He holds me close. He holds me secure. He holds me like I haven’t been held in so long.
I close my eyes and rest in his safety. I try to find my center, feel the world around me, and allow the calm to wash over me. I’m so lost, weightlessly drifting and hoping for something to tether me. Right now, I feel as if I’ve been caught and I might be able to stand on my own. In his arms, I can fight.
My fingers grip his shirt, and I slowly raise my gaze until I find his eyes. I hold on with everything I have. I don’t want to let go. I don’t want to float anymore. “Zach,” I whisper. “Don’t let me go.”
He doesn’t let go as he presses his forehead to mine. We stand like this, wrapped up in each other as I beg God for my son.
Please, I need him. I’ve lost too much.
Zach’s head lifts from mine. I open my eyes and look at him but he’s searching for something.
“Presley,” Zach’s arms fall. The calm I had vanishes with his embrace. “Look, over there!”
My eyes go to the spot he’s pointing to. There’s a horse tied to a branch. “Cayden,” I mumble. “Cayden!” I scream out and run as fast as my legs can move.
“Cayden!” Zach calls out looking around. “Where are you, buddy?”
We call out over and over as I rush toward the tree. “It’s my dad’s horse. It’s Shortstop!” I say to Zach as we scour the area. “He was here.” We both take off in different directions looking for where he could be.
“Mom!” Cayden’s voice cracks.
I scan the area, trying to find where his little voice is coming from.
“I found him!” Zach yells as he rushes down the hill. “We’re here, Cayden.”
My heart pounds against my ribs as I run to them. I start to cry as my feet slide against the wet leaves. I move as fast as I can, and the second I see him, I can breathe. “Cayden!” Relief floods me. He’s okay.
Zach drapes his jacket around Cayden and my arms fly around him. I pull my son into my arms as I sob. “You’re okay. Oh, thank God, you’re okay.” I touch his face and push his hair back to make sure he’s not bleeding.
“Are you hurt?” Zach asks.
Cayden cries in my arms and nods. “I fell. I tied Shortstop to the tree and then I couldn’t get back up. I’m sorry, Mom.”
“Shh,” I say and try to soothe him. “All that matters is that you’re okay.” I kiss the top of his head and look at Zach, who smiles and lets out a sigh.
“I can’t walk,” he says.
Zach doesn’t falter before he’s scooping my son up and climbing the hill. “Just hold on, buddy.”
Cayden’s arms wrap around Zach’s neck as he carries him. Once we get to the top, he crouches down and Cayden practically leaps into my arms. “I’ve got you, baby.” It feels like a dream. I truly didn’t know if we’d find him. I tried to focus on anything but the possible outcome where it didn’t end with him in my arms.
Zach’s hand rubs my back and the smile doesn’t leave his face. “You had us worried there, man.”
Cayden closes his eyes as a tear treks down his cheek. “I didn’t know where I was. I remember Uncle Cooper saying to stay along the water, but I didn’t know which way I was going.”
“You did the right thing,” Zach reassures him. “I’m going to call everyone.” He ruffles Cayden’s hair before turning away.
“Zach.” I capture his attention. “Thank you for keeping your promise. Thank you for everything.” I don’t think he can begin to imagine what this means to me. He is everything I could need tonight. Protector, savior, and friend.
He nods once and walks away with the phone to his ear. I hear him in the distance letting everyone know we found him. You can hear the hoots and hollers of people in the woods. The community came out in full force, and we’re all going home with a smile.
Exhaustion hits Cayden and he falls asleep in my arms. It hasn’t been more than five minutes, and he’s out. Between the emotional and physical things he’s been through, he’s spent. Zach comes back over and rubs the side of Cayden’s face as he sleeps.
“He looks like you,” Zach muses.
“Well, that means Logan does too.” I laugh and stare at the reason for my existence as he sleeps. I glance back at Zach who moves his hand.
Zach turns his head quickly. “They both do.”
“Zach?”
I don’t know why he keeps pulling back. I’m not exactly giving him the clearest of signals, but he’s not either. He’s dating Felicia, kissing me, leaving her at the bar, but she’s living with him. Plus, he scares the shit out of me. I’ve lived that pain. I’ve lived through more agony at the hands of men who love me than any woman should. Of course I’m wary. Now that he knows the truth, I’d think he would understand it more.
“We should head back. I’ll ride with him if you can guide Shortstop.”