She came again, and I growled, letting myself follow. “I love you,” I said against her lips.
Her big green eyes stared into mine; I knew what she was thinking. The pain was back in her eyes, and I knew she was flashing back to the image of me, a drunk dumbass with that blonde on my lap. I hated to see the pain in her eyes, but there it was, slapping me in the face.
Dumbass, dumbass, dumbass!
“I love you too,” she whispered.
I rolled us until we were facing each other, our legs tangled together, our bodies still connected, her breasts pressed against my chest. I wound my hand in her dark hair, pulling her towards me as I leaned into her. Our lips connected, our tongues intertwined, but the passion that was so strong earlier was now suddenly absent.
“We need to talk about last night.”
Again?
There it was, the thing I’d been dreading and hoping we’d moved past. I mentally cursed, and my cock shriveled up and worked its way out of her body without any resistance. I rolled to my back, let out a long sigh and struggled for what I could possibly say to make things better.
There was nothing. I already told her what happened and that I was sorry… wasn’t that enough?
Her finger traced the outline of my belly button. It tickled and made me flinch. “Calvin, we really need to talk,” she said softly.
Fuck. Damn. Shit.
No, I didn’t think that was necessary at all. What was there to talk about, really? Hadn’t we already said what needed to be said less than a half hour ago? Had she forgotten already? Was I going to have to grovel for days?
I rolled to my side, leaned in, and kissed her softly on the nose. “Baby, I know I fucked up,” I admitted. “It won’t happen again, I promise.”
I rolled toward the edge of the mattress and sat up with my feet on the floor. The feel of her hand on my back was warm but somehow caused cold chills to make me shudder. I stood up, walked into the bathroom and turned on the shower. Practice started in an hour and I had to go. Even if I wanted to, which I didn’t, there wasn’t time to talk. Not now. Especially after we’d already said everything that needed to be said. Hadn’t we?
After a quick shower, I pulled on a pair of basketball shorts and a t-shirt, stuffed my clothes for the day into my duffle, and leaned down to give her a kiss goodbye. “I’m going to be late for practice,” I stated and watched her beautiful green eyes fill with disappointment and pain.
My jaw tightened. She knew I had practice every day, so why the sad eyes? It was my job now. A great paying job that could buy her just about anything she wanted.
“What am I supposed to do?” she asked, her voice leaning toward a whine. I exhaled a long breath, then reached into my wallet and pulled out my gold card.
“Go shopping, see the city, come by practice if you want.” Please God, let that appease her. It was obvious it hadn’t when she refused to take the card from my hand. I set it on the bed beside her and apologized — again — for my actions. “We’ll talk tonight, I promise.”
A sinking feeling lodged in my heart as I walked down the stairs of my apartment building. The sunshine was bright and the day beautiful, but a gloom enveloped me that I just couldn’t shake.
How was I going to fix this? Could it even be fixed?
It was a relief to be in the locker room; chatter surrounded me and echoed off the walls. My mind was washed of the misery I left at home and now occupied with baseball, just baseball.
“Hey man, how are you doing?” Marty asked, his hand pushed hard on my shoulder. I turned and smiled, trying not to notice the real concern in his eyes. “I mean, she looked pretty pissed last night,” he continued to push my misery back into focus.
“Yes, she was pissed, but, we worked it out,” I lied.
“Glad to hear that. I worried all night that she left you in a ditch somewhere,” he said and then pounded a fist on my back again.
It was nice that he was concerned; he seemed like a good guy. Ace, on the other hand, was quick to make it clear how he felt. “There wasn’t anything to work out, she needs to get a grip on her emotions.” He spouted his opinion whether anyone wanted it or not. At the moment, I did not.
“She just got into town, I really shouldn’t have stayed,” I said, feeling the need to defend her. “She’s a good girl, she didn’t deserve that.” Marty patted me on the back and murmured what sounded like an agreement. Ace quickly puffed out his chest and made a face.
“You’re not just a man now, hot shot, you’re a Beast, and beasts have large appetites,” Ace roared, beating on his chest like King Kong as he spoke. He laughed and his lips curled into a crooked smile. “I told you having a girl isn’t a good idea. There are plenty of pussies ripe for the plucking. Why stay with one, especially when she’s trying to tame you?”
“Tame me?” I laughed and found my damn smile unable to control. His actions were funny as hell, and I still idolized this man, even if he did get me into a pile of shit last night with Whitney.
“Yes, sir, there is no taming the beast!” he boasted and jumped onto a chair near our lockers. “Who among us are men?” he shouted. Everyone stopped, looked in his direction. “Who among us are beasts?” he shouted even louder. Everyone roared as he spoke, and his arms rose high above his head, his body swaying slowly from side to side as if he were talking to his people, and he, of course, was their king. “I can’t hear you!” he screamed, directing his attention to me. “Are you a man or a beast, hot shot?”
The energy around me was contagious. “I’m a beast,” I said.
“A what?” he asked, cupping his hand to his ear.
“A beast!” I screamed out.
“Fuck yeah you are!” he shouted and hopped down from his pedestal.
Even Marty was smiling. Ace had a way of getting you fired up over anything. I was pretty sure he could get us all chanting about hemorrhoid cream if he wanted to.
Coach Griffin walked into the locker room with a clipboard in his hand and a whistle around his neck. He blew it twice to get everyone’s attention. I shook my head, thinking how much easier Ace got everyone quieted down than the coach. We went over the details of our practice and then he yelled for us to get out on the field.
We all spread out and stretched before pairing up to basically play catch before starting batting practice. The stands had several fans there to watch, including a beautiful blonde with large blue eyes. She stared at me so intently that it made me nervous.
“Looks like you got a fresh one on the line.” Ace slapped me on the back as he spoke.
I laughed it off and ran to my position, waiting for him to toss the ball. I could feel her eyes on me the entire time, even though I refused to look in her direction. Batting practice started, and I took my spot on the mound.