Stranger Than Fanfiction

“And I’m guessing you’re still a virgin, too?”


Joey couldn’t bring himself to say it, so he just nodded. Brian glanced around the bar, as if trying to find Joey’s chaperone. Someone needed to talk to this kid.

“You know what, let’s have a chat,” Brian said, and took a seat. “You probably don’t want to get a lecture from the guy you were hoping to sleep with, but I wish I had someone to talk to me about this when I was your age. Tell me, why would you want to lose your virginity to a total stranger? Wouldn’t you rather wait for someone special?”

“I’d rather just get it out of the way so I don’t have to think about it anymore,” Joey said.

“That’s your hormones talking,” Brian said. “Those little bastards will do anything to get you to spread your seed—that’s a biological fact—but you can’t let them overpower your common sense. It’s practically impossible not to when you’re young, horny, and live in an oversexualized society. Hell, even Instagram turns into a digital red light district after a certain hour—how can you not be tempted?”

“Dude, we just met on a hookup app,” Joey reminded him. “Are you seriously giving me an abstinence talk right now?”

“Not the point I’m trying to make,” Brian said. “Look, sex is the fucking best, but it can also be the fucking worst if you’re not careful. Your first time could potentially set the tone of your sex life. If you don’t start off with a decent experience or don’t go into it respecting yourself, it could lead to some really bad habits. You don’t want to become one of those guys with fulfillment issues who jumps into bed with every guy they meet—believe me.”

Brian downed his Manhattan in one gulp like he was washing away a bad memory.

“We’re not hooking up tonight, are we?” Joey asked.

“Absolutely not,” Brian said. “You’re going to be talking about your first for the rest of your life. The last thing you want to do is look back with regrets or feel like someone unworthy is walking around with a piece of your soul. Trust me, I learned that the hard way. If I could do it all over again, I would lose it to a friend I knew I could trust, someone I could be safe with and laugh about it with later.”

“I think I appreciate what you’re saying,” Joey said. “But it’s more complicated than that. My dad’s a well-known pastor and I’m going to a Baptist college next year. It’s hard to think of a scenario that wouldn’t get back to him aside from doing it with a stranger—and I’m not ready for my family to know.”

“Now, that’s rough,” Brian said. “I’ve got an uncle that’s refused to acknowledge me since I came out, but it’s not an excuse to shortcut the most important parts of our lives. I know this is hard to understand when you’re young, but if your dad would rather lose a son than accept you for who you are, that’s his loss. Remember, for every person that doesn’t accept you, you’ll find a dozen who will. It’s a gay law.”

“Are you like a motivational speaker or something? You can’t be making all this stuff up on the spot.”

“Tuesdays and Thursdays at the San Diego LGBT Community Center,” he said.

Joey couldn’t believe his luck. Of all the people to meet online, he had found a person who wouldn’t take advantage of him. Brian put some cash on the counter and stood to leave.

“Drinks are on me,” he said. “Take care of yourself, Jay.”

“Actually, it’s Joey,” he said. “And are you sure you don’t want to take me back to your place? You’d make an awfully decent memory.”

Brian laughed. When no one was looking, he quickly leaned down and kissed Joey on the lips.

“There,” he said. “At least you got something out of the way. Good night.”

Joey watched Brian go in total silence as he came down from the high of his first kiss. Sure, he didn’t get what he wanted, but at least he’d leave the bar a little more of a sinner than a saint.

“Hey, Romeo! How was your date?”

Joey turned toward the voice and saw Cash Carter sitting in a booth in the very back. The actor had a huge grin and gave him a thumbs-up.

“Oh no.” Joey gasped. “How long have you been sitting there?”

“The whole time,” Cash said.

Joey had never been more mortified in his life. All the blood in his body rushed to the pit of his stomach. He covered his face with his hands, but nothing could shield him from the intense overexposure. The night he had been dreaming about since yesterday morning had quickly turned into a nightmare.

“He seemed like a nice guy. Too bad he wouldn’t put out.”

Joey hurried to his table and slid into the seat across from him.

“Please don’t tell the others about this,” he begged. “I know I lied to you in the car, and I’m sure there might be some satisfaction in calling me out on it, but I’m not ready for anyone to know.”

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