His shoulders rose with a deep breath, calming some of his fierce energy. “You do. You owe me.”
My hands dropped to my side, suddenly trembling from that dark promise. He turned around, changing his mind. He walked back to me, slowly, deliberately, trapping me between his hard, tall body and the solid wall of my car. His arms caged me in, pressing against either side of my head.
His chest barely brushed mine, hovering over me just enough to tease, to make me want closer contact, but denying me.
Just like I’d denied him.
I stared at him, waiting for him to do something. Say something. His green eyes held mine captive, flashing with thoughts I couldn’t read and emotions I couldn’t decipher.
Just when I’d decided to break the tension between us by speaking, he lifted his hand to my jaw and carefully cupped my face. His fingers were calloused and rough, cradling me with a softness that came from inside him, something you would never see on his outside.
“You like me, Vera. And if you haven’t figured it out yet, you should know I like you too. I like you a lot. Get over this ex-boyfriend of yours so we can explore where this thing between us goes.”
Before I could argue with him, his mouth dropped to mine, pressing a swift, intoxicating kiss to my lips. My eyes fluttered closed, and I drowned in sensation. Butterflies erupted in my belly, sending tingles soaring through my body, making my head swim and my toes curl. His beard brushed against my face, scratchy and soft at the same time. His lips lingered long enough for me to taste them, feel the shape of them, decide how perfectly they fit against mine.
He was gone just as soon as I’d decided to kiss him back. He stepped away from me, letting me slump against the car, disoriented and inwardly disheveled. He’d picked up all the pieces of me, all the puzzle pieces I’d been trying to sort through and put back together, and dropped them on the ground in a confused mess.
Nothing was where it was supposed to be now. Nothing fit like I thought it should.
“Bye, Vera.”
I didn’t even reply. I just watched him walk away while my knees wobbled and my heart tried to beat its way out of my chest.
Killian Quinn was nothing like I expected him to be. Charming when I wanted to be annoyed. Sensitive and thoughtful when I’d already decided he was only an asshole. Irresistible while I tried to do my best to resist him.
I was stubborn. Headstrong. Determined to see my isolation through.
But I was starting to realize he was more stubborn. More headstrong. More determined than I could ever be.
And that was very concerning.
Chapter Seventeen
The next Saturday night I’d perfected my shishito and skirt steak tacos. They were a huge hit.
I was super proud of them. And myself. Killian hadn’t stepped in once to offer his advice. Well, except for the lemon suggestion, but since that had happened before I tried out the recipe, I let myself believe I might have come up with that one all by myself had I been given the chance.
The thing about lying to myself was that I had been doing it for so long that I hardly noticed anymore.
And I’d been lying to myself a lot this week, so it was almost impossible to divide the lies from the truth at this point.
I hadn’t seen Killian since the Morning Market when I’d rejected his date request. I’d written him maybe three hundred texts, but deleted all of them before I accidentally pressed send. I’d also shown up to work way earlier than necessary in case I caught a glimpse of him, but he’d always been in his kitchen already. And unlike the weeks prior, he didn’t leave it.
Last night, I heard his motorcycle pull away from Lilou, but I’d been plating to-go boxes in the safety of my food truck. He hadn’t stopped by. And he hadn’t sent anyone to spy on me as far as I could tell.
There were no notes or texts telling me what I needed to change.
Or add.
Or cussing me out for using salt.
And how pathetic was I? I’d done nothing but complain about the man all summer, and now he hadn’t talked to me for three days, and I was seriously reconsidering my life decisions.
Even the ones I made post-Derrek.
“Are you sure you don’t mind if I take off?” Vann’s question pulled me out of my spiraling thoughts.
I looked down at the steak I’d been mutilating. Oops.
“No, it’s fine. People will wait. And if they don’t, their loss.”
He lightly punched my shoulder. “That’s the spirit.”
Vann had waited for a lull in the crowd before broaching the subject. We’d been sporadically busy tonight. The bursts were big, but then the lulls were long and slow. It was a weird night.
“So, this is the second date?” I propped my hip against the counter and gave my brother my full attention.
“Second,” he confirmed. “She’s nice. You’d like her.”
“Who cares if I like her? Do you like her?”
He nodded, his eyes remaining bored. “Yeah, she’s nice.”
“You already said that.” My brother. Good grief.
He barely noticed. “Did I?”
“I don’t know why you do this to yourself.”
He jingled the keys in the pocket of his navy blue shorts. This was Vann dressed for a date—J. Crew shorts, crisp white, short-sleeved button up shirt, leather sandals. He looked like a preppy skater. If there was such a thing. “Do what to myself?”
“Date nice girls. You don’t like them.”
He gave me a look. “Of course I like nice girls.”
“No, you don’t.”
He laughed like I was a lunatic. “You think I should date mean girls?”
“I think you should date a girl that makes you feel something other than nice.”
He raised an eyebrow, not taking anything I said seriously. “Now you’re a dating guru?”
“What? You couldn’t tell from my super successful relationship and happily ever after kind of life?”
He stared at me for a minute, watching me, reading me. “I don’t know, sis. I think all your wisdom comes from the bad experience variety.”
I shrugged, my happy mask slipping momentarily.
“Are you ever going to talk about what happened?”
I breathed through my nose so he wouldn’t notice the panic sizzling beneath my skin. He knew the story. At least I’d told him a version of what had happened when I first came home. But that had been the last time I talked about it. It wasn’t worth bringing up again. “There’s nothing to talk about. We didn’t work out. Relationships end all the time.”
“Not usually by one of them running away to Europe for the year. Did he even try to come after you? Or reach out and apologize for everything?”
I shuddered at Vann’s word usage. Derrek had no idea where I’d gone. I’d made sure of that specifically because he would have come after me if he had. But he had bothered my dad for a long time. And if I wouldn’t have deleted my email, social media accounts and canceled my phone, he probably would have found me and hunted me down.
Europe wasn’t far enough away to stop him.
Hell, Jupiter wasn’t far enough away.