“Oh, that’s not necessary.”
But Charlotte was already packing a small bundle. She knew Ruby’s ration cards were for only one person, and that surely wasn’t enough to feed this man. She thrust the package at him and said, “Please. It’s the least I can do. If not for you, then for Ruby. The cheese is from the countryside. A friend of my papa brought it. But I know Papa would want you to have it, for helping my maman.”
He hesitated, then nodded, accepting the food as she walked him toward the front hall. “May I ask you another question?” The pilot paused with his hand on the door. “Are you Jewish? Is that why you couldn’t go for help?”
Charlotte stared at him. Her father had said she wasn’t supposed to volunteer her Judaism to anyone who might hurt her. But she knew that this man would never do that. “Yes.”
“One day, things will be different,” he said after a very long pause. “We’re going to win this war, Charlotte. In the meantime, just hold on. Don’t lose sight of who you are.”
And then, before she could reply, he had slipped into the hallway. She watched him from her doorway until he was safely inside Ruby’s apartment.
CHAPTER NINETEEN
October 1941
“Ruby?” Aubert’s eyes were wide with alarm as Ruby entered Café Michel on the rue de Bourgogne just past noon. She had racked her brain all night trying to think where she might find him, and finally, she had remembered Marcel mentioning the place in passing, back when the Nazis first entered Paris. Aubert sometimes stopped there, Marcel had said once before abruptly falling silent, as if he’d said something wrong. Ruby had barely noticed it at the time, but in retrospect, she was sure he’d revealed something he wasn’t supposed to. In any case, here Aubert sat, in the back of the café. There were Nazi soldiers dining nearby, talking, laughing, their plates piled with meat, bread, and vegetables, their glasses full of wine. She hated them with a ferocity that surprised her.
“Hello, Aubert,” she said, impressing herself with how calm she sounded.
His eyes widened further. “It’s Philippe,” he corrected. “Surely you have me confused with someone else.”
She stared at him for a moment before she understood. He was using an alias. Had Marcel had one too? There were so many things she didn’t know. “Yes, of course. Philippe. My mistake.”
“Not a problem.” His smile was unnaturally stiff. “Would you like to take a stroll?” He was already placing a few coins on the table before she could respond. He grabbed her arm and led her out of the café.
“What in the hell are you doing here?” he demanded in a whisper as soon as they were on the street.
“Trying to find you.”
“Ruby.” He sighed and withdrew a handkerchief from his pocket, blotting at the sweat that had beaded on his forehead. “Your husband was executed for aiding Allied fugitives, in case you’ve forgotten. You could have led the Nazis straight to me!”
“I wasn’t followed.”
“You approached me in a café right under the Germans’ noses!”
“You were sitting in a café right under the Germans’ noses,” Ruby pointed out.
“Part of my cover. I’m a collaborator, as far as they know. You can’t just put that in peril.”
“You need to listen to me.” She was sick of being chided. “I’m sheltering an RAF pilot.”
All at once, he went very still. “Pardon?”
“He showed up five days ago, looking for Marcel. He had a bad infection and a high fever. He’s on the mend, but he needs to get back to England.” There was a lump in her throat as she said the words.
“He just appeared at your door?”
Ruby nodded. She tried not to think of how vulnerable Thomas had looked when he collapsed in the hall. “He’d heard about the escape line from another pilot who made it home safely.”
“Damn it!” Aubert’s face turned red. “They’re not supposed to talk about the details.”
Ruby remained silent until Aubert calmed down. “I need to connect Thomas—the pilot—to someone who can help him get out of Paris. And after that, I want to help. I want to help on the escape line.”
“That’s ridiculous, Ruby. You can’t help.”
She flinched. “How can you say that? I’m already helping.”
“Marcel said you meant well, but that’s not enough, Ruby.”
“There’s much more to me than good intentions.”
Aubert stared at her for a moment. “Marcel also said you were careless. I’m sorry.”
The words hit their mark. “Yes, well, Marcel was wrong about a lot of things. You know that as well as I do. He was hot-tempered and rash, and I’m not.”
Aubert didn’t say anything for a long time. “It’s dangerous work, Ruby.”
“You think I don’t know the risks?”
Aubert sighed and put his hands up in a gesture of defeat. “I’ll send someone to pick up your pilot tomorrow. If all goes well, we can talk. But I make no promises.”
She nodded, struggling to keep a straight face. “How will I know that the person who arrives tomorrow to retrieve the pilot is legitimate?”
“She will address you with a code name.”
She? So there were other women working on the line. Had Marcel worked side by side with them, treating them with respect while he belittled her? “A code name?”
“We all have one. It’s helpful not to know one another’s true identity.” He paused and studied her. “From now on, you’ll be Fleur.”
“Fleur?”
He smiled slightly. “Marcel said you were always talking about the poppy fields back home. Alors, now you have a chance to be your own flower.”
He whirled around and walked back into the café before she could say another word. She wasn’t sure whether the name was meant to mock her, but she liked it regardless. She allowed herself a tiny smile before turning in the opposite direction.
Fleur, she thought as she headed back toward her apartment. She who blooms in the midst of the darkness. She felt invincible as she walked past a cluster of Nazi soldiers at the corner of the rue de l’Université. One of them whistled at her, but she ignored him. She finally had a purpose, a reason for being here, but there was also a part of her that was full of regret.
Thomas. Sending him on his way was the right thing. There was no doubt about it, but Ruby knew her apartment would feel empty without him. How was that possible? She’d only just met him.
You can’t think that way, she reminded herself as she hurried along, keeping her eyes straight ahead. You can’t get emotionally involved. But there was something different about Thomas, something she couldn’t quite put a finger on. And now perhaps she’d never know why she felt the way she did.
It was nearing dusk when she arrived home. “Hello?” she called when it seemed she was alone in the apartment. For a moment, her heart was in her throat. Had the authorities come for Thomas? Had something happened? But a moment later, he emerged from her wardrobe, looking sheepish.
“I heard someone and hid,” he said, running his right hand through his hair. “Sorry.”
“No. You did the right thing.”
“Where were you?” He paused and shook his head. “I’m sorry. That came out wrong. Not that I have any right to know. What I mean is, I was worried. Are you all right?”
“Actually, I went to meet with the man I told you about, the one my husband knew. And good news; he’s sending someone from the escape line to pick you up tomorrow.”
“Oh.”
“I thought you’d be excited.”
Thomas looked away. “I am. And I’m glad I won’t be a danger to you anymore. But—”
“But what?”
“But who will protect you if I’m not here?”
Ruby could feel her cheeks heating up. “You’re worried about me?”
He looked surprised. “Well, of course.”
“It’s been an awfully long time since anyone cared what happened to me.”
“It shouldn’t be that way, Ruby. I know I’ll always care, now that I’ve met you.”
Something inside of her felt like it was breaking open. “I’ll always care about what happens to you too.”