The List

Everything about this new stage of my life seemed simple and perfect. Since Riley, I hadn’t cared about things in the way that I used to. For the first time, I realized how little I truly needed. Like that list. I hadn’t been planning on continuing to use it myself, but I’d figured letting it exist wouldn’t be doing too much damage.

But I was wrong about that. And, once again, Riley was right. It was good we had destroyed the list. Not just for us, but for everyone involved.

We sat down and ate our meal together. It was actually fun, as we talked about topics normal couples probably did. We talked about her school. My work. Both of our hopes and dreams.

And when I made love to her later, it was with a sweet freedom I’d never experienced before. It was funny how I’d never realized how trapped I’d felt in the life I’d built around me.





CHAPTER THIRTY SEVEN


Riley


Ann-Marie slurped away at her iced latte, her lips puckered tight around the straw and her eyes wide. She looked like she was listening to the most amazing story that was ever told in the history of mankind.

“You can’t tell anyone,” I said. “Not a single person. Don’t even write about this in your diary. The list needs to be gone and forgotten.”

She nodded eagerly. “Don’t worry. Your secret is safe with me. It’s really cool that he did that for you.”

“I know,” I murmured.

“I think this guy is legit. He actually loves you.”

Pleasure swooped through me, and I buried my face in my hands to hide my blush. “I really love him. It’s almost stupid how much I do, especially so soon.”

“At least you two are admitting it now.”

“Yeah, with no help from you.”

Ann-Marie’s jaw dropped. “Hey! I was trying to protect your ass. And apparently, my efforts were in vain. You went on that yacht even though I told you it was a bad idea.”

“I know. And I’m kidding. Don’t be mad.” I reached across the table and squeezed her hand. “You’re the best friend ever. And it was a stupid idea. I promise to listen in the future.”

She squeezed me back. “Maybe you and Xavier can name your first kid after me. Hey, I gotta run. See you tonight?”

“I don’t know.”

“That’s right.” She rolled her eyes. “You’re in love now. All right. Well, just remember you can come home when you and Xavier have your first real fight.”

I laughed. “That’s already happened.”

“Second fight then. I’ll see you for an HBO and pizza night when you and Xavier have your second fight.” She grabbed her bag and stood up. “With ice cream.”

I gave her a little salute. “I’ll be home soon. I promise.”

“Good. I would get too lonely if you moved in with your new boyfriend.” She blew me a kiss and left the coffee shop. I finished up the rest of my coffee and headed out onto the street. In my purse’s side pocket, my phone buzzed.

I looked at the screen to discover a text from Xavier: I miss you.

I laughed and typed back a response. I’m coming back your way now.

The trek back to Xavier’s building felt more like I was gliding on water rather than walking on pavement. I had spring fever when the summer was almost over. I had that insta-love sensation you get when your crush kisses you for the first time. I was on top of the world, and nothing could bring me down.

Except for the person I ran into in front of Xavier’s building. As if Seth felt my eyes on his profile, he stopped walking and turned to look at me.

“What are you doing here?” I asked, stopping out of arm’s reach of him. I folded my arms across my chest, instantly going into defensive mode.

“I should ask you the same thing. Going upstairs for a little hookup, are you?”

The words cut deeper than they should have. Seth didn’t really know me, but that didn’t stop his callous remark from hitting home. “Is Xavier expecting you?” I volleyed back.

“Yeah, as a matter of fact, he is.”

I could tell by the way his eye twitched that he was lying. Also, no way would Xavier have Seth and I come over at the same time. Not after what happened on Seth’s yacht.

“Go home, Seth. Go rest your head. I heard you hit it pretty hard.”

He puffed up, his chest seeming to fill with air. “You’re playing with fire, girl. Do you get that I can destroy you? With one tweet, I can have everyone in this city knowing what a whore you are. Xavier won’t keep a girl with a slut reputation around. Sorry. That’s just the way it is in our world.”

Anger like I’d never felt coursed through me. Before I knew it, I was stepping forward and ended up a breath away from Seth. He was only a few inches taller than me, so all I had to do to look into his eyes was lift my chin. “Don’t come here ever again. Don’t bother Xavier and don’t talk to me. If you do, I’m reporting you for sexual harassment.”

His upper lip curled. “I didn’t do anything to you. I just touched your arm.”

“That’s not how I remember it.”

A long moment passed as we stared each other down. Seth took a step back and shook his head. “You’re a crazy bitch.”

“I’m glad you think so. Maybe that means you’ll take my threat to heart.”

With that, I marched into the building. The doorman from yesterday was back. He tipped his hat and winked at me, and I gave him a big smile.

Three seconds after I closed Xavier’s penthouse door behind me, he appeared. “Where were you?”

“Just out. I saw Ann-Marie. Oh, and Seth.”

“Seth?”

I pressed my palm against his chest in an attempt to calm him down. “It’s okay. I just ran into him in front of your building. He was coming up here to talk to you. I basically told him to leave us alone or else I would file a sexual assault report against him.”

“You should do that anyway,” Xavier said as he pulled me into a tight hug.

“I think he took what I said to heart. He’s going to leave us alone… hopefully.”

Xavier wound his fingers in mine. “So, you really told Seth to fuck off?”

I snorted. “I didn’t use that exact word… but I did get up in his face. I don’t know what came over me. I just couldn’t stand the sound of his voice, or what he was saying about you and me, and the next thing I knew, I was inches away from him.”

Xavier laughed. “I might need to teach you how to fight. Now that your attitude is coming out, you’ll have to learn how to defend yourself.”

“Nu-uh. No thanks. No fighting for me. I just want to bake cupcakes and lay around naked with you. That’s about where my life goals end.”

Xavier cocked his head. “Oh, really?”

“Yes, really,” I answered, lowering my voice. I leaned in closer and lifted my face. His hand pressed into the small of my back, the place where it fit perfectly, and his breath washed across my nose and mouth.

“You’re in luck,” he whispered. He dipped his face and trailed his nose along my cheek and ear. His teeth snatched my earlobe and tugged slightly. A delicious shiver ran through me. Fire ignited in my core, sending my body temperature soaring.

“Oh, yeah?” I managed to ask, my words sounding more like a moan than discernible English.

“Yeah,” he whispered into my ear. “Because I happen to have some cake mix in the kitchen right now.”