a naked willow or they would've lost the boat for sure. After a bit of tugging they got the boat loose and set out for St Louis thinking it would be bad, but not understanding the true nature that awaited them.

Like a few other unfortunate places in the world, St Louis sat in a convergence zone where waves of undead migrated to from all parts of the country, only to rebound once they got there. Generally they headed back the way they came, however some were more determined to get to where they were going and tried hard to cross the Mississippi from one direction or another.

Very few made it—the rest turned the mighty river into a death trap. Unaware of this, Neil piloted the boat, moving at a good clip until the Illinois met the Mississippi and then he only slowed out of fear of attracting unwanted attention from the many stiffs walking the banks of the river on both sides.

These numbers grew as they approached the first of the suburbs north of the city and the three hunkered down low in the boat, hoping not to draw attention to themselves and to remain unobserved. This hope went out the window as they drew closer and closer to the center of the city.


They passed under bridges where it began to rain zombies and then when Neil kicked the boat faster, the beasts on the banks waded out into the wide river to get at them. Still the three were only unnerved and not yet afraid, because the zombies were dreadful swimmers. It wasn't until they began to knock into floating corpses ahead that they really knew fear.

The river was clogged with them.

“We have to fend them off or they'll get caught up in the props,” Neil said in a whisper. “Sarah you steer.” He and Sadie went to the narrow front and started the grizzly job of pushing the bodies away. Nothing could be more disgusting than touching the bloated corpses, even with a paddle…except, perhaps touching a bloated zombie corpse.

Sadie yelped and jumped back, nearly falling into the water. “It took my paddle! They're alive.” The things in the water were slow and ponderous, but still very much alive in their vile ways and in moments they were clawing at the hull of the boat. “We're going to sink!” the girl cried in a panic. “We have to turn back.”

Sarah was thinking the same thing, only behind them the river congealed with the bodies, some coming up from the black depths, covered in sticks and mud. “I don't think we can.”

“Turn the boat! Turn the boat!” cried Sadie, retreating to the center of the tiny vessel and drawing her hands in from the sides as if that would save her.

“Don't do it…” began Neil, but Sarah was already throttling up the engine and turning the boat sideways to the current. It was a mistake. The boat yawed to port and the zombies on that side gained more of a purchase and now the tipping became pronounced—allowing even more of the grey hands to grab a hold of the edge of the little fishing boat.

Sadie screamed and Sarah froze not knowing what to do as Mississippi water poured into the boat. They were going to capsize.

Neil jumped to his feet and leapt to the high side of the boat where his weight was just enough to keep it from flipping. In his hand was the M16 with its pathetic five bullets—he used four of them to clear the stiffs fighting their way on board. With their weight removed the boat plunged back down.

As most small men were, he was nimble and danced among the baggage without falling in. “Downstream! Point us that way,” he ordered. “Sadie, use the hatchet.”

In the front, Neil used the axe, hacking at the hands that gripped the grey metal, while the girl in the middle wacked here and there, taking off fingers which began to litter the inside of the boat. Sarah turned the boat sharply feeling bodies bump along beneath, making her want to puke.

“Is it clear in front?” she asked, desperate to gun the engine and run free of the horrible city.

“There's a channel,” Neil said pointing to the left. “There's less of em'.”

She could see what he was talking about, a long narrow channel where the water was clear of the bodies and strangely lighter in color as well. She opened up the throttle as far as it would go and the boat sped forward. Too late, Neil cried, “Turn!”

Sarah saw it as well, there was a capsized boat just beneath the surface. It was a barge of some sort and the little fishing boat ran up on it with a jolt, a scream of metal and a hard clang beneath her hand. Their momentum added to that of the barge and the pair of boats begun to swing sideways and once again the zombies came at them, clawing their way onto the barge where it was more stable.

“Get us off!” Neil ordered in a high voice.

Sarah tried. She stoked the gas and though it made more noise and kicked out plumes of grey-blue smoke it didn't do anything more. “There's something wrong with the engine. I don't know what.”

“Dang it!” Neil cried in desperation as he jumped out of the boat and onto the barge where the zombies were scrambling to get at them. Almost immediately the boat tipped upwards in front. “Sadie get to the back with Sarah…please,” he begged. The beasts, though slipping and falling with every other step were getting closer. When she did the boat tipped even more and Neil, using all of his puny strength was just able to push it off the barge and leap back aboard at the same time.

“Are we alright?” Neil asked, shaking like a leaf and grabbing his axe again with white knuckles.

“We're not alright,” Sarah said in a whisper, staring down into water. “The propeller is gone.”

The engine was now useless, except to draw the creatures to them and so she cut it and they drifted among the bodies. The sudden silence seemed to confuse the zombies.

“What are we going to…” Sadie began, but both Neil and Sarah shushed her. He put his finger to his lips and then motioned them to get low in the boat, just as another grey hand reached over the metal edge. He found a knife and pried the hand away, trying to be as quiet as possible about it…and then they drifted down river in a fearful silence that was broken only by the beasts bumping into the boat or trying to climb aboard and each time Neil pried away the fingers or sawed at them with the sharp blade.

They laid in the boat and as long as they didn't move or say a word the zombies forgot they were there and so they drifted among the corpses and the water moaned in a dreadful way and each wore an expression of fear. After a few hours of this the rain came, drenching them until Neil covered the women with layers of blankets and the two cuddled together for warmth while he sat without heat. Their hope was that the river would open up and the zombies would grow fewer on the banks and in the water, so that they would be able to get ashore somewhere.

Instead things only grew worse. The zombies grew so thick that their pace slowed and although they went past St Louis they were still stuck in the middle of the wide river. Eventually they came to a bridge that had collapsed and the river beneath was clogged with sunken barges and overturned day yachts and frothed with the bodies of thousands of zombies. The little fishing boat bounced off of something beneath them and spun sideways, coming up against a long white bay liner, whose captain was grey and putrefying and hungry.

The creature launched itself at Neil and he shot it with his last bullet and then he hacked with the axe as more zombies appeared on the pile of stranded boats and now there was no more hiding. Sadie sprung up with her hatchet and fought like a demon, while Sarah grabbed the M16.

Turning it around she clubbed first one, then another and was able to get a fix on their situation—they were buying themselves seconds only. Not only were they surrounded by dozens of zombies, the zombies themselves were surrounded by hundreds more.