“Oh, you know he would,” Austin razzed.
You’d think with the way they went directly for the throat, there would be some hard feelings. But there was nothing but support bounding from the walls that were made for acoustics, their words an echo of encouragement as they bounced and played.
I was struck by a wave of regret.
Mark should have been here. A part of this.
I gritted my teeth, trying to hold back the rush of memories, but it was like sitting at that piano had set them free. The questions I’d done my best at dodging.
I’d accepted the path I’d been given and traveled it without question. Without any of those distractions or diversions.
Just like it applied to Lyrik? One door had been slammed in my face, and I’d been shoved through another by all the fucked-up mistakes I’d made.
Those mistakes pummeled me, right hook after right hook.
What if Mark were there? What if I hadn’t pushed him over the edge? What if he had a family?
Regret burned hot, and I attempted to shake it off while I focused on reorganizing all my shit I kept here at Ash’s. Made it easy, each of us having instruments at each other’s pads so we could play whenever inspiration struck. Usually at the drop of a dime.
Same way as the music came.
As a feeling.
An emotion.
When we were pissed and dealing with heavy shit or when we were floating with the clouds, blissed out when something amazing had come our way.
I suddenly felt the stare burning a hole in the side of my face. “So…Alexis, huh?”
This from Ash, the bastard. Had no clue how the asshole had restrained himself this long.
I shrugged. “We’re friends.”
“Really?” It was all a challenge.
Did my best to pass it off with a shrug, reining in the urge to lash out and at the same fucking time finally come clean. “Yep. Ran into her a couple weeks ago.”
And by ran, I meant I ran after her like some kind of twisted fuck. Like they needed that kind of ammunition.
“You ‘ran’ into her?”
So maybe that was obvious.
“Yep.”
“And?” he pressed.
“And we just…kind of hit it off. She’s super cool. She wants to learn how to play piano, so I’m going to teach her. Besides, that piece of shit is still out there running free after what he did to her. Wouldn’t be able to sleep at night if I thought she was down there, getting herself into trouble again.”
Silence struck the room like the ring after a bomb.
Deafening.
Baz looked at me like the dude was trying to climb right inside me. “You’re gonna teach her to play piano?”
I gave a tight nod.
He roughed a hand down his face and glanced away before that gray gaze locked on me, voice laced with caution. “How long’s it been, Zee?”
I turned away. “Doesn’t matter.”
Baz stood. “You’re really gonna stand there and pretend it doesn’t?”
Anger and regret and guilt bottled in my throat. A dangerous cocktail. “Just…don’t, man.”
Ash shook his head in some kind of pity. “Come on. You’re really going to pull this after the bullshit we’ve all been through? You’ve seen us at our lowest. Stood by us when we were making every mistake in the damned book. And that whole time we were making those mistakes? There you were…sober. Taking care of us. Going it alone like it was your responsibility.”
It was my responsibility, but he didn’t need to know that.
“Never once since the day you stepped into your brother’s shoes have I ever seen you with a girl, not since you broke up with whatever that chick’s name was when you were just a kid. And don’t pretend like you didn’t have an endless string of women just begging for your attention. And then you bring a girl into the fold and you’re gonna actually stand there and act like it’s nothin’?”
Just the fact he was mentioning Julie made me want to crawl right the hell out of my skin.
“I didn’t say it didn’t mean anything.”
Ash grinned, all teeth. “Now don’t go and get me wrong, because I am one happily married man, but that is one smoking hot woman. And the way she’s looking at you? Pretty sure the two of you are getting ready to go BAM.”
Fucker actually clapped his hands together.
His smirk grew. “And then you go and leave her with our girls for the last two hours? You’re in so much trouble, dude. Might as well hand over your balls, because I’m willing to toss down some Benjamins that girl has you by the dick.”
Trying a new tactic, I forced a grin. “You should know better than that, Ash, considering I’m the one who always ends up with all your dough.”
Austin chuckled from where he was leaning against the wall. “Except for the bedrooms, Zee…except for the pink and blue bedrooms. You totally blew that bet, brother.”
Years back when Ash had purchased the mansion in Savannah, Shea had bet him he’d be painting all the upstairs bedrooms pink and blue and filling them with a herd of baby Ashes.
I’d been a fool to bet against her. But at the time, I sure as hell didn’t think Ash would be settling down. It was a loss I’d gladly take.
Still, I played along, defending my bad bet through laugher. “Only one room so far. Shea has yet to win that bet—she said all the rooms. There are seven of them. Our boy Ash here has some work to do.”
Lyrik laughed. “Give him time, Zee, give him time.”
Baz set his hand on my shoulder. “Come on, Zee. Time to fess it up, because from where I’m standing, I don’t see what the problem is.”
Our conversation was cut short by the door cracking open.
Thank God.
I had no idea how to answer their questions. Had no response for what had changed or why I’d been that way in the first place. For years, they’d razzed me, giving me shit left and right. But it’d always been off-handed, in the end the lot of them letting me rest in peace.
Peace was about the farthest thing from what I felt.
Especially when in came a tumble of gorgeous women with even prettier hearts. They slipped into the attached sitting area off to the front of the big space that served as Ash’s music room.
But it was the one who came in behind Shea that stole my breath.
Literally.
Her eyes found mine and she lifted her hand in a small, timid wave, just a curl of her fingers before she followed Shea the rest of the way in.
Seeing her standing there in the mix of the women who’d come to mean the most to me felt like that was exactly where she was supposed to be. Like she belonged.
Shea plopped into one of the plush couches. “Hope y’all don’t mind us interrupting, but we figured if Alexis came all the way over here to spend the evening with us, she could at least get a glimpse at our sexy men doing what they do best.”