As she finished laughing, still bent over the flower, she looked up. Lord Harrison was staring at her. His jaw was slack and his eyes were a little wide. He was staring at her as if he had never seen her before.
It made a shiver shoot up Regina’s spine, but not in an unpleasant way. She straightened up. “What?” She asked. “What is it?”
“You looked like a picture just then,” Cora noted. “I should have liked to paint you if I had any talent at it.”
“Does anybody have any real talent at it besides artists?” Regina asked. “I know that we are all supposed to learn drawing and such but I do not know a single lady who is actually accomplished at it who was not also pursuing it as a profession.”
Harrison shook himself, as if he had been in a daze. “Yes, well. Perhaps it is time that we retire? I think that some tea will be in order and then we shall get started on the cards again.”
“Cards again, Harrison, you will run the poor girl ragged,” Cora protested. “Is there not some other way that you two could occupy your time together?”
“Miss Regina asked me to teach her,” Harrison replied. Was it just Regina’s imagination or was his tone a little rougher than usual?
“Very well then,” Cora said, giving in. “Lay on, MacDuff.”
They walked back through the park. Harrison commented that he should like to make this a daily thing. They could go to the colleges and the art museums, and other places besides the park. But an outing, yes, an outing a day would be good for Regina, it was agreed.
Regina tried to figure out what had changed about him. It wasn’t something that she could easily put a name to. It was simply as if, for a moment, a veil had been lifted. The veil was back in place now but the fact that she had seen it at all and now knew that it was there made her see him differently.
She shook herself. She was being ridiculous. What kind of flights of fancy was she giving herself over to? Time to focus back on the cards.
If only she could erase that one expression from her mind: the moment when she had bent over the flower and had been laughing. The look on Harrison’s face in that moment…
She could not forget it. No matter how hard she tried.
Chapter 21
Thomas braced himself against his dresser and tried very hard to remember the reasons that he was a good person.
He had never murdered anyone, that was a start. Otherwise he was having a hard time coming up with reasons.
He could not be falling for Regina. He could not.
For one thing, how could he possibly be falling for someone who was eight years younger than he was? Eight!
Yes, of course, he knew men all the time that had fallen for much younger women and married them. He knew of a gentleman of ten thousand a year who had recently married a woman seven years his junior. It was not at all uncommon.
But Thomas had never been fully comfortable with the idea, personally. It was part of why he had liked Bridget so much. Like. Likes her, present tense!
He liked that Bridget was much closer to his age. He had been surprised that nobody had managed to capture her attention yet. He was sure that there were plenty of eligible men who would make good partners that had shown an interest in her.
Still, one man’s loss was another man’s gain, and he had been eager to make himself known to her.
Regina, though… he was finding that he liked her more than he had ever liked any woman before. It concerned him, how much he enjoyed her company. He was happy when she was happy. Her unhappiness magnified his. It gnawed at him like an empty stomach when he hadn’t eaten all day.
It was why he took her on long walks through the park and to the theatre. He knew that he didn’t have to. It wasn’t at all a part of their bargain.
He did it because he wanted to introduce her to the world. He wanted her to smile and to indulge in arts and culture and life. It was clear to him that despite the best intentions—for he knew that someone such as Bridget Hartfield could only have had the best of intentions—Regina had gotten the short end of the stick.
Someone like Regina needed to be introduced to people slowly and in intimate settings. The way to make her enjoy society was to take her to outings that piqued her interest such as the College of the Masters where people studied drawing.
Taking her to balls where she became easily overwhelmed did her more harm than good. It made her panic. She was either too overwhelmed to speak or blurted out the wrong thing.
Then to compound that, the natural gossip mill did its work. People spoke about her. They talked of how quiet she was or how awkward she was. And so Regina grew more afraid and more quiet in response.
It was a vicious cycle.
Thomas, however, had seen Regina blossom. She grew happier and more confident each day. He took her to Miss Eliza’s house, or Lord Quentin’s, and watched her converse easily.
She had firm opinions about the theatre and the plays they saw there. She was beginning to enjoy opera although that had taken some work. And she loved learning about art.
He was even getting her to enjoy their walks in the park. Regina had been right in protesting that she was not an outdoors sort of person. But the parks, Thomas had reasoned, were more contained and better kept than wild fields in the countryside.
He loved watching how she grew happier and more confident. It made him happy to see her.
But the more happy it made him, the more aware he became of their connection. He was more intimate with her than he should be. She relied on him too much.
It scared him, honestly. He had not truly given his heart to anyone since he had lost his parents—first his mother and then his father. He hadn’t had time for one thing.
Now that his fortune was back and he could move about society freely, he knew that it was expected that he take a wife. And he had been planning to take one.
He had thought that he had found the perfect companion in Bridget. He had thought that he loved her. And now he was starting to realize that he’d had no idea what love was.
How could he have confused simple attraction and regard for love? How could he have thought that his enjoyment of Bridget’s company and his respect for her accomplishments were anything close to the intense pleasure that he felt when around Regina?
Regina, of course, must never find out. It would put her in a most cruel position. He wouldn’t be accepting Bridget as payment of course. Now that he knew he did not love her then he could not propose to her. He would force neither of them into a loveless marriage.
But if Regina found out… she would feel beholden to him. He knew that she admired him and looked up to him. He knew that he must be as a brother or father to her. Regina’s father hadn’t, as far as he knew, been all that hands on with her.
It was a pity. The poor man was clearly entrapped by his addiction. Hopefully all of this would help to cure him of it. But it would take time and diligence.