Especially the one I’d made for our son.
She clutched the lanky bear, holding it close to her huge belly where Brendon grew. Her tank top was pushed up so that big bump was bare, her skin pulled taut, rivers of stretch marks forever signed on her skin. I was lying just a little lower than her, arms wrapped around both of them.
“Make it if you want it to matter.” I chuckled softly as I repeated my mom’s mantra. Kenzie did the same, those brown eyes warm and contented.
I ran my fingertips over the bear. It was an inconsistent pattern of blues, deep navy all the way down to ghost white. It was sewn with sapphire yarn, the pattern a little off because my hands could never quite get it right. Not the way my mother had mastered.
“It’s not very pretty, but they’re supposed to represent a family being stitched together by a new birth. Each piece of fabric represents the people who make up that family, the yarn the love that binds it all together. Mom says they’re good luck.”
Mom had always been a little out there. Subscribing to a kind of faith I wasn’t sure I could ever have. But I sure couldn’t disagree with her on this.
Kenzie whispered, “Your mom’s amazing.”
“She loves you,” I told her.
Fingertips brushed down my face. “Because I love you.”
Brendon kicked against my hand, and I couldn’t contain the force of my smile as I pressed my mouth to her belly, the crazy amount of love palpitating within my heart. Shaking me all the way through. Seemed impossible to love someone I hadn’t even met. Not the way I loved him.
Less than two months and he’d be here.
God, I couldn’t wait.
“Come on, man, it’s a one-time thing. Once. It’s not gonna hurt anything.”
I slid out from under the car I was working on. Ash sat above me on a stool, grinning with those dimples like I was some chick who couldn’t resist his charm.
Idiot.
Still, I smiled, shaking my head. Because hell, I’d missed him. Had missed them all, that piece of my family that no longer quite fit.
“No can do, my friend. I’ve got a shit-ton to do and…well…”
Didn’t finish up the rest.
Didn’t need to.
All of them knew why I had to keep my distance.
Ash rubbed his hand over his face. “Listen, man, I totally get your reservations, but Justin totally bailed. We’ve gone through like five guitarists since you. And this show is big. Word is, house is gonna be crawling with labels and agents. We need you.”
I wiped my hands with a greasy rag, feeling bad, knowing I’d left them in a jam.
“Five hundred bucks, Lyrik. Five hundred bucks for one night and you can walk. You know there’s not a soul who’s ever gonna fill your shoes. But I promise, we’ll figure our shit out from there. We just can’t miss out on this chance.”
Five hundred dollars.
I could get that crib for Kenz, the one she’d been eyeing, the one we sure as shit couldn’t afford. She’d settled on the bassinet my mom had given us. It’d work fine. For now.
Ash could sense my interest, my slow surrender, and he jumped on it. “One night,” he promised.
I pinned him with a glare. “One night.”
Sebastian clapped me on the back before he pulled me into a hug. “Lyrik…holy shit, man, I’ve missed the hell outta you.”
“Shit, I’ve missed you, too,” I said, grinning wide as I stepped back to take in the venue. It was bigger than anything we’d ever played, backstage set up like we were royalty, dressing rooms, bottled water, and a bar full of booze.
Okay, so maybe not royalty.
But sure as shit better than the holes we’d been playing the last three years.
The vibe was intense. I watched a little wide-eyed as roadies ran around to get things set up for the headlining band. A band I’d actually learned to play my guitar to when I was thirteen, sitting in my room and picking out the chords to some of their songs.
Never in a million years would I have imagined one day we’d be opening for them.
Loud music pumped from the speakers, people rushing this way and that.
Muted light seem to thrum with the beat.
My heart latched on to it, this awesome feeling spreading fast.
This had to be one of the coolest things to ever happen in my life.
Totally fucking surreal.
Ash was right.
This was an opportunity that couldn’t be missed.
I shucked off the guilt trying to gain its voice, that little white lie sitting like a rock in the pit of my stomach. One I’d told Kenzie so I could get out of the apartment tonight, not to mention the fact I’d had to sneak my guitar into the trunk of my car while she’d been taking a nap.
My little sister needs me, baby. She’s been having a rough time at school. Gonna hang with her a bit. One on one.
I just didn’t want her to worry, and if she knew where I really was, she would.
Ash was jumping around, completely stoked. “Everyone ready to go on?”
“Hell yeah,” Baz replied, slanting me a glance. “Feels like a reunion…way it’s supposed to be…with Lyrik here.”