I stared out the window of my office. The view of New York stretched from floor to ceiling. Hundreds of cars and people milled around below. Life went on, day after day. Nothing ever made this city slow down.
But yesterday’s news had stopped me dead in my tracks. Olivia was carrying my child. Barring something tragic, our lives would be forever changed. She’d been pregnant for weeks, and we never knew it. I’d committed everything to her since then. I’d professed my love to her, and I’d meant it with all my heart.
Had I known somehow, deep down, that she would be forever tied to me after that night?
I’d held her all night, until the tears slowed and she clung to me like I was the only one who could bring her peace. She’d fallen asleep against me, and as I stared into the darkness, I contemplated how dramatically life could change. In the blink of an eye, everything had taken on new meaning and purpose. Olivia needed me, and in nine months, so would our child.
Waking up to an empty bed filled me with a kind of anxiety I’d never experienced. I heard Ian’s voice in my head, telling me to give her time and space. Seeking that might have been her first instinct, but I wasn’t accepting it. I’d created this situation, but I wasn’t letting her go. From this moment forward, she was mine to care for in every way, and I’d be damned if I was going to let anything get in my way.
I pulled my phone from my pocket and dialed her number. She picked up after the first ring.
“I got worried when you weren’t home this morning,” I said.
“I woke up early and didn’t want to disturb you.”
“Is that the truth?”
She was silent a moment. “Not entirely. I wasn’t ready to face Ian. And Cam and Maya had their baby last night. Seeing them was more important than dealing with any of my own drama this morning.”
“How are they doing?”
“Really good. The baby is beautiful.”
I couldn’t miss the irony that we would be facing the same situation in nine short months. The thought didn’t make me as uncomfortable as maybe it should have. With anyone else, I’d be freaking the fuck out. Even though the prospect of imminent fatherhood was filled with unknowns and a litany of fears, knowing that I’d be going into that part of my life with Olivia filled me with an unexpected calm.
“That’s great. I’m really happy for them,” I said, truly meaning it.
“Me too. They’ll all be home in a couple days. I’m going to do some things around their apartment today to help them out.”
“Okay, but I want you to stay at the penthouse tonight.”
“Are you beckoning me?”
Her tone was even, not sweet and teasing the way it might have been under different circumstances.
“You’re goddamn right. I’m beckoning you.”
“Will—”
“The thought of you going through what you went through last night alone is unacceptable to me. I love you. I’m here for you. Whatever you’re working through, I want to be there to help you work through it. Not to mention, I’m trying to figure out a few things out too.”
She sighed softly. “Fine. I’ll take care of what I need to here first though.”
“Whatever you need to do. Also, I’m going to hire movers this week to help you get the rest of your things to the penthouse. I want you with me. Every night.”
“What about Ian?”
What about Ian… God, we had to tell him sometime, and I wasn’t looking forward to it one bit. I’d barely had a chance to wrap my head around her being pregnant myself. I was so busy getting her to calm down last night, I hadn’t spent much time thinking about how Ian would receive the news.
“We have to tell him. The sooner the better, I imagine. He won’t like to think he was kept in the dark for very long.”
“You’re right.” She exhaled heavily. “Maybe tonight. If I can work up the courage.” I heard her mutter a curse.
“We’ll tell him together. It’ll be okay.”
As I reassured her, I worried that Ian might not adjust to the news as well as I hoped he would. I tried to imagine if our positions were reversed. Imagining it, however briefly, reinforced how grateful I was that I’d been the one who fucked up.
“Olivia.”
“What?”
“Last night, when I told you I was sorry… I am sorry that I violated your trust. You didn’t want or ask for this. But now that we’re here, I want you to know that I’m not sorry about it. It’s not what either of us expected, but I’m glad it’s with you. I’m ready to take this journey with you.”
She sniffed and sighed quietly on the other end of the phone. “I’m feeling more ready too. Meeting the baby today put things into perspective for me. I think I’m more ready for this than I thought.”
I closed my eyes and tightened my grip on the phone. I wanted to hold her, kiss her, and remind her how much I loved her.
“I love you, Olivia.”
“I love you too.”
Chapter Eighteen
IAN