She pulled back and for a minute he thought he’d lost her. She stared at him, her dark eyes full of something unreadable. He’d always been able to read her … but she’d changed. Something fundamental inside her had changed. For better? For worse? He didn’t know.
“Sean, we can’t make promises we can’t keep. Neither of us. If you put that weight on your shoulders, you will suffer for it. I will disappoint you. You will disappoint me. We will both say and do things in anger or sadness or pain that will hurt. But I know that you love me. That you take me for who I am. That you aren’t going to try and change me or fix me, but you’ll always pick me up and make me stronger. You will carry me when I can’t walk. And I’m just as much to blame for you lying to me about Jesse.”
“No, Lucy, that’s all on me.”
She smiled, just a bit. “Okay, most of it. But part of it is my responsibility. For the last two years, I have leaned on you for everything. I have depended on you for my sanity when things overwhelmed me. You have always been here for me. Always.”
“I wasn’t—not this week. When you needed me the most.”
“And that’s it—because you weren’t here, you thought you were protecting me by keeping this information to yourself, but I learned that even though this case was the hardest case I hope I ever have, and even though I wanted you here to lean on, I made it through. There were a few moments I didn’t think I could … but I did. That’s because of you. I am stronger because of you, but you don’t have to coddle me and nurse me back to emotional health every night. You enabled me to stand on my own feet, to take the good with the bad. To survive.”
He touched her cheek. This woman was incredible in every way. “You have always been a survivor.”
“Physically, yes. But emotionally, everything is locked up tight. And it needs to be, most of the time, so I can do my job. But I survived this week emotionally because of you.”
“I will try never to disappoint you.”
She smiled. There was a glimmer of light in her eyes. Just a small beacon of hope, but suddenly the weight of Lucy leaving disappeared. She wasn’t leaving him. She was here.
She’d stayed.
“That’s better,” she said. “We’re going to need to talk.”
“Isn’t that what we’ve been doing?”
She climbed off his lap and pulled him out of the chair. She wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him. “We’re going to talk about how you gain parental rights.”
His heart skipped a beat. “Lucy—you don’t have to do this. You don’t have to be part of this if you don’t want to. I—”
She put her finger to his lips. “Of course I want to be part of this because it is your life. The good and the bad. We’re getting married in six weeks. For better or worse.” She kissed him. “Jesse is your son. He deserves to know you, to know Kane, to know the Rogans. More important, you deserve to be part of his life. We’re going to find a way to ensure you can see him.”
Sean pulled Lucy to him so tight he was afraid he’d break her. Except she wasn’t breakable. Not anymore. “I love you, Lucy.”
She took his hand and pulled him away from her office. Then she stopped and smiled. “I don’t have to be at headquarters until noon tomorrow.”
“Eat. Sleep.”
She lay back on the bed, pulling him down to her. “Make love. Then maybe food and sleep. And then repeat.”
She put her hands on his face and held him above her. He saw the truth in her eyes. She had changed. Something fundamental, deep inside. But she was here, she hadn’t left him even though he had screwed up. She hadn’t left him, and he would never give her another reason to even consider it.
“That sounds like the perfect plan.” His voice was rough around the edges.
“I’ve missed you, Sean. In every way.”
Sean kissed Lucy as if it were the last time.
Read on for an excerpt from
MAKE THEM PAY
by Allison Brennan
Available in March 2017 from St. Martin’s Paperbacks
CHAPTER ONE
Kane Rogan had been a Marine and a mercenary, and had devoted his life to Rogan-Caruso-Kincaid Protective Services. He was ruthless when necessary, but preferred clandestine operations to violent encounters. He wasn’t a soft man, but he wasn’t cruel.
Still, he had a deep-seated anger for those who hurt innocent people. And a violent rage against those who bought and sold human beings like property.
If Kane had known that the FBI had that bastard Angelo Zapelli in custody, then let him go, Kane would have taken him out before he crossed the border. He didn’t care about any rights Zapelli claimed to have, or a supposed illegal search and seizure—which resulted in saving dozens of lives. He didn’t care that Zapelli was a Mexican citizen or that he had been detained without probable cause or any of that other legal bullshit which separated Kane from some of his closest friends.