When I Lost You: A Gripping, Heart Breaking Novel of Lost Love.

‘And the top floor?’


‘That’s my office,’ I led the way up the last flight of stairs to my favourite room in the house – my favourite place in the whole world, actually. It was a small room, half the size of the floors which housed the bedroom and living areas, and the east-facing wall featured a large peaked window that gave a view of the top of the jacaranda tree outside.

‘This room is beautiful.’

‘I like it.’

‘I’m starting to think you might like reading.’

‘What gives you that idea?’ I said wryly, and she released me to walk further into the room. I’d lined three of the four walls with bookshelves, and every space on every shelf was taken. My desk was in the centre of the room, facing towards the window, and beside it sat a comfortable but rather unattractive recliner I’d picked up at a charity shop when I was at uni. Molly wandered along the bookshelves, surveying my eclectic collection of travel books and novels and autobiographies.

‘Sometimes I think it would have been better if the bedroom and the office were reversed. I’ve probably overloaded this floor, maybe it’ll crash down on me while I sleep one night.’

‘Imagine that. You spend your entire life dodging bullets in the field but it’s your bookworm side that will get you killed.’ She laughed, and then turned to face me. ‘I really don’t know what you were so worried about, Leo. Your place is nice. It’s quaint.’ I raised an eyebrow at her. ‘It is,’ she insisted. ‘It’s a really cool little house.’

‘Want to head back downstairs and get better acquainted with my mutt? He’s due a walk.’

‘Not more walking,’ she groaned and shook her head. ‘No way, Leo! Let’s go downstairs and you can make me a coffee and I’ll sit and pat him.’



It felt strange having Molly Torrington sitting in my living area while I cooked dinner that night; stranger still that she and Lucien appeared to be bonding so quickly. I’d convinced her to walk him to the park with me, but as soon as we returned home she’d kicked off her shoes and curled up on the couch with the remote in her hand.

‘What do you want to watch?’

‘I don’t really…’

‘I was talking to Lucien,’ she interrupted me with a laugh. ‘I could tell you wouldn’t have an opinion purely from the amount of dust on this remote control. What do you do to relax?’

‘I don’t watch rubbish on TV, that’s for sure.’

‘You don’t know what you’re missing out on. The Bachelor is on tonight – will you watch it with me?’

‘What’s The Bachelor?’ I said. I was joking but I needn’t have bothered, given that Molly missed my pitiful attempt at humour anyway.

‘Leo! For such a well-travelled man you’re remarkably naive about the things that really matter.’

We watched the evening news – and then when the theme music to the reality TV show started Molly squealed in excitement. ‘I love this show!’

‘I wish you’d told me that before I slept with you,’ I sighed, and she laughed. She settled into my arms and then Lucien jumped onto the couch and made a place for himself, his head on her lap.

‘I’m only letting you sit there to impress Molly,’ I told him.

‘I’m already impressed,’ she said and turned back to brush a kiss over my lips.

I realised that I was in over my head with Molly when she convinced me to sit through an entire hour of reality TV. It was mind-numbing; the only entertaining aspect to the experience at all was her heart-felt explanations as to the background of what I was seeing in the show.

‘You’re an educated, cosmopolitan woman. A career woman,’ I said, during an ad break.

‘Yes.’

‘And the idea of a group of women all competing for the attention of a man just to win television ratings isn’t offensive to you? Even I want to storm that mansion and stage an intervention.’

‘It’s all good fun.’

‘But it’s demeaning.’

‘It’s all good fun, Leo,’ she repeated. ‘Those girls are getting exactly what they want – fifteen minutes of fame. No one is getting hurt. Lighten up, will you?’

‘But don’t you think that as a society…’

‘Leo, the ad break is over and now you need to be quiet again so I can explain to you what the rose ceremony is,’ she told me. I laughed, and heard the echo of her laughter too. ‘You just need to watch it some more and you’ll get it, I’m sure of it.’ When the credits rolled, Molly sat up and grinned at me expectantly.

‘Well, what did you think?’ she asked, when it was over.

I burst out laughing. ‘Well, I enjoyed having you here more than I hated the show so let’s call it a success but next time I might read while you watch it.’

‘Next time,’ she repeated softly, and playfully leant in to kiss me, which soon took on an urgent, passionate edge that wasn’t to be deterred. She pulled impatiently at the bottom of my shirt, feeling for the bare skin of my chest.

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