We take each other in, panting, mad with lust. My eyes home in on the mole on his collarbone, the mole I somehow missed during our previous encounters. I reach out and touch it and then splay my hand over his chest, feeling the tattoo of his heartbeats on my palm. I watch the interplay of his abdominal muscles as he sucks in deep breaths, throwing the lines of his ribs in sharp relief.
If I focus really hard, I can pretend we’re two people in love. This is what happens when your love is requited. You control each other; you live for each other.
He grabs my arms and yanks them over my head, then takes off my barely-there cami. Now I’m as naked as him, shivering under the deluge of goosebumps.
His hands close over my breasts and knead the flesh. My breath picks up, and so does my heart. I feel it ballooning in my chest, pressing against my ribcage. My arousal seems bigger than me right now. The more he massages my achy tits, the more restless I become. I rock my lower body, grazing the head of his cock with my stomach, making him grunt.
Letting go of my breasts and moving away, Thomas grabs the back of my neck and pushes me toward the bed. I go down willingly, until my elbows hit the messy sheets and I’m on my knees, my butt in the air.
He moves behind me, palming my ass, massaging and kneading. A slew of tingles pools down my lower back, spreads over my flesh. That dark, uncharted hole clenches.
Moisture dribbles down my core and along my inner thighs. Thomas swoops it up with a finger, bringing it to my pussy and painting it over my dripping lips.
Mini jerks float down my body, making me hump the air. I look behind to find Thomas focusing on the movements of his finger. His brow is furrowed as he adds his other hand to the mix, inserting a thick digit inside my core. He stretches my tight hole and my swollen lips using his fingers and thumbs. My cheeks are parted and I’m exposed to his eyes.
But I can see he isn’t happy. He wants more. It’s in the way his body shifts with impatience.
His nails dig into my ass as he stretches me farther. The tight ring of my asshole pops open; I can feel it. I can feel my pussy gushing and dousing me in a weird combination of arousal and shame. Then he does something that throws me into a different stratosphere of lust.
His lips pucker and he spits on my asshole. As soon as the warm liquid hits me, my hips twitch. Thick, knotted ropes inside my lower tummy unravel, and I almost come, falling on the bed, face first.
“Can you feel how tight you are here?” His fingers work to lubricate me, spreading his spit over my tight ring, all the while playing with my other hole. “I knew you would be. I know you won’t rest until I completely lose my mind over how tight and untouched you are.”
He stops playing with my pussy and focuses only on my ass now. He inserts his wet thumb and a tiny crumb of pain darts through my spine. It screams that I want this. I want him to take my ass and be my first.
Arching my hips, I rest my cheek on the soft bed. I bring my arms back and put them on my ass cheeks, helping him stretch my hole.
“Fuck,” he curses on a shuddering breath. “You’re trying to kill me.”
“No,” I mumble into the sheet, suddenly extremely horny and shy. “I’m trying to get you to fuck me already.”
A pained laugh escapes him. “Yeah, I’ll be dead before this is over.”
Now that I hold myself open for him, he lets go and palms his cock. It hits my ass, the heat of it seeping into my skin. He spits again, this time on his head, and rubs the saliva all over his shaft. The view of it is hidden behind my raised ass but I can imagine his rod shining, the foreskin sliding up and down, creating the magnificent friction I feel when he flicks my clit.
The flex of his biceps relaxes as he halts the movement and looks up at me. I bite my lip, my chest fluttering up and down with anticipatory breaths.
With his eyes, he tells me he is ready to take me. No words pass between us. This moment is too big for words. It can only be described in actions. He is going to claim the last part of me now.
Thomas grips my waist with one hand, keeping me in one place, and with the other, nudges the head of his cock against my dark, tiny entrance. He pushes in, trying to breach the compact ring of muscles. It’s hard, a struggle, during which I squirm and scrunch my eyes shut, and he breathes in loud pants. Then a pop sounds and he is in.
The sting of it. The pressure of it. I feel it fanning over my entire ass and spine. Hissing, I buck my hips, almost dislodging him, but he tightens his grip around my waist and keeps me steady.
He keeps sliding his cock in, and I swear I hear the muscles stretching, peeling away from each other. Oh God. Tears form as I breathe through my nose, trembling with pain.
This was a bad idea. Bad. Bad. Bad.
“Shh…” Thomas caresses my spine with his other arm, trying to soothe my skittish body. “It’s gonna be okay. It’s gonna be okay. I’ll take care of you.”
“Is it…all in?” I whimper.
“No, baby, not yet.” He whooshes out a long breath. His strong thighs vibrate against the back of mine, telling the tale of his control and exertion.
That slip of his tongue, that casually thrown in endearment makes me open my eyes and look at him. Every hollow and crevice of his body stands taut and highlighted. He appears to be made of stone. My fire-breather. My stone god.
And I’m his baby. Baby.
His head is dipped as if in prayer, his brow furrowed as if he can’t afford to lose control and hurt me in the process, but I don’t care anymore. I want him however I can get him.
“It hurts,” I tell him in a small voice.
His body jerks and his hazy eyes lift up. I pop my thumb into my mouth and suck on it, imagining it’s his cock that I’m using as a sucker, like a good girl.
I play his favorite game one last time and his nostrils flare. He suddenly grows larger, bigger, tenser. I smile on the inside when his sweat-slicked palms grab both sides of my hips and he pushes through. I bite my thumb, moan around it, and close my eyes. The pain is excruciating but as I surrender to it, I realize it ebbs in slow measures.
Thomas grunts as he bottoms out, the coarse hair around his cock prickling the smooth skin of my ass. I imagine him watching me suck on my thumb, being still, being good for him. My heart pounds as I picture him gathering himself once again to pull out so he can push back in, smoothing his way through my tight chamber.
He unclenches one hand and brings it to my clit, strumming the bundled-up button. My hips buck again, but as always, Thomas keeps me balanced. While playing with my clit and making my pussy bleed cream for him, he withdraws almost fully then pushes back in. He huffs and I grunt.
Sweat pools on my back, skates down to my neck, tickling me. Moaning, I rub my heavy breasts on the soft bed, seeking friction for my engorged nipples as Thomas finds his slow but confident rhythm. The pain is there, but it’s bearable, pleasurable even.
One last time, he tells me a story, dirty and pornographic. He tells me how tight I am, how amazing I feel. He tells me men would kill to get inside my pussy, my ass—it doesn’t matter which.