“Shh,” he said, pressing a finger to my lips. “Not now, Abby. Nothing else matters right now. You're alive, and that's all I care about. That's all that matters.”
Tears welled in his eyes and they glistened in the light. Crying was about the last thing I ever expected to see form him, but there it was. I reached up and wiped away a fat tear that rolled down his cheek, my heart breaking as I watched them fall. Seeing tears on such a big, rough, gruff, and rugged man was somehow so much more real and so much more emotional to me – and because it was who it was, a man I cared about intensely – it went double.
“Oh baby,” I said. “Don't cry – I'm fine. Promise.”
“It's not that, Abby,” he said, his voice soft. “It's just for so long, I didn't let anyone get close to me because I didn't want to lose them. I've lost too many people in my life. My best friend to an IED attack overseas. Cody to suicide when his PTSD became too much for him to bear. My parents. Everyone. I didn't want to care about you because I knew how much it hurt to lose someone you care about – and yet I almost lost you today. But, it made me realize something.”
“What's that, Chase?” I asked, my voice barely more than a whisper.
“It's too late,” he said, his eyes fixed on mine. “I already care about you, and I can't lose you. No matter what.”
My heart raced as I looked him in the eye, heard the sincerity in his words – and saw the genuine emotion on his face. I cupped his face in my hands, stroking his beard with my fingers.
“You're not going to lose me, Chase,” I whispered.
“Promise?”
“Yes, I promise you,” I chuckled. “You've been stuck with me ever since the day you saved me from the cows. You just didn't know it then.”
He laughed, raising my hand to his lips. The tears were drying up and he looked happier. More settled. Yet, there was still the elephant in the room.
If I turned out to be pregnant – what then? We were still so new at this, new at being together, that there were unanswered – and unasked – questions aplenty.
The biggest one, though, was whether Chase would be okay with a baby. Would I have to choose? Because God knew, I'd choose my baby – I'd have to. There was no doubt about it. No question about it. Not that I ever wanted to break my promise to Chase. But, I was going to have the baby no matter what. Of course, I wanted Chase to be a part of our child's life, but I wasn't going to force him to do anything he didn't want to do.
There was another knock at the door. This time it was the doctor.
“Abby, good news,” Dr. Rivera said, smiling brightly, her voice cheery and comforting, rolling over my skin like velvet. “Everything has come back normal. You're healthy and, while you're still only a few weeks along, the baby looks fine too.”
“The baby,” I whispered.
My head fell back against the pillows and I stared at the ceiling. I couldn't look at Chase. I was too afraid to see the look on his face. My hand rested on top of my belly, and I thought about the life growing inside of me. I'd lost one child already thanks to Paul's abuse. Nothing in this world would make me lose another. Not if I could help it.
Chase's hand joined mine, resting atop my belly, and I looked over at him. He was smiling, though I could see the naked fear in his eyes. I wouldn't have expected him not to be afraid. But, mixed in with all the fear and apprehension, I saw a good dose of happiness too.
I was so focused on Chase, so fixed on him, I barely heard the rest of what the doctor had said.
“We're going to release you,” I heard her say when I finally tuned back in. “But, we encourage you to check in with an OB/Gyn soon for your regular checkups.”
“Of course,” I said.
My voice sounded far away from me. Like it was in a tunnel. Dr. Rivera left the room, leaving me alone with Chase. Neither one of us said anything until we were alone again – and not for a little while after that.
“Chase, I know you're not – ”
“Abby, listen,” he said, cutting me off. “I was a fool. I'm scared of fatherhood for the same reasons I was afraid of letting you in. I didn't want to care about anyone else. I didn't want to lose them. But it's too late for that, like I said, and I'm going to be there for my kid. No matter what, I'm not going to make the same mistakes my dad did.”
It felt like my heart had grown three sizes. I couldn't believe my ears.
“You mean you want to--”
“I want to be a family, Abby,” he said softly.
“God, me too,” I said, choking back the tears – though, this time, they were tears of happiness for a change. “I've wanted nothing more than to have a family of my own. Chase, I love you – ”
I stopped as soon as the words had slipped out, feeling my eyes widen, and an expression of absolute horror and mortification spreading across my face. Chase looked back at me, his expression one of surprise. Of astonishment. It was like somebody had sucked all the oxygen out of the room and I was finding it difficult to believe that I'd made such a terrible faux pas.
I hadn't meant to say the words. I thought them of course, but I never meant to say them out loud.
But, it was too late. They were already out there. My feelings were already out there, and there was no taking them back now. All I could do was sit back and hope that Chase had either not heard me, or would choose to ignore it, believing I was out of my mind on pain meds or something.
But, then he spoke again, and I felt like the wind had been driven from my lungs. I was beyond ecstatic.
“I - love you too, Abby,” he said.
I stared at him wide-eyed and felt the tears slipping down my face. My heart swelled to the point it felt like it was going to burst, and I couldn't keep the smile off my face. Not that long ago, my world had been turned upside down, and my life had been turned to shit. It was amazing how quickly things changed.
At least, if you let yourself be open to those changes. I was, and suddenly, it felt like all of my dreams were finally coming true and everything I ever wanted was well within my reach.
I couldn't have possibly been happier than I was in that moment.
The End
CABIN FEVER
A Mountain Man Romance
PROLOGUE
The temperature outside the walls of the cabin were near subzero, but I could feel my body heat rising. He stood staring at me like I was his prey and it was time he finally relented to the animal inside of him.
God, I fucking hoped so.
He kissed me, long and hard, and I felt his erection pressing into me. He picked me up effortlessly and carried me down the hallway with our lips still intertwined and every single part of me was electrified. He carried me into his room and laid me lightly on the bed. Then his heated gaze hooked onto mine for just a split second.
I reached up and ran my fingertips through his beard. His hair was so soft, his skin so warm. His lips encompassed mine again while my hands rounded his neck and, suddenly, I was parting my legs for him as he settled between them.
I could feel him fighting, volleying between keeping his composure and letting himself loose. I could hear him taking deep breaths, trying to quell the rising flood of energy in his body while his muscles twitched underneath every single touch. I moved his flannel button-down from his shoulders before my hands raked across his back and, in an instant, he was peeling my clothes off.
Jeans and underwear and shirts got tossed to the side. His lips were on my neck, my chest, and around my tits while his hand ran down my leg. The passion his body contained was unlike anything I’d ever felt in my life and, soon, I could feel his cock rising against my skin. It was thick and pulsing, begging for entrance while his lips suckled red welts upon my skin. I ran my hands through his hair while his lips traveled downward, kissing all the way to my toes before he got up onto his knees.
The chiseled body he hid underneath his clothes took my breath away. I could feel my arousal growing, begging for any part of him to touch me where I wanted him most.
He was staring at me like I was his prey and it was time he finally relented to the animal inside of him.