the windows in the sitting room and the one in the
study but I can’t remember closing this one. ‘At least, I thought I had.’
‘Maybe you didn’t close it properly and it came open,’
he says. ‘Maybe that was the noise you heard.’
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‘You’re probably right,’ I say, relieved. ‘Come on, let’s have that drink.’
*
Later, after dinner, we carry the rest of the bottle of wine through to the sitting room to finish in front of a film.
It’s hard to find one we haven’t already seen.
‘What about Juno?’ he asks as we flick through the list. ‘Do you know what it’s about?’
‘A teenager who finds herself pregnant and looks for
the perfect couple to adopt her baby. I don’t really think it’s for you.’
‘Oh, I don’t know.’ He takes the remote from me and
puts it to one side. ‘We haven’t talked about having a
baby for a while now,’ he says, gathering me in his arms.
‘You do still want to, don’t you?’
I lay my head on his shoulder, loving how safe he
makes me feel. ‘Yes, of course.’
‘Then perhaps we should start putting the wheels in
motion. It can be quite a long process, apparently.’
‘We said when we’d been married a year,’ I say and,
despite my joy, I realise that I’m stalling, because how
can I think about having a child when, before it’s even
a teenager, I could be diagnosed with dementia, like
Mum? I know I’m probably worrying about nothing
but to ignore the problems I’ve been having with my
memory would be stupid.
The Breakdown
75
‘It’s lucky it’s our anniversary soon, then,’ he says
softly. ‘Why don’t we watch an action film instead?’
I jump on the distraction and turn to face the film
choices on the television menu. ‘All right. Let’s have a
look at what there is.’
We watch a film until the news comes on. As always,
Jane’s murder features prominently and I only carry on
watching because I’m desperate to know if they’re any
nearer to catching her killer. But they’ve made little
progress and a police officer comes on.
‘If you, or anyone you know, were in the vicinity of Blackwater Lane last Friday night, or in the early hours of Saturday morning, and saw Jane Walter’s car, a dark red Renault Clio, parked or otherwise, please call the following number.’
He seems to be looking directly at me as he speaks,
and when he adds that people can call the number
anonymously, I realise it’s the answer to my dilemma.
The news finishes and Matthew, ready for bed, tries
to pull me to my feet.
‘You go ahead, there’s something I want to watch on
another channel,’ I say, reaching for the remote.
‘OK,’ he says cheerfully. ‘I’ll see you later.’
I wait until he’s upstairs, then rewind the news until
I find the number and jot it down on a piece of paper.
I don’t want the police to be able to trace the call back to me so I’ll have to use a payphone, which means I won’t be able to phone until Monday, when Matthew’s back at work. And once I have, hopefully some of my
guilt will disappear.
SUNDAY JULY 26th
The house phone rings while Matthew is in the kitchen
making breakfast to bring back to bed.
‘Can you get it?’ I call from the bedroom, shifting
further down under the covers. ‘If it’s for me, tell
whoever it is that I’ll call them back!’
A moment later, I hear him asking Andy how he is,
so I guess bumping into Hannah has prompted his call.
Remembering how I had suddenly run off to meet
Rachel, I can’t help feeling a little guilty.
‘Let me guess – Andy wants you to play tennis this
morning,’ I say when Matthew comes back upstairs.
‘No, he wanted to know what time we’re expecting
them.’ He looks quizzically at me. ‘I didn’t realise you’d invited them today.’
‘What do you mean?’
‘Just that you didn’t mention it was today they were
coming for a barbecue.’
Title: The Breakdown ARC, Format: 126x198, v1, Output date:08/11/16
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‘It isn’t.’ Sitting up, I take one of the pillows from his side of the bed and put it behind my back. ‘I said they must come round but I didn’t say when.’
‘Well, Andy seems to think it’s today.’
I smile. ‘He’s having a joke with you.’
‘No, he was deadly serious.’ He pauses. ‘Are you sure
you didn’t invite them today?’
‘Of course I am!’
‘It’s just that you did the garden yesterday.’
‘What’s that got to do with it?’
‘Just that Andy asked me if you’d managed to get the
place tidied up. Apparently, you told Hannah that if they came for a barbecue, it would be a good excuse to get the garden into shape.’
‘Then why didn’t they know the time? If I’d arranged
something with Hannah I would have said the time.
She’s got it wrong, not me.’
Matthew gently shakes his head. The movement is so