It kind of hurt to know I’d been feeling something so different than she had.
Clearing my throat, I rubbed my damp palms on the legs of my jeans and focused my attention on her window. “Uh...yeah. I guess that’s my one talent.”
“Oh, whatever. You’re great at everything.” Sarah pushed the laptop off her and onto the bed between us. “I’m going to change into my pajamas. Are you staying?”
I didn’t want to stay. I wanted to run and hide. I felt too vulnerable and exposed to stick around. But when it took me too long to speak and she glanced back for my answer, I couldn’t tell her no, so I nodded. “Sure.”
“Great. You can help me brush my hair.”
Dammit, I loved brushing her hair as much as I loved her...like love her loved her. Why the hell had I never realized that until this very moment?
This was bad. This was so bad. What if she found out and freaked because she could only love me as a friend? She’d never once done anything to show any kind of romantic interest, so it was likely I’d scare her away completely if I didn’t control this right now.
Friends. We’re just friends, I commanded myself as Sarah maneuvered herself off her bed and into her wheelchair without any assistance from me. As she left the room briefly, I paced the floor, forcing every lovey-dovey thought I’d ever had for her back into my head.
I felt lots better, and back in control of whatever the hell had just happened when the door opened again, and she rolled into the room. Until I looked up and lost it once more. But she was so pretty in a classically flawless, innocent way. The only word that tumbled around in my head when I looked at her was: mine.
It was freaking weird.
“Sorry,” she said, looking chagrined. “Reese caught me coming out of the bathroom and offered to brush it. I couldn’t tell her you were in here waiting to do it.”
It took me a moment to understand what she was talking about until she motioned to her silky hair that was perfectly brushed.
“Oh,” I stumbled out. “No, that’s okay. No problem.”
I jammed my hands awkwardly into my pockets as I stood there like a dumbass and watched her struggle out of her chair and back onto the bed. My pulse accelerated as she lifted the blankets and crawled under. Then she scooted in enough to make room for me.
When I didn’t move, she finally looked up. “What’s wrong?”
Shit. I hurried forward, quickly saying, “Nothing.”
She sent me an odd look, but then shrugged and lay down with her back toward me. I fumbled as I toed off my shoes. Then I gritted my teeth and silently commanded myself to calm the fuck down. I’d slept next to her tons of times. This would be no different.
Except it felt so completely different.
I held my breath as I joined her on the mattress. She let out a content sigh and I closed my eyes because the sound sent a strange tremor through me. As soon as I rolled onto my side and faced her, the familiar scent of her hair filled my nostrils. I breathed in deeply, loving the scent. Scooting forward, I buried my nose into the silky soft tresses, letting them caress my cheeks.
She had the most beautiful, dark hair. Since she’d moved in with her brother, Reese had taken up the job of styling it and fixing it a lot, so it always looked cute, but I had to admit, I liked it best grown out a little like it was now and floating down around her shoulders.
Her breathing deepened and her shaking calmed, telling me she’d fallen asleep. I wrapped an arm around her waist, pillowed my head into her hair and just...let it all go, glad I’d stayed after all. I loved sleeping with her. It was the most peaceful, stress-relieving time of my day. And I really needed to relieve a little stress right now.
Despite how tense and uncomfortable I’d been moments ago, I was totally relaxed now.
I passed out within seconds with a smile on my face while petting my cheek against strands of her hair.
When I woke up some time later, I don’t think I’d been dreaming because I couldn’t remember any dream. But I was throbbing hard and I knew exactly why. Sarah’s ass was pressed snug against my lap and my hand had somehow found its way under her shirt where I was cupping a naked breast.
Before I was fully awake enough to realize what was going on, my thumb slid over a hardened nipple, which shot a pulse of painful need through my dick and had me moaning and pressing myself harder against her ass.
In the next instant, I woke completely, yelping, “Holy shit,” as I yanked my hand off her breast and jerked my hips backward.
Sarah didn’t even stir. She’d always been a heavy sleeper, but for the longest moment, I was sure she had to be faking it to avoid the awkwardness of this moment, because goddamn, I was wide fucking awake. I mean, I’d just had my hand on her... And my dick had been... Jesus.
I was going to best friend hell for sure.