Spiralling Skywards: Fading (Contradictions, #2)

He stared at me for a few seconds with his eyebrows drawn tightly together and his lips pinched into a tight line. I knew that I’d pissed him off but I didn’t care.

“What the fuck is wrong with you? I tell ya, Sunshine, these pregnancy hormones are seriously messing with your head. I’ve never known you to be such a bitch. No wonder Del stays at the office. I wouldn’t wanna be coming home to you either.”

My mouth actually hung open. My brother had never spoken to me like that before.

“You’re just pissed off because I mentioned Shain and Sasha. I’ve seen the way you look at her. I know there’s something going on.”

“You know nothing.” He bit out before getting up and storming into the kitchen. I heard the fridge door open and glass bottles clink.

Luke stayed in the kitchen for a full five minutes, and before he came back, the fridge opened again and there was more clinking of glass bottles.

“Finished your little hissy fit, brat?”

“You gonna tell me what the deal is with Sasha?”

“There is no deal with Sasha.”

“You’re a liar. I’ve seen you, Luke.”

“Seen what exactly?”

“The way you look at her. You look at her like Liam looks at me. She looks at you like I look at Liam.”

I didn’t wanna betray my best friend, but surely he must have realised how much she liked him.

“All of us Luke, everyone, including Sasha, have been waiting for you to make a move. Even now, she doesn’t love Shain, if you finally grew a pair and stopped pussying around she’d drop him for you.”

I didn’t think I’d ever seen my brother look so angry. Well, at least not since he first found out about me and Liam. He was grinding his teeth and working his jaw as he stared at me.

“And you know all of this how? Has she told you she doesn’t love Shain?”

“Yes.”

“Has she told you she wants to be with me?”

“No, but she told me that she’s so in love with you that she can’t breathe when your around.”

He closed his eyes for a few long seconds.

“Fuck,” he whispered, so, so quietly I barely heard it over the crack of the fire.

“What’s holding you back? I know you have feelings for her.”

He closed his eyes again, shook his head, and took a deep breath through his nose. When he opened them and looked at me, I could see a whole world of hurt written all over my brother’s face.

“I fucked up. I did something really, really stupid a long time ago and it means that me and Sasha can never happen.”

“But why? I don’t understand.”

“It’s not something I wanna talk about. If I tell you, then it means I’ll be putting you in a position where you might have to lie for me one day, and I don’t wanna do that.”

“I’d lie for you any day.”

“I know you would. I know you would, but I don’t want you to have to, so we’ll just leave things at that.”

I knew my brother well enough to know that the conversation was over, so I said no more.

I jumped as my phone vibrated in my hand. Hoping it was Liam, I flipped it open.

It was a text from Sasha.

Sash: Hey, fat girl, fancy some company?

“It’s Sasha, she wants to come over.”

Luke scratched at his chin and sighed. “Tell her yes. I’ll leave you girls to it.”

“Why can’t I have both of you here?”

“I can’t be around her, Sarah. It fucking hurts. You’re right. I do have feelings for her, but it won’t ever happen. It can’t ever happen.”

“I’ll just tell her no then.”

“No. Have some girl time. I’m gonna see if I can get on an earlier flight. As long as you’ve got someone here with you, Del will be fine with it.”

“I love you, you know that, right?”

“Of course I do. I love you, too. Just hang in there. Take it easy on Del and remember he’s doing all this for you.”

I nodded.

“Now, text your crazy mate back and tell her to come look after you.”

While my brother gathered his stuff from our spare bedroom, I texted Sasha back, all the while wondering what the deal was with Luke.

As if they coordinated their switch, Sasha arrived to spend the night just ten minutes after Luke left.





I woke with my head hanging over the side of the bed. There was a sour smell invading my nostrils, and when I opened one eye, I found myself staring down at a pile of my own puke.

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