Tentatively, she touched his arm again, this time with a gentle stroke. “You have me, if it’s any consolation.”
With his face in profile, the tiny hitch at the corner of his mouth could be amusement or annoyance. “Your breath is a sight better than Jack’s. And based on last night, if I wake up from a nightmare you’re a lot more fun, too.”
“Bennett.” It was the first acknowledgment of her midnight invasion of his room and the embarrassment factor was nuclear.
“Are you blushing?” His voice veered from disbelief to amusement. “You literally jumped me last night, and now you’re red as a radish.”
“‘Jumped’ is a strong word. I advanced with intent.”
“Yeah, your intention was to jump me.”
She slapped his arm and would have again if he hadn’t grabbed her hand.
“See there, you can’t keep your hands off me. I’m irresistible,” he said.
Had this teasing, flirty side of him been lying dormant? Did she inspire it? “You are pretty irresistible.” She popped over the console far enough to kiss his cheek.
A familiar solemnness came over him, but instead of ignoring the moment, he lifted her hand and pressed a kiss on her palm. His lips were soft and warm; his beard, scratchy. Her nerve endings fired, overly sensitized to the difference.
He let go and she pressed her palms together as if she could transfer the feeling. A faint awkwardness descended. The new territory they’d entered together held surprises and pitfalls, and it would take time to explore and map.
The rest of the trip they discussed her business plan in depth. He pointed out some places, like advertising, where she would need to put more money. By the time they arrived at a potential property, she felt as comfortable as she ever would with moving forward.
Risk would always be lurking like a dark cloud, but if she succeeded the reward would be worth it. She glanced over at Bennett. Could the same be said for whatever was brewing between them?
They spent an hour looking over the empty retail space. In a strip mall close to the base, it was easy to get into and out of and saw lots of morning traffic. A storage area in the back could hold a roaster and bagging operations. Even better, there was a bakery across the street and possibilities fired in her brain. The coffee shop could sell bakery items and the bakery could sell Home Front coffee. A win-win.
Once they were back in the cab of the truck, she said, “It’s a great location. I need to run numbers on comparable rents in the area, though.”
“He’s asking too much. We need to talk him down.” He reached across her, opened the glove compartment, and dropped a paper in her lap. “Comparable rents in the area for similar square footage.”
She scanned the numbers. The ire that rose was aimed mostly at herself. She should have run the numbers already. It was basic stuff, and she hadn’t thought of it until now. She rattled the paper close to his face. “Why didn’t you share this with me earlier?”
“Didn’t think about it.”
“I realize this is your money and you’re trying to help, but I need to feel my way through this, Bennett. You have your own business to run.”
“Sorry.” He shot her an inscrutable look as he got them on the road. Of course, all his looks qualified as inscrutable in her mental dictionary. “You would have gone home and then run the numbers and come to the same conclusion. Use this information to negotiate.”
She sank down in her seat, the passing scenery blurred. She had been a stay-at-home wife and mother and then a simple accountant. Was she up to this or was she fooling herself?
They passed the base checkpoints and Harper gave directions to Allison and Darren’s house. “You weren’t down here much?”
“Nope.”
His monosyllabic answer fired her curiosity. What had filled Bennett’s time when their team was stateside? The questions would have to wait. He parked the truck at the curb in front of Darren and Allison’s house.
“Not bad for base housing.” He slid out.
She hummed, but a shiver passed through her. Allison gave an energy to wherever she lived. One of the shutters at the front window was hanging askew and the bushes hadn’t been trimmed since their fall growth, giving the house an unkempt, harried feel.
Allison greeted them at the door, offering Harper a hug and Bennett a welcoming smile. At first glance, she looked better. Less tired and not as stressed out. Although she’d also had time to prepare for their arrival, which along with a spread of appetizers and drinks included spackling the cracks in her life.
Their small talk echoed in the entry hall. The stairs creaked.
“Here’s Darren.” Allison’s demeanor changed subtly. Her smile grew brittle and a new tension enveloped her. Darren reached them and immediately offered Bennett a half handshake, half hug.
“It’s good to see you, Grizzly.”
“You too, Family Man.”
Bennett tapped his fist on Darren’s back and exchanged a glance with Harper over Darren’s shoulder. In it she could see the same worries that plagued her.
“Kids are out back playing. If you boys want to supervise, I’ll bring you each a beer.”
“That’d be great, Allison,” Bennett said.
“Thanks, babe.” Darren led the way through the kitchen and out the back door. His bedhead, bare feet, and sweatpants gave the impression of a man beyond caring.
Allison uncapped two beers and pointed to a platter full of mini-quiches. “You’ve got to try those. They are to die for.”
Harper’s stomach, already a mass of her own nerves, now clenched with worry over Allison and Darren. When Allison returned, Harper let her prattle on about the food and pour them both glasses of wine before she cut her off. “Enough. What is going on with Darren?”
Allison’s laugh was tinged with tears. “Leave it to you to cut through my BS.”
“That’s what friends do, dummy. Is he going to the therapy group?” Harper took a seat at the table and Allison joined her, slumping back and drinking half her glass of wine in one go.
She wiped her mouth with the back of her hand. “He went once. Said he wasn’t going back. His nightmares were worse than they had been in months that night, so I didn’t insist. I thought maybe being around other guys like him had made it sharper somehow.”
“Or maybe hearing the other guys made him face up to his own demons.”
“Maybe.” Allison drank the rest of her wine and poured more.
Wisdom didn’t present itself to Harper in a lightning strike. “Have you seen anyone?”
“I tried, but Darren got mad. Said he didn’t want me talking about him to a stranger. Or worse, some base shrink that might spread rumors.” She drank more wine and turned her head to the side. “He would kill me if he knew I’d talked to my wives group about him.”
“Sounds a little paranoid.” The acidic wine did nothing to settle her stomach. “What does he think about me?”
“He thinks me talking to you is okay. I guess because of what you went through with Noah. I’m hoping Bennett might be able to help him.”
Harper sat back and took another sip even though she didn’t want more. She wasn’t holding out hope that Bennett would be able to make a breakthrough with Darren. Problem was men like Bennett and Darren were trained to not exhibit weakness. They talked sports and reminisced about derring-do in the field, not how they struggled with nightmares and sleepwalking and depression.
Harper had seen the changes SEAL training had wrought in Noah over time. He’d been a good man from start to finish, but as the deployments racked up so did the walls between them. Some of the distance might have been the time spent apart or simply growing up or his desire to protect her.
She’d never probed too deeply about his deployments. He’d certainly faced similar trials to Bennett and Darren, and just as surely those experiences had changed him subtly but inexorably. Had she been na?ve or had she not really wanted to know? How much about Noah had she not understood or even tried to understand? Hindsight was an evil bitch.