I was a horrible person. I knew what I said would hurt him. The look of sadness in his eyes stabbed me straight through the heart. A wound that was so deep, I hated myself. I lay in bed, exhausted from all the tears that fell last night. Had I not said what I did, I would be wrapped up in the comfort and safety of Drew’s arms. Instead, I was alone. Which was what I wanted, right? Fuck if I knew what I wanted anymore. This wasn’t how things were supposed to happen. I was in no position to fall for a man and Kristen wasn’t supposed to be dying. My life had changed in the blink of an eye, and now, I found it was too much to handle.
Climbing out of bed, I showered, got myself dressed, and looked at my phone, debating whether or not to call my father. I couldn’t stop thinking about what Drew said about everyone deserving a second chance. Was I really that much of a cold-hearted bitch that I couldn’t at least let my father apologize to me? My mind went back to the conversation I had with Ano, the one where he told me that I needed to be fearless to continue my journey. Was I scared to let my father apologize to me? The deeper I searched into my soul for answers, the more confused I became. Dialing his number, I took in a deep long breath.
“Hello,” he answered.
“Dad, it’s Jillian. I was told you wanted to talk.”
“Jillian, thank you for calling. I had hoped you would.”
“If you want to talk, meet me at The Lake in Central Park at three o’clock.”
“I’ll be there. Thank you, Jillian.”
“See you soon.” I hung up before he had a chance to say anything else.
I had two hours before I had to meet my father in Central Park, so I headed to Kristen’s and Noah’s apartment. I needed to talk to her and warn her of our father’s intentions.
“Hey, you.” Kristen smiled as I walked through the door.
“Hey.” I kissed her cheek. “Are you and Noah busy?”
“We’re just going over some wedding stuff. Are you okay?”
“I need to talk to you about something,” I spoke as I set my purse down and took a seat on the couch.
“It sounds serious,” Noah spoke as he walked into the room.
“I guess you can say it is. There’s something I haven’t told you yet,” I spoke as I looked at Kristen. “Friday night, at the charity event, I ran into my parents.”
“Shit. What were they doing there?” Kristen asked.
“Apparently, they were invited. Who knows? The whole night was a clusterfuck with them. Anyway, things were said and there were a lot of raised voices. I told our father about our relationship and I also told him about your illness. He wants to meet you.”
“Fuck him!” Noah shouted.
Kristen put her hand up to him. “Noah, please.”
“You seriously aren’t considering it, are you?” he asked her.
“What harm would it do? I think I should at least meet my father before I die.”
I sat there and stared at the brave and beautiful woman who was my sister. She was filled with courage and strength and I admired her greatly for it.
“Are you sure, Kristen? How can you forgive him for what he did?”
A small smile crossed her lips as she reached over and took hold of my hand.
“Forgiveness is what gives us strength in life, Jill. Forgiveness sets you free.”
“I’m meeting him in Central Park. Supposedly, he wants to apologize to me.”
“What about Patricia?” she asked.
“I’m not so sure things are good between them. Not that they ever were, but he made a comment to Drew that she will no longer stand in the way of him and his daughters.”
“Speaking of Drew, how were his parents?”
“You’re never going to believe this.”
“Now what?” She cocked her head.
“You know your nurse, Andrea?”
“Yeah.” She frowned.
“She’s his mother.”
“No way! So the son she was talking about all that time was Drew?”
“Yes.”
“And you connected with her right away and even had coffee and a bagel with her?”
“Yep. I sure did.”
“Not knowing that was his mother?”
“Nope. I had no clue.” I shook my head.
She let out a long sigh. “The universe is smacking you right upside the head, Jill.”
“Yeah. Well, I said something last night that hurt Drew and I’m not sure he’ll be coming around anymore.”
“Oh for fuck sakes. What did you do?”
“He just can’t understand that I can’t be with anyone right now.”
“Oh, Jill. Drew is the best thing that has ever happened to you.”
“I really don’t want to talk about it right now. Please understand.”
“Okay. But we’re going to talk about it soon. Oh, by the way, after the wedding, Noah and I are going on a honeymoon.” She beamed with excitement.
“Where to?” I asked.
“Italy. I know it’s last minute, but he wasn’t sure if he could get the time off work. But his boss gave him two weeks.”
“Wow. That’s great. I’m so happy for you. But are you well enough to travel?”
“I’ll never be well enough again, sis. But I’ll be okay. Italy is a place I’ve always wanted to see and my future husband is going to make sure I get to.” She smiled.
I looked at my watch. It was time to leave to go meet my father.
“Just promise me you’ll take it easy while you’re there.” I got up from the couch and gave her a hug.
“You worry too much.” She laughed.
Chapter Thirty-Five
Jillian