“I don’t know if I should have done—” Cas began.
She didn’t want to hear the end of that sentence. She cut him off with another kiss, putting both her hands on his cheeks. Her fingers grazed over the stubble on his jaw and trailed down his neck and to his chest. She wanted to memorize how he felt against her.
He wrapped his arms around her so tightly her feet almost left the ground. His lips left hers, but he didn’t pull away. Their foreheads touched as he spoke softly. “Promise me this wasn’t part of the plan.”
“I promise,” she whispered. “I tried so hard not to fall for you and failed miserably.”
One side of his mouth turned up, and he brushed her hair away from her face as he leaned down to kiss her again. He was slow this time, letting his lips linger and his breath tickle across her mouth. She let herself collapse into him, let herself forget where she was and what she had to do.
When they finally broke apart, his hair was messy from her fingers, his mouth red. She imagined she looked about the same.
“I should be most angry about you conspiring with Olso to start a war,” he said breathlessly. “Or about the fact that my father died because of events you put in motion. But I was most angry that you pretended to have feelings for me.” He shook his head, a short laugh escaping his mouth. “How stupid is that?”
She smiled, biting her bottom lip to try to keep her grin from spreading too far across her face. “You underestimate yourself if you think any woman would have to pretend to have feelings for you.”
He grinned, his cheeks turning pink. The expression fell off his face almost as soon as it came, and she knew what he was thinking. It didn’t matter how they felt about each other. There was no world where the king of Lera could be with a Flores, even if she hadn’t destroyed his kingdom.
“I was scared to tell you the truth,” she said. “I know it’s no excuse, but a tiny part of me was afraid you would immediately send someone to move or kill Olivia if I told you about the attack. I asked for them to spare you. But you saw the warriors. They’re not exactly taking orders from me.”
He nodded slowly. “You can have your sister when we get to the Southern Mountains. I’ll release her. Then I want you to run away as fast as you can.”
Gratitude swelled inside of her, and she had to swallow down tears. “Thank you, Cas.”
“You’ll probably need to stay hidden when we arrive. If my mother or Jovita sees you, I don’t think I can provide them with a reason why you shouldn’t stand trial.” He winced, like he was suddenly in pain. “I can’t order your execution. I don’t even think that’s what you deserve, and I would never recover from that.”
“Thank you,” she whispered again.
“Assuming the Olso warriors don’t kill me, I’ll convince my advisers that it’s best to focus on them, and not you. I think we’ll have our hands full for quite a while.” His expression turned serious. “If you promise not to attack Lera again.”
“If you promise not to execute the Ruined simply for their magic.”
“Agreed.”
“Agreed.” She began to smile at him, but the relief of their arrangement was quickly overshadowed by the fact that this meant they would likely never see each other again. He wore a matching expression, and she reached out, finding his hand.
When the jungle fell into darkness that night Em’s eyelids felt heavy and her feet and legs ached. She suggested they rest for the night and Cas agreed. He pulled her close to him as soon as they sat down in the dirt against a large tree trunk. Her body began sending off sparks immediately, the exhaustion she’d felt a few seconds again vanishing.
“Don’t let them take away your rightful position as queen,” Cas said quietly, resting his chin on top of her head.
“What?” She put one hand on his chest.
“You should be queen of your people, whether you have Ruined magic or not. Maybe especially because you don’t. Your mother’s biggest failing was her overreliance on magic. You proved that you don’t need any to defeat your enemies. They should be celebrating you, not telling you you’re useless.”
“Quite a compliment, coming from one of my ‘enemies.’”
“You can tell them I said that. Or maybe don’t, if you think it will actually hurt the cause.” She smiled, and he put one hand on her neck and ducked his head down to kiss her. Her body responded immediately, and she was suddenly shifting, sliding onto his lap with one knee on either side of him.
His fingers burned fire across her neck. His lips joined them and she had to grab his shoulder with one hand to keep herself steady. But it was a hopeless act, because she was anything but steady.