“SEIZE THEM AT ONCE!” she yelled. “AND OFF WITH BOTH THEIR HEEAAA—”
Before the Queen of Hearts could finish her sentence, the Tin Woodman swung his axe with all his might and chopped the queen’s head off. Again, just as with the other literary villains, the only thing that spewed out of her body was words. All the adjectives, adverbs, verbs, and nouns Lewis Carroll used to describe the unpleasant monarch sprayed out of the queen’s neck. Eventually, the words dried up and the Queen of Hearts’ dismembered body disappeared.
“He’s murdered our queen!” a card soldier shouted.
“He’ll pay for this!” shouted another.
The card soldiers charged toward the Tin Woodman and Trollbella, but just as they were about to be pierced by the soldiers’ weapons, everyone in the park was suddenly distracted by a bright light in the sky. The Tin Woodman and Trollbella looked up and saw that the BASK-8 had finally arrived!
The Cyborg Queen and Commander Newters observed the park from the window of the Command Bridge.
“I believe this is the park we’ve been looking for, Your Majesty,” Commander Newters said. “Oh yes, this is definitely Washington Square Park, I can see it’s filled with the boxy soldiers we agreed to defeat.”
“This city has more square parks than all my planets combined,” the Cyborg Queen said. “Anyhoo, I can see we’re a little tardy. Send the Cyborgs to assist the metallic lumberjack and his vertically challenged friend.”
“Yes, ma’am,” Commander Newters said, and turned to the Cyborg soldiers. “You heard the queen—to the park!”
A wide door opened across the Bask-8’s belly, and thousands of Cyborgs glided into Washington Square Park. They descended using jetpacks, Hoverboards, and personal propellers. Before engaging in combat, the Cyborgs’ first order of business was to transport the Tin Woodman and Trollbella to the top of the Washington Square Arch. Once they were safe, the Cyborgs wreaked havoc on the card soldiers.
The Wonderland natives were skilled fighters, but they were no match for the Cyborgs’ laser guns, gamma bombs, and rocket launchers. It wasn’t long before the cards surrendered and were taken aboard the BASK-8 as the Cyborgs’ prisoners.
As the battle ended, the Tin Woodman sat on the edge of the tall arch and let out a big sigh.
“What’s wrong?” Trollbella asked.
“I’ve always been hollow, but for the first time in my life I feel truly empty inside,” the Tin Woodman said. “I always thought a heart would fill the void, but now that I know I’ve had one all along, I’m not sure what to do with myself.”
The Tin Woodman’s dilemma was Trollbella’s dream come true. She stared in wonder at the most beautiful sight she had ever seen: an emotionally mature, vulnerable, and needy man. The Troblin Queen had a seat beside the Tin Woodman and longingly gazed up at him, batting her eyes.
“You know, I fit perfectly inside your chest,” she remarked. “Perhaps I’m the heart you’ve been searching for.”
Trollbella put her tiny hand into his and rested her horns on his shoulder. In that moment the Tin Woodman was certain he had a heart, because the troll girl’s touch made him blush.
Rat Mary and the witches flew through New York City as erratically as possible, but nothing threw off their determined followers. Lester, Jack, and Goldilocks soared after the witches as they dangerously zigzagged between buildings, looped around skyscrapers, and dived under bridges. Absolutely nothing was going to stop the daring parents from retrieving their son.
Lester was gaining more and more ground with each passing second. Soon they were in reaching distance of the bristles on the last witch’s broom.
“I’ve got an idea,” Jack told his wife and the gander. “We’ll follow the witches to that cluster of buildings in the distance, but when we get there, we’ll go around that green tower and cut them off before they reach the—”
Before Jack could finish unripping his plan, Goldilocks sprang into action with a plan of her own. She leaped off Lester’s back and landed on the broomstick of the closest witch. Goldilocks fought the witch for control of the broom. Just as the witch was about to zap her with a magic spell, Goldilocks punched the witch in the face, and she landed in the East River.
Goldilocks gripped the broomstick tightly with both hands. She had never ridden on a witch’s broom before, and it took her a moment to figure out how to work it. She was pleasantly surprised to learn that riding a magic broomstick was very similar to riding a horse. When she leaned forward, the broom zoomed ahead, and when she pulled up on the handle, the broom slowed down. Once she felt confident, she turned to Jack and Lester flying beside her and filled them in on her plan.
“I’m going to work my way to the front of the witches,” she told them. “Then I’m going to hop aboard Rat Mary’s broom and get Hero.”
“Be careful, Goldie!” Jack said.
“Careful never got me anywhere,” she said with a wink.
The courageous mother leaned forward, and the broomstick’s speed gradually increased. As she flew past the witches, Goldilocks did whatever she could to knock them out of the sky. She slammed into them and shoved them off their brooms, she pulled the witches’ hair so they’d fall backward into the city, and she kicked their brooms’ handles and sent them spinning out of control. Finally, the only ones left in the flying procession were Goldilocks, Rat Mary, and Hero.
Goldilocks snuck up right behind Rat Mary’s broom, then jumped off her own and landed beside the witch.
“Give me back my son!” she demanded.
“Why do breeders get so attached to their young?” Rat Mary screeched. “You can just make another one, you know!”
The witch twisted and looped through the air, she dipped and made sharp turns, she even flew upside down at one point—but nothing knocked Goldilocks off the broom. The vigorous movement only rocked Hero to sleep.
“Gosh, you’re relentless!” Rat Mary said. “Here! Just take the little rug rat! I’ll find another one!”
The witch sliced the strap of the BabyBj?rn with her sharp fingernail. The contraption slid off the witch’s body and fell toward the ground with Hero inside it. Goldilocks dived off Rat Mary’s broomstick and caught her son in midair. The mother and child fell thousands of feet through the air. A few seconds before they would have hit the ground, Lester swooped under them and they landed safely in Jack’s arms.
“Curses!” Rat Mary said. “I was hoping for a splat!”
Ironically, the witch wasn’t watching where she was going and slammed headfirst into the Flatiron Building. The messy impact made one thing abundantly clear: Rat Mary’s kid-snatching, broom-riding, potion-brewing days were over.
Jack and Goldilocks were overjoyed to finally have Hero back in their arms. The happy couple embraced their newborn son, and Lester carried the reunited family back toward Central Park to find their friends.
CHAPTER TWENTY
TIMES SQUARE SQUARE-OFF