Sunday Morning (Damaged #7.5)

 

Though I didn’t understand why he struggled with the decision, I knew why I hesitated. Kirk Johansson was a man in every sense of the word. I’d played adult for a long, damn time, but this was the first time I really had to walk the walk. Kirk might break my heart, destroy everything about me, and then walk away like none of it mattered. Was I strong enough to face that possibility?

 

Like Kirk, I struggled with whether one ride might lead to an ending I couldn’t handle. Like him, I gave into the curiosity I felt for our uneasy dance. Climbing behind him, I settled onto the Harley like a pro. Wrapping my arms around Kirk proved more difficult. I’d never touched a man I wanted before. Kirk was a dream come to life, and I feared waking up.

 

 

 

 

 

5 - Kirk

 

 

Jodi never felt like a kid holding onto me while we rode around Chesterfield. I told myself she wasn’t old enough to know what she did to me. When I was her age, everything was a fucking game. I wanted what I wanted at that fucking moment, and I didn’t give a shit about anyone or anything beyond my needs.

 

I finally pulled my Harley into a spot next to a park just outside of Chesterfield. The place was quiet except for a few people walking their dogs. Jodi slid off the bike and steadied herself. Her cheeks were bright pink from the heat, and I noticed the way her shirt glued itself to her sweaty skin.

 

After I climbed off my hog, Jodi studied it. Her gaze admired the curves of the bike while I admired hers.

 

“A guy at school talks about how his car purrs. I don’t get why he thinks that’s cool. Your bike roars angry and powerful. All the metal and leather demands to be acknowledged. I used to hate the sound of the Harleys in the trailer park. Now I smile,” she said and then added, “Because the Harleys make me think of you.”

 

“What is it that you think I am?”

 

Jodi heard the challenge in my voice. Her gaze narrowed, and I prepared for her temper.

 

“I’m not blind. I know you’re the bad guy. I know what bad guys do. Knowing and feeling are different. I’d think you know that with you being so old and wise.”

 

Exhaling hard, I light a cigarette. “Girls like you romanticize men like me.”

 

“Let’s be square here, Kirk. I’m not the girl from the right side of the tracks looking to slum it with a bad boy. I don’t have a big future waiting for me that I’m ditching for the dream of getting into your jeans. Stop playing the victim.”

 

I struggled not to smile at her comment. Keeping my stern expression, I needed to make her understand.

 

“I’m trying to be a nice guy and keep you from making a mistake.”

 

“What mistake? Smiling when I think about you? Or maybe you want to stay out of my fantasies while I touch myself at night. You play the nice guy, but I’m not a fairytale damsel, and you’re certainly no knight.”

 

“I saved you from that fucker ready to tear you apart.”

 

“I got to take out my frustrations on his face. He wouldn’t be the first man to hit me, and I doubt he’ll be the last. It’s not about whether I get hit in life, but whether I hit back.”

 

The thought of anyone harming Jodi lit a raging fire in my belly. “No one should be laying a hand on you.”

 

Jodi shrugged at my statement and glanced at the dog walkers nearby. “Do you have any kids?”

 

“Not that I know of anyway. Women are sneaky, though.”

 

“Is that why you’re protective of me? You never had any kids, and I’m bringing out your fatherly instincts.”

 

“You’re fucking with me, right?”

 

Jodi’s expression remained unreadable, but I sensed she was bluffing. “You’re the one playing protective dad.”

 

“Where is your dad?”

 

“In prison.”

 

“Sounds about right. Is he in there because of you?”

 

Jodi’s mask cracked. “No.”

 

“Have you ever met him?”

 

“Yeah. Well, there are two guys who might be my dad. They’re brothers and both are in prison. I don’t visit the rapist anymore because he got horny when I visited the first time. Now I just visit the murderer. You know, to gloat.”

 

I smiled at her expression. “Gloat about what?”

 

“I’m free, and he’s locked away. He won’t be getting out anytime soon either.”

 

“Why do you hate him?”

 

“He’s a predator.”

 

“So am I.”

 

“Do you rape women? Are you a serial killer? Technically, my dad could be either of those fuckers. I come from criminal trash, but I’m sure you already guessed that.”

 

“I wouldn’t have actually. When I think of you in that trailer park, I see a rose surrounded by weeds and thorns.”

 

Jodi blinked as if startled and then she shrugged. “That’s poetic.”

 

“I’m not those things, but I’m a killer. I’m also hunting you despite my best efforts to let you go.”

 

“Why me?”

 

“Why not?”