“What dreams did you give up?” Carl said.
“Oh, golly. Dreams. Me and my dreams are pretty hopeless at this point.”
“We are never without hope. Talk to me, Eliza. Tell me what else is on your heart.”
I was quiet then. I wanted to tell him about my cookbook and about Greece and why I was so passionate about it. But those passions had been completely squelched every time they were mentioned. Maybe there had been other things at other times. I couldn’t remember in that moment when I’d just seen my whole world blown to bits.
“My mother died when I was very young.”
“I think I knew that.”
“Yes. She was from Greece. Corfu, actually.”
“It’s in the Ionian Sea, isn’t it?”
“Yes. Anyway, when I was really little we used to take a family vacation there almost every year. It was idyllic. I mean, there was an innocence about the village where my grandmother lived that’s unlike anything I’ve ever encountered here. Or maybe wholesomeness is a better way to describe it. Dogs and chickens wandering around. When we arrived, it seemed like every single person in Dassia came to my grandmother’s house to see the Americans. And they all brought my brother and me a little gift to welcome us.”
“That’s awfully nice.”
“Yes. It was. And my grandmother! She couldn’t get enough of us! She absolutely beamed with happiness to have us there. We had these elaborate meals that she spent all day preparing and then we’d set up tables in her courtyard with lanterns strung between the branches. These dinners went on forever. All the neighbors came and went. It seemed like meals started with lunch and lasted until midnight.”
“Too bad life’s not really like that anymore. Who has the time?”
“Well, family was everything to my grandmother.”
“Like it is for you.”
“Yes.”
“And let me guess, she’s why you love to cook so much.”
“Probably. And it’s also the place where I felt the most loved in my entire life.”
“You know Adam loves you.”
“I know. But not enough to get off the couch.” I looked at Carl and he stared at me. I could almost hear him thinking, Yeah, and Eve loves me, but not enough to put her clothes on. “I’ve always dreamed of going back to Greece to see if there are still relatives and what happened to my grandmother’s old house. Maybe see some skinny dogs walking around.”
“I’ve never been to Greece. Always wanted to, but somehow it just never worked out.”
“Well, this might be a good time for me to go. I think my brother said that one of our cousins has a B and B. We’ll see. Mr. Stanley can have some time to stew and so can I.”
“Maybe Eve needs a little time out herself,” he said.
“That’s your call. Hey, isn’t it weird that we both came here this morning? What a coincidence.” There are no coincidences, I reminded myself.
“Yes. I drove almost all night. I couldn’t sleep. Something told me I’d find her here.”
“Well, the four of us have been coming here for how many years?”
“Too many to count.”
“It’s where I always found peace. I feel like my church has been desecrated.”
Carl looked at me then as he processed what I’d said. And then his face changed to one of worry and wonder.
“Do you think they’re still in love with each other?” he said.
I didn’t know how to answer him. I’d questioned it myself. But I thought then about the four of us and what we meant to each other. We had shared every single milestone of our lives with each other for decades. And it wasn’t like we didn’t have other friends, because we did. But no other foursome was as satisfying or as interesting to each of us.
Over the years, I’d often thought that God forbid something happened to Adam or one of the boys, Carl would be the first person I’d call. It didn’t matter that he lived hours away. Heaven knows, he had saved the life of my son. Our relationships with each other went beyond the usual expectations of normal friendship, and they always had. The trust and reliance was built on years of care. There could never be another foursome that would supersede what we shared. No, Eve, Carl, Adam, and I were solidly and forever entrenched deeply in each other’s hearts.
“Carl? I think that to some extent we’re all in love with each other.”
“It’s true.”
“And I think it’s been like that from the get-go. If Adam’s affection for Eve has crossed a line, or vice versa, I couldn’t say. But the whole business doesn’t seem right.”
“It sure doesn’t.”
“This morning I woke up a happy housewife thinking I’d surprise my husband with a lovely lunch and a nice bottle of Chianti. Now I’m wondering what to do about the rest of my life.”
I sat there searching Carl’s face for answers he couldn’t possibly have for me. Or for himself.
“Eliza. Nothing is really changed, and yet I feel like I got blindsided too. I need to think about this. Meanwhile, I think it’s time for me to start driving back to Raleigh. I’ve got some mighty sick children depending on me. Stay in touch with me, okay?”
“Okay. Let’s go.” We began walking back to our cars and I glanced at our windows. There was no sign of Adam. And when I looked over at Carl and Eve’s place, it looked dark. Metaphorically? The life force had left the buildings.
Carl and I exchanged a familial hug, one of the somber, reassuring ilk. Then we got into our cars, me into my new white Benz SUV and Carl into his Lexus sedan, and left Wild Dunes and our spouses behind.
I drove home in something of a stupor, reliving the entire episode mile by mile. Had Carl and I overreacted? No. Did Adam still love me? I knew that he did. But how could I forgive this?
I got home and pulled my car into the garage. I went inside through the door to the kitchen, and suddenly my house that I loved so much seemed like a hall of gloom. It had a personality, to be sure, but gloom had never been a part of it. But crazy as it may sound, it was as though the house knew what had happened.